_FLATLINE_

My top 50 hip hop records of all time

2008-12-07T10:48:00.001-08:00

01. Public Enemy - Rebel Without A Pause
02. Paris - The Devil Made Me Do It
03. RUN DMC - Peter Piper
04. Eric B & Rakim - Juice (Know The Ledge)
05. Ice-T - Midnight
06. Scarface - Now I Feel Ya
07. Erick Sermon featuring Kam & Ice Cube - The Ill Shit
08. A Tribe Called Quest - Buggin' Out
09. De La Soul - Area
10. Pete Rock & CL Smooth - T.R.O.Y.
11. The Notorious B.I.G., Big Mike, Bone Thugs N Harmony, Buckshot, Busta Rhymes, Coolio, Ill Al Skratch and Redman - The Points
12. Camp Lo - Black Nostaljack
13. Boogie Down Productions - Criminal Minded
14. KRS ONE - Sound Of Da Police
15. Gang Starr - Mass Appeal
16. Craig Mack featuring The Notorious B.I.G., Rampage, LL Cool J & Busta Rhymes - Flava In Your Ear (remix)
17. Wu-Tang Clan - Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthing Ta F' Wit
18. Masta Ace - Beautiful
19. Eminem - The Way I Am
20. Atmosphere - Yesterday
21. 3rd Bass - Steppin' To The A.M.
22. Black Moon - I Got Cha Opin (remix)
23. House Of Pain - Back From The Dead
24. Common Sense - I Used To Love H.E.R.
25. Brother Ali - Faheem
26. Kurious - Spell It Wit A J
27. Cypress Hill - How I Could Just Kill A Man
28. Nas - N.Y. State Of Mind
29. Doug E Fresh & The Get Fresh Crew - The Show
30. Funkdoobiest - Bow Wow Wow
31. Cage - Grand Ol' Party Crash
32. Jay-Z - 99 Problems
33. Kool Moe Dee - I Go To Work
34. Nice & Smooth - Hip Hop Junkies
35. Souls Of Mischief - 93 Til Infinity
36. NWA - Straight Outta Compton
37. Redman - Time 4 Sum Aksion
38. O.C. featuring Big L - Dangerous
39. Dr.Octagon - Blue Flowers
40. LL Cool J - Mama Said Knock You Out
41. Cru featuring Ras Kass - The Ebonic Plague
42. The D.O.C. - It's Funky Enough
43. Eazy-E - Nobody Move
44. Fugees - Nappy Heads (remix)
45. Outkast - B.O.B.
46. Beastie Boys - Paul Revere
47. Jurassic 5 - The Influence
48. XZIBIT - Chamber Music
49. Snoop Doggy Dogg - Murder Was The Case
50. Big Daddy Kane - Raw

ALMIGHTY interview

2008-10-06T12:00:00.000-07:00

Flatline: The Almighty consists of Killah Priest, M-Eighty, Bronze Nazareth, Son One, C-Rayz Walz and 5 Star. Who masterminded this project and said, let's get these particular emcee's together?

M-Eighty: That would be the genius that is M-Eighty. All jokes aside, I was in the studio with Priest and Son One on my birthday last year and had told Priest about my idea for a group that was yet to be titled. Priest and Son were definitely feeling the idea and were shocked when I was telling them who all I wanted as group members of the soon titled “Almighty” and who I would line up as features. Almost 7 months later, Almighty as a group was able to concoct a legendary album and everyone associated with the project left feeling as if the Almighty was that first step in this full circle movement back to the true essence of hip hop.

Flatline: Was it difficult coordinating everyone's schedules to get the album recorded, and on another level, the skills and personality that each member brought to the table?

M-Eighty: Surprisingly it was not difficult to coordinate all the personalities and schedules of everyone. It was a timely process and it did involve a lot of traveling back and forth between LA, Michigan, Chicago, Indianapolis, New York, Virginia, etc but I think all the traveling and hard work is what made the name Almighty resonate with truth.

Flatline: The album, "Original S.I.N." dropped at the end of July. How has the response been, in terms of sales and the live shows that you guys have been doing?

C-Rayz Walz: This is a classic album that will just get better with time. It roped out of literally nowhere. It's way too good to be something that just passed by. It wasn't promoted or supported at all by the label. Babygrande should re-release it with a full fledge tour with all member and guest artists and I guarantee the planet will shake from the force of the Almighty. The best emcee's in the world are on that LP. It is the best group record this year. If you find a better record you can punch me in the mouth. Almighty is the mayweather of hip-hop music. Period.

Flatline: You got some real nice guest spots from Planet Asia, Canibus and Keith Murray. DJ JS-1 from the Rocksteady Crew is also featured. What was it like getting down with these individuals in the studio?

M-Eighty: Due to the extensive amount of traveling I was already doing to coordinate efforts amongst the group members, I was not able to sit in on all the sessions for the features. JS-1 was referred to me by C-Rayz Walz and we would just go back and forth via email and text until he understood exactly what I was looking for on a track and was able to deliver. JS is a sharp dude and I was definitely satisfied with his work at the end of the day. The same goes for Bis and Keith. Canibus, Keith, and I had discussed the concept and the theme behind the Almighty and “Handle the Heights” on several occasions before they each recorded their joints and both of them came off exactly how I had hoped. Had it not been for that constant communication between everyone than I don’t think the track or the album for that matter would have been nearly as cohesive.

Flatline: Bronze Nazareth, after years of putting in work on various projects, you've really come into your own as a dope producer. Besides maybe an obvious influence from early RZA beats, who else inspires you?

Bronze Nazareth: I’m inspired by the greats, Primo, Pete Rock, Prince Paul, etc but I also have a good respect for producers who aren't even in my same style. I really just respect banging music. I love Polow Da Don's "Hero" that he did for Nas, I listen and respect old and new. My inspiration just comes from dope hip hop and skillful music. I can take it from the Bomb Squad, to BCC, to Polow, I just respect good music.

Flatline: To me, Son One really comes through as the underdog who shines brightest on this album. Does the lyrical company you keep help push you to write the best stuff you can?

Son One: Well, being amongst the elite emcee's in this industry you are forced to step your game up. Being a new comer to the game first impression is everything, if you don't come correct on your first showing; many times you're not given a second chance. Plus growing up listening to these artists that have influenced me, it's almost like I want to make them proud.

Flatline: As a group, did you come up with the idea for the album cover? Design-wise, it's sure to be one of the best of the year.

M-Eighty: Appreciate it very much. I was introduced to a designer in Indianapolis named Aaron Scamihorn and I told him the dynamic of the Almighty and what my intentions were for the groups effect upon hip hop in 2008 in the cover art is what he was able to come up with based off the profound way I spoke about how intense and powerful this album would be at this point in time for the hip hop community.

Flatline: What has the response been from females who have heard or seen you perform "Soul Position"? It's very much in the same vein as "Ice Cream" or "Killa Lipstick".

5-Star: Females love the song! Every good group drops a hot joint for the ladies. Tribe has “Electric Relaxation,” The Roots have “Silent Treatment,” EPMD has “Jane,” the list goes on and on. So when Eighty came at me with the title “Soul Position” and told about C-Rayz on the hook I knew it would be classic and the response from the Ladies is incredible!! They really feeling it.

Flatline: Anyone wanna speak on the upcoming election, any thoughts on the candidates?

Son One: Wow! Even though I am not very political and don't follow politics much, I know that this country needs change. Obama stands for change and if this country is to progress and get better as a nation then changes must be made. Though I can't speak much about McCain I know he shares a lot of the same interests and ideas of the current administration. This country is in no condition to deal with another four years of Bush. What other way to start change then to put the first black president in office. GO VOTE SON!

Bronze Nazareth: Obama '08 obviously! McCain is another puppet, and I don't even know where to start with Palin....

Flatline: M-Eighty, do you want to let our readers in on what you have planned for 2009?

M-Eighty: So much work in 2009 that I have moved my office into my apartment. I will be handling A&R administration for both Bronze Nazareth’s “School for the Blindman” and The Wisemen “Wisemen Arrived” albums via Babygrande Records, executive producing Almighty’s follow-up to “Original S.I.N” via Babygrande Records and A&R’ing several releases for Ken Stumbo’s and Noah Hartkoph’s new hip hop label Criminal Records Music Group based out of Washington including Sunz of Man member 60 Second Assassin, a collaborative effort between Keith Murray and Canibus, C-Rayz Walz, Son One, Kevlaar 7, and more. After all the albums are made and the tours are wrapped up then hip hop heads will be able to rejoice in what I believe to be one of the most innovative inventions of our time, “SPITBOXX”, but that is for another interview at another time.

Flatline: As I listen to the Almighty album, Wu-Tang could break up tomorrow and never make another album, but the statement holds true - "Wu-Tang Forever". I think, as a group, you guys really put in some good work on this joint that will help keep the legacy alive. What's next?

Killah Priest: No doubt. I just wrapped up “Beautiful Minds” with Chief Kamachi and am working on “Behind the Stained Glass Part 2” amongst many other things. Big up to all my G-ciples and everyone who showed me love on the road with GZA. M-Eighty is definitely a solid dude and he knows I’m gonna rep whatever project he believes in because I know he’s always believed in me.

Bronze Nazareth: Just making sure we’re working up to our potential and exceeding all expectations to make sure that mouths get fed and heads stay open.

M-Eighty: Keeping it 100, knocking negative out the box, and thanking adonai everyday for keeping me blessed. Almighty for now and forever, Peace.

EVERLAST interview

2008-10-05T22:03:00.000-07:00

Flatline: I want to know what keeps you going. Going from The Syndicate, to House Of Pain, to your solo career. What keeps you motivated musically?

Everlast: I don't know, it's hard to say. Sometimes I'm not motivated at all. Like the last couple of years, I didn't feel like doing anything so I didn't...but it helps to have the luxury of being able to do that. But just the music...in general, I like making music.

Flatline: Is it a better situation now that you're on a different label, allowing you the creative freedom to do what you want, when you want to do it?

Everlast: Yeah, I mean, it's pretty much my label. My publishing company is a partner with me and my managers, we started this distribution company...and it's small right now, but we'll see what happens. I'm happy with it. You know, I've never had anybody tell me what kind of music to make since my first album with Warner Bros. It was like they got involved with that and, you know, I didn't really like about half that record...about half that record I really like a lot, even though it was twenty years ago...

Flatline: Like, Syndicate Soldier?

Everlast: Yeah, sure...

Flatline: I Got The Knack?

Everlast: No, see, I Got The Knack, that was one of them songs where...I don't ever go around blaming people for like, oh they made me do this, they made me do that...but at that time, think about it - Wild Thing by Tone-Loc was the hot rap record. Gibson guitar, bass sample...My Sharona...I Got The Knack from My Sharona?? It was like, it wasn't even that thought out when you think about it. You can tell it was just kinda done to be done. Of course, the record people and the higher ups got those records made. Those are the ones they wanted made when I wanted a more credible stance, you know? But even then, rap was new in the game. There were very few people selling records in hip hop at that moment.

Flatline: As far back as I can recall, I don't remember ever hearing the reason why you left The Syndicate.

Everlast: It was just business, it was just business. I got hip quick to record contracts and, you know, maybe being signed to something through...although, Ice-T to this day, I just seen him not too long ago and I let him know, hey, thanks for opening the door for me and all that. I just realized it's better to be signed straight to a record company than being signed to a record company through somebody else. I learned a lot about publishing and I wasn't in control of my publishing then. So it was a bunch of stuff like that. Probably, when I left, I was like fuck this...but on the same note, I couldn't have told you that's what I was going to wind up doing for a living. Like I said, it wasn't like tons of people were making money at it. More than leaving The Syndicate, I was leaving Warner Bros. and I pissed off a lot of people there. There was a while where I couldn't send an Everlast demo anywhere because this little word had gotten out amongst a certain group of powerful people, that this guy is trouble, he's all this, that and the other. So that's kinda when House Of Pain came into play. Me and Danny - a friend of mine for a long time, Lethal was already with me from the Syndicate days. Me and Danny had an Irish kinship and a b-boy kinship. He had the name and the fuckin' look and all the graphics and it just all clicked up.

Flatline: It was like a House Of Pain brand almost...

Everlast: Yeah, and then, a lot of people don't know this - we were a live band. We were a hip hop group but we were a live band. Then, me and Muggs, who I had already known cause 7A3 was almost in The Syndicate...I bumped into him again and heard the Cypress album about eight or nine months before it came out. I was like, oh shit, y'all are gonna kill'em dog, no one even knows this is coming. Then me and B-Real started hanging out and started rhyming together. B-Real was the one that told Muggs, you better fuckin' snatch him up. The rest just kinda went down. Jump Around was made in fuckin' Muggs driveway...not even his driveway, his aunt's driveway. That's where I wrote that shit.

Flatline: That's crazy. I saw you with House Of Pain when you had Rage Against The Machine opening up for you guys...

Everlast: Right? When nobody else would take them out cause they were scared of them.

Flatline: Yeah, right before their first album dropped. I want to know, at what point did you decide to pick up a guitar and switch up your style a little bit?

Everlast: Well, I had always had guitar around me man, even before House Of Pain and all that. There's a few House Of Pain songs where I played a little piece and then we looped it up, things like that. I just kinda played to relax. When I didn't wanna think about anything else, I just strum on a guitar. When I quit House Of Pain, honestly, I didn't think I was gonna make music anymore. I was just really bummed out about leaving House Of Pain. It was a bad situation. Danny doesn't make no bones about it now but he had developed quite a serious drug problem. We just had to go our separate ways but luckily that's all changed recently, in the last few years. It was my buddy Dante Ross who called me and was just like, what are you doing? Come to New York man, let's make some music. I was like, man, I don't even know what's up with my record deal...I didn't know if I had a record deal, I wasn't House Of Pain no more. Then he was like, fuck all that, just come out here and make music. So I went there and started making a hip hop record. Like, on Whitey Ford Sings The Blues, all the straight hip hop songs got done first, those were done. We were just working on that and I was playing guitar at night.

Flatline: So, did Dante encourage you in that area or what happened?

Everlast, No, Dante heard me playing What It's Like on his couch. I was sleeping on his couch, just bummin' it around, doin' whatever...not cause I had to, just cause I wanted to. Fuck the hotel and all that, let's get down and dirty basics kinda thing. He heard me playing What It's Like and he was like, what the fuck is that? I was like, it's just a song I wrote. Basically, he was like, we're recording that tomorrow. I was like, alright cool, you know? I think at first I might have been like, I don't know what we're gonna do with it but, sure, I'll record it, what the fuck? And that's how the whole thing kinda happened...

Flatline: And you go on to sell 3 million...

Everlast: Yeah, you know...go figure.

Flatline: In my collection I have a ton of House Of Pain remixes. There was almost an albums worth of remixes between the debut and Same As It Ever Was. Was that a group decision to remix and re-work the material or was that more of a label idea?

Everlast: No, cause it was people we all liked. Butch Vig - the label don't think that far ahead dude, know what I mean? That was Danny Boy and me, being fans of "grunge" music and knowing a lot about Sub Pop and the history of that and being like, who would be a good guy...oh, Butch Vig...and him wanting to do it! Diamond D, Pete Rock, those were no-brainers. It was like, hell yeah, Pete Rock, let's have him do a remix, let's have Diamond D do a remix, let's have Lethal do his own remix. It's like whatever's whatever.

Flatline: Salaam Remi did some...

Everlast: Yeah, I remember Salaam, he did a couple. He would always submit remixes for every song. So I'm sure there's remixes I haven't ever heard.

Flatline: That's nuts...

Everlast: Yeah, I'm not the best when it comes to cataloguing or collecting my shit. You know, I'm better at collecting sneakers and shit like that, know what I mean? I don't even have any of my own albums man, it's kinda crazy. On my iPod I don't even have them all. I gotta get them from my keyboard player, he's got them all. I ain't heard some of the House Of Pain stuff in years...

Flatline: I still listen to Same As It Ever Was...

Everlast: That's a good record man...I look back on it...

Flatline: That's the best record you guys did...

Everlast: Yeah. As a group, yeah...

Flatline: And some of Muggs best production is on that record.

Everlast: Yeah, Lethal too. Muggs and Lethal together were good on that record.

Flatline: Same thing when they worked together on the first Funkdoobiest album. That was a great record!

Everlast: Yeah, yeah. I don't know how that one didn't work, how that one didn't blow. It's crazy.

Flatline: I was curious to know if your brush with death brought about a fascination with it. The topic comes up on all of your albums.

Everlast: Well, I wrote a bunch of stuff on Whitey Ford before it even happened, that was about death. But, you know, subconsciously maybe my body was telling my mind things that I didn't know about, you know what I mean? But yeah, I've always been fascinated with death man, now more than ever, cause I'll never be afraid of it really...

Flatline: Because you came that close?

Everlast: Yeah, I mean, I was on my death bed as far as I was concerned. I still trip right now and think, how the fuck am I alive? That's the thing, like I compare it to the world's scariest roller-coaster. It's only gonna be scary that one time. I'm not saying I want death, or I welcome it like I'm looking forward to it. I enjoy my life and I understand what my life is worth. The whole horror of your death - I've kinda run that route already. I have that advantage in a weird way, over maybe somebody who's still got that fear in them. I'm sure there's things I'm still afraid of in certain ways but death really ain't one of them. I don't know if you ever seen that movie Ghost Dog...

Flatline: Yeah, Forest Whitaker, and RZA did the soundtrack...

Everlast: Yeah...they talk about in there, a real samurai reflects on his death every day. That way, when it comes, it ain't a surprise. In a weird same kind of mentality, that's why I do it. I'm ready when it comes. You know, when it comes, it comes. I learned there's nothing that's gonna stop it. We are all mortal. The most invincible of us can be taken down by something the size of the head of a pin.

Flatline: I love your cover of Children's Story that you did with Rahzel. Did you ever get any feedback from Slick Rick on that?

Everlast: No, I would love to have known what Slick Rick thought of that. I know for a fact that he plays Jump Around in his show every night. My buddy Stash sent me a video of it and he's comparing old school and new school. He's like, this is old school and he plays something and he plays something else. Then he says, and this is when Irish people meet black people...boom!...Jump Around comes on. So he must be a fan of it. I'd like to know if he ever heard that and if not, I'd play it for him just to heard what he thinks. I think that's probably one of my best covers just because, if you ask me, it was meant to be a blues song.

Flatline: You've collaborated with a bunch of people on your albums. Is there anyone else you'd still like to work with?

Everlast: Well, ninety percent of the people I've worked with are friends of mine. It's really one of the prerequisites for me. I don't really go, you know, oh that dude's hot, I need to work with him. Most of the things I've done with collaborations have just kind of happened. We were hanging out, in a studio, near a studio, something happened. That's just the way things work with me. I don't plan a lot. It's not in my nature.

Flatline: I'm guessing Snoop and you working on "My Medicine" was just you guys messing around in the studio?

Everlast: No, actually...it's kind of a long story. A few years back I gave him some country music. He was like, I like that Johnny Cash shit, what else can I listen to? I told him Patsy Kline and a few other names. Jump a few years later, we're doing a La Coka Nostra show in New York and I get a call from Snoop that he's finishing up a tour and his last night is in Dublin, Ireland and he wants me to come out and do Jump Around. I was like, fuck it, I'm in New York already, I'll go over there. He was backstage listening to Patsy Kline records and all these old country records and I was like, oh shit. He was like, you were the one that put me up on this Everlast. So jump ahead another few months and we're at the Jam Master Jay Awards. We're at this party for Pharrell's BBC clothing line or something and Snoop comes up to me and says, I want you to write me a country song. I said, you want me to write you a country song? He says, I want you to write me a country song. So, it took me a couple months...and it almost didn't happen cause the day I came up with it, I sent it to him and he's like, we gotta get this today...the record's done, it's getting mastered. So it was the last damn cut for his record and he just loved it and he killed it.

Flatline: Were you frustrated at all with the way Def Jam dropped the ball a little bit on White Trash Beautiful? It seemed like it flew under the radar but contained some of your best work at the time.

Everlast: Well, what happened with that was, Lyor Cohen signed me and then a couple months after he signed me, his friend bought Warner Bros. and he left. So I just got caught in a place where...it's an old story in the music business and it's happened millions of times. When a guy like Lyor Cohen leaves, he takes all his people. Then the new guy comes in with his people. Most of them, if they didn't sign you in the record business, no one's gonna stick their neck out for something. So it was unfortunate, you know? It's one of the reasons I'll never do another record deal again.

Flatline: Kill The Emperor off the new album...

Everlast: Oh yeah...

Flatline: It reminds me of when Paris came out with Bush Killa. How did that track come about? You've really got some stuff to say on that record.

Everlast: It just came out cause I was like, what's the craziest shit about...like, you know, actually taking some kind of action. But it actually came from the thought of like, it I was alive in 1936 and I met Hitler before he became Hitler, would I smoke him? Would I just do it? You know what I mean? So that's kinda where the whole concept started from as a baby idea, and then it just turned into what it is.

Flatline: La Coka Nostra.

Everlast: Yeah.

Flatline: Album done? Ready to go?

Everlast: Album is done, barring one guest appearance we're waiting on via pony express, email, fuckin' FedEx. Somehow, we're waiting on this thing to show up. I don't wanna say who it is.

Flatline: You guys gonna tour behind the album?

Everlast: That's the plan, that's the plan. We're talking about maybe doing a whole Soul Assassins festival involving my band, Ill Bill, Psycho Realm...bunch of people.

Flatline: How did the passing of Johnny Cash affect you? Did you ever get a chance to meet with him or work with him before he passed?

Everlast: No, I didn't get to meet him. I did see his last public performance though. I was working on this Big Daddy movie soundtrack and Rick Rubin was overseeing the whole production of the album and I was in New York. He was like, they're doing this big tribute to Johnny Cash on TNT, they're doing it here in New York. All these artists came and performed and then at the end he came out and performed. I was gonna try and meet him afterwards but there was this crush of people and he was already not feeling well. As much as I would have been cool, it would have been frustrating cause I would have rather met him, if I ever got the opportunity, to just sit down and conversate with him. Same thing with Muhammad Ali. I did some work on that Ali movie, some musical work and at the premiere everyone's trying to meet him. I was just like, I don't wanna be in that crowd. If I ever get to meet him, it'll be on some sit down, yo man, you're one of the reasons I do what I do. I love Muhammad Ali, he's like one of my idols. Well, I don't like using the word idol. Hero.

The new album by Everlast - "Love, War, And The Ghost Of Whitey Ford" - available everywhere 9.23.08
Everlast and The Lordz are currently on tour now. Check your local concert listings for a show near you.

SHOCK G from DIGITAL UNDERGROUND interview

2008-06-02T16:32:00.000-07:00

Flatline: You have been so incredibly creative through out your career, both musically and artistically. Where do you grab inspiraton from?

Shock G: Love. Not just as in romantic love with a woman, but love everywhere in the world around me. People making each other laugh and smile, good times with friends & family, anytime harmony's amongst me, it inspires me. Of course, being in love is the ultimate inspiration too, when I'm lucky enough to have a special someone like that.

Flatline: It's been 10 years since the last D.U. record "Who Got The Gravy?" dropped. What made you want to go one last round with this album?

Shock G: One reason is, we finally came across a good, stereophonic, soundboard recording of a D.U. show, rather than the usual camcorder versions we have so many of. The bulk of this album was recorded at a live show in the bay area. You can hear the hometown luv in the air, and both the audience and the band was in rare form. We didn't bother to include the songs in which we simply rapped over the records. I figured we all know how the records sound already. No, instead we put the "unplugged" sections on the album in which Eric "Kenya" Baker (So Many Tears) is on guitar, DJ-NuStylez is on the turns, Juan Carlos is on percussion, and I'm at my favorite place in the world, on piano. Meanwhile the entire D.U. roster is blessing the mic. All the spin-off acts were in the building too that night - Luniz, Saafir, Element, Choice Cutz, even Strictly Dope, Tupac's original group before he joined digital underground. That's reason one.

Reason two is because, those last 10 years you spoke of, since the "Gravy" album, we've been touring constantly, worldwide, and in that time it sorta seasoned us. Our live show has evolved much tighter then before, and we recruited alot of good emcees along the way too. This album reflects that growth and showcases those emcees. And there's even a third reason...

Reason three for releasing "Cuz a D.U. Party Don't Stop" is because few Pac fans know that our clik wrote the music to practically all of Tupacs singles for his first 3 albums. For instance, So Many Tears was Eric Baker & I musically, I Get Around was myself, Homies Call & Brendas Got a Baby was our homie Deon Evans a.k.a. Big-D the Impossible. In a sense, we were Tupacs in-house band, and I was even supposed to be his music director on his up & coming overseas tour in the fall of 1996. Of course the tour never happened, but you could say this album is a taste of what it might've been like musically, because these are the cats that would've been there. And though Pac may've passed on, we at least have Ray Luv (of Strictly Dope and early ghost writer for Tupac) and Pacs' protege Mac Mall representing in Pacs honor. Plus they supplied me a 77-key Fender Rhodes electric piano that night, so I was in heaven. It's a beast of a recording.

Flatline: There's always talk of you working with Tupac but you worked with another lyrical giant on the last record - Big Pun. How did the two of you hook up and what was it like working with him in the studio?

Shock G: Real talk, on the day we were supposed to record, four plates of spanish food showed up at the studio before he arrived. Then the studio gets a call...it was Pun checking to make sure the food had got there before he showed up (!!!) I heard he was up around 500 pounds at the time. They put a chair in the vocal booth, he layed his verses while sitting down, and we had to punch him in every other sentence, so he could catch his breath. Jeeeesus, the poor dudes heart just couldn't take it any more. He was a great dude though, wayyyyy kool, wayyyyy chill.

I kept thanking him for showin up & fuckin wit our ol' skool asses, and ya know what he said? "C'mon, I had to. You were the first person to put Puerto Ricans on the map when you shouted us in the Humpty Dance."

And ya know what I said?
"Yeah, but you mean Doowutchyalike".

And he said.. "No, it was the Humpty Dance."

And I said.. "Naw, it was Doowutchyalike".

Then he just stared at me like he was trying to figure out whether I was serious or not, and I walked away, back to the soundboard to finish mixing the song. The next day when I woke up, I was like "Damn, he was right! It was the Humpty Dance! He must think I'm crazy!" I was so high from blazin wit him that day, I got stuck in a zone where I really remembered it to be Doowutchyalike!! DOH!

I asked for Pun cause his lyrics were sexually obsessive like mine were. Around that time, most cats rhymed about either crime or violence, but Pun was a ladies man like Humpty, so I thought he'd be a good match with me. And luckily, someone on our label (Jake Records) knew someone at his label and put a call in for us.

Flatline: What can the average listener expect to hear on the new record? Any guest spots we should watch out for?

Shock G: Yes, look out for BINC (a.k.a. Best in Northern Cali), he's hella funny. And also Liz Suwandi, a new female vocalist who's been touring with us lately. We call her "our Fergie".

Flatline: Why do you think Digital Underground isn't scooping up many awards or being recognized for the work you've put in over the years?

Shock G: "Grammys, Emmys, Dammys, nuthin 2 me, but when they rock us in the streets we say ooh-wee."

Witnessing the impact our music has out in the world & universe is like receiving 20 Grammy awards. Things like...when Jay-Z used the Humpty flow in his song, or watching the dancefloor go bananas when "I Get Around" or "Freaks" drops, or watching the girls come alive when they rock us in the strip clubs. (laughs) We're also in the wedding books and the kareoke books lately. We've done two tours a year almost every year since 1989. We may not have any special awards but we're blessed to have what we do have, and for that I'm grateful.

Flatline: Can we expect a solo album from Humpty Hump in the future or maybe an ep with Biz Markie?

Shock G: (laughs) I doubt it, but I'll ask Humpty next time I see him. Who knows, he might be into it.

Flatline: You're a group with a worldwide fan base on a smaller record label. How has the industry changed in your eyes since you came out with Sex Packets?

Shock G: When we came out, hip-hop was still a teeny-bopper (18 years old) so it was focused on all the things teenagers focus on; dancin & partying. But Hip Hop is all grown up now, so it's focused on more adult things like money & business, hence half the people in hip-hop also being business people. The artform is going through all the same changes R&B and Rock & Roll went through. Remember when it was Sammy Davis Jr, Frank Sinatra, Elvis, and Berry Gordy flashin' all the riches? Now it's 50-Cent, Jay-Z, Eminem, and Sean Combs baybay!! Jazz & Rock used to be the music with all the shocking deaths & excesses; Billy Holiday, Hendrix, Elvis, Lennon. Now it's Tupac, Biggie, Jam Master Jay & Eazy-E. Nothin's new under the sun, huh?

Flatline: Any thoughts on the candidates and the election this year?

Shock G: Yeah, I hope the most hicky backwoods republican wins, just to make everything worse so we can finally move on to the next system of government. Capitalism obviously doesn't support the human population very well, or the earths' resources. So it's capitalism itself I'd like to see lose. I guess Obama looks good, he offers a glimer of hope, but we all know ain't nuthin really gonna change with the american mindset unless a major revolution of some kind happens. GC for president!! Clinton or Carlin, take your pick!

Flatline: If Tupac were still alive, do you think he would have left the rap game alone and maybe entertained the idea of politics?

Shock G: I'm not good at the "what if" game, who knows what he may have done? Anything's possible. Hmm, what I do know is, he's NEVER leaving the rap game now, and his art & poetry has always been involved in politics.

Flatline: Will you be taking the new record out on tour?

Shock G: There will be no D.U. tour as we just recently disbanded. 2008 marks our 20-year anniversary (signed our first contract, and recorded our first single in 1988, Underwater Rimes) so we recently did our final show in Vegas, and have disbanded to take a much needed hiatus from the road, our first break in TWENTY YEARS! (20!!!!) Hoorayyy!!

Flatline: Yo! MTV Raps recently celebrated their 20th anniversary and you were there for that amazing period in time. What are some of your memories from doing the show and just that time period in general?

Shock G: I can't remember anything, I did too much ecstacy in the 90's.

Flatline: (laughs) Do you have a particular D.U. album or song that you are most proud of?

Shock G: I like "Sons of the P" with George Clinton and Pee Wee from the Dangerous crew. We freaked that shit!! Um..."digital Lover" is pretty cool too. Lots of open space in that song, just like Snoop's new jam.

Flatline: What does the future hold for Digital Underground?

Shock G: Can't know untill it happens. In the words of the immortal Fiona Apple...
"If there was a better way to go, it would find me.
I don't know, the road just rolls out behind me."

The new Digital Underground album will be available May 27th on iTunes, Amazon.com, CDbaby.com and stores everywhere! Go get that!
myspace.com/therealshockg myspace.com/humptyfunk

- Flatline for Rapstation.com

DEL the FUNKY HOMOSAPIEN interview

2008-06-02T16:27:00.000-07:00

Flatline: Who approached who for your move over to Def Jux for the new album? It seems like a match made in heaven since they heavily promote loads of creativity.

DEL: Well, I guess you could say that I was looking for a home to launch this 11th Hour project from, and they had an opening. I know El-P from a ways back, we cool. I really respect his artwork and also his drive that got him where he is now with his Def Jux thang. Plus I know Mr. Lif too, that's my folks, and he seems to be doing good with Def Jux so that kinda let me know that was a safe bet. And so far so good, I'm loving it, they looked out and I been doing what I can to make their job of getting 11th Hour out there to the people easier.

Flatline: Who are some of your favorite emcee's?....particular artists that you listen to, as an emcee, that completely blow your mind lyrically.

DEL: Right now? Well, there's alot of them, for different reasons, but I would have to say that, outside of Hiero, Redman is someone who particularly speaks to my demo graph. Also cats like De La are all time favorites, Q-Tip, the JB's, these are cats who constantly I can count on. But I like other stuff too, for instance, The LOX and especially Styles P have been one of my favorites for years. All of the Wu of course I love, Ghostface of course as well as Raekwon always kills it. But I also love Pete Rock as an emcee, too. Diamond D is one of my all time faves on the mic, always witty and always drops a gem or two. Andre The Giant is a favorite, matter of fact just say DITC. But Lakim Shabazz is one of my favorites too, as well as JustIce. KRS ONE of course and Chuck D as well. It's too many to name, I love all the raw dope emcees who keep it really fly with the lyrics for different reasons, but the main reason is the funkiness and the ability to spit something real every once in a while.

Flatline: I know you weren't happy with "The Best Of..." that Elektra put out a couple years ago - but getting to finally hear "The Undisputed Champs" with Q-Tip and Pep Love was amazing. What was it like getting down with Tip in the studio?

DEL: Q-Tip is truly one of my favorite dudes, man. I'll never forget how cool he was to me when we first met, he really embodied that spirit of HipHop that I thought EVERYBODY in HipHop would be like before I got into the game and really peeped it ain't all like that. Tip is someone whom I've always related to very closely. We have similar paths and I could always tell from listening to his lyrics, but when we hung out the few times that we did I could see that it was a vibe that was all over, they just did it in a NYC style, we did it in a Oakland Bay Area style. But it was all peace and I think we were both starting to just get a feel of that.
Tip actually was real cool, cause he would look out for me. That's why anytime dudes try to say he ain't the shit no more or try to call him out, say whatever about whatever without even listening to the shit...actually, by watching him, I knew how some dudes would just turn on you. Cause I seen people do it with Tribe before even listening to their new material. Their album was the Love Movement, the LOVE MOVEMENT how could people front on that? And the music was a new direction, J-Dilla included in it. Some dudes fronted and now look, J-Dilla is they hero now that he's dead. But when he was alive they were frontin, without even a listen really to base they hate on. I'm goin off, but I got respect for Tip, man. Cause he a real artist and he tries things, even when it turn out sometimes dudes front at first, he still willing to try.
Now, about the studio session. I actually was so obliterated I don't remember much. I drank basically some concoction consisting of 2 40 oz, mixed with gin and orange juice. Don't ask. Anyway, I was obviously dumb loaded, but Tip didn't badger me about it. I had a box of SP1200 disks I brought out. I was letting cats peep what I could do production wise. Tip dug it. Busta Rhymes came in, I know him from Elektra, LONS, Dinco was my man, he was dumb cool too, as well as Busta. But anyway, Busta is like peeping my heaters and he like nodding, like "Yo, these are pretty good, son!" It was nice to get that love from the East Coast cats cause it started there. They made me feel like "Ok you ill, we'll accept you into our shit."

Flatline: You've rhymed on side projects with Handsome Boy Modeling School, Gorillaz and Deltron 3030...any other super group plans in the works? I heard the sequel to Deltron will be coming out in 08 as well.

DEL: I don't know if I like the title of "super group"...seems to set up alot of anticipation only to be ultimately let down because for some out there the expectations will never be met. COULDN'T be met, it would be impossible to live up to the fantasy conjured up by some dudes. BUT...I am always trying to collaborate with real cats when I got the time to. El-P and Tame One are two that I'm working on getting crunk. A-Plus as well. Dave from De La, Prince Paul. Another Deltron of course. But also I'm working with D-Stroy, working something out with my man Pumpkinhead...alot of things, but you know, it takes time and some things are first priority. There's a Hiero album being finished up now. Basically I never stop working on stuff, I even have instrumental dance albums, funk stuff, rock stuff, punk stuff, I stay making stuff.

Flatline: "11th Hour" was produced almost entirely by yourself. How long did it take for this album to finally come together after all this time?

DEL: Once I was able to raise up out the game of the mentally insane (those who look around in the streets for someone to blame), it actually didn't take that long, but I must admit I was conceptualizing this LP for quite awhile, ever since Both Sides had ran it's course. I knew I had to learn more about music in order to take it to the next level, whatever that may be. And I worked on my Funkentelechy so I would be able to funk harder than before.

Flatline: Back around 96 or 97 I saw you and the whole Hiero crew tear it up live. Is the art of performance dead in hip hop these days?

DEL: I wouldn't exactly say that, because HipHop IS performance, it's based upon how well you perform. The live setting is where it all starts and it looks like where it will end up in this era of record labels finally losing almost all of their power over consumers. It's anarchy right now, and there's alot of jaded people who feel they been burned and won't even give anything new a chance, it's too late. It's that game again that I was talking about earlier. But all the doper cats know: you gotta be able to command attention. No matter if you got dancers and mega-props on stage or you just standing there streetsweeping with the lyrics. People wanna be entertained, how we as artists get to that point is all up to our preference and what we are best at. But the presentation we deliver will be judged based upon our personal performance, HOPEFULLY, anyway.

Flatline: Were you a fan of Radiohead before Amplive came along and got you to spit on "Videotapez"? The end result is really dope.

DEL: I have a few Radiohead LPs, I have always dug their bag, man. They do what they do and they do it well, you can't really front on them for any other reason except you just don't like them. Because they are doin it. Videotapez I did for Amplive primarily cause he asked me to be down with the project, but I also knew that it could get me a little pub. But really I did it cause Amp is my patna and he asked me to.

Flatline: It's been an interesting road for you since you debuted back in 1991. What keeps you motivated musically and lyrically?

DEL: Musically the curiosity that leads me to continuously try to explore new ways to organize music is motivation enough in itself. But also the personal feeling of gratification and achievement I feel from being able to do something well and being able to see my own growth on a continuous basis is motivational for me, and I would assume for anyone else in a similar dimension.

Lyrically, the motivation is primarily the need to speak about things that I can't get anyone to listen to any other way BUT in a rap. I'm a funky dude, meaning that I walk around in a funk alot of the time. I don't bug cats with it, I'm not a drag, you dig? I just put it away. Rapping is one of the ways I can let some of that funk free, and it's a safe way, a creative way that'll entertain people who feel the funk like I do. It also lets me aim that funk at targets in a basically harmless manner, it's just a rap dig? If it get people to pay attention then fine, and that may hurt some people's feelings but there's no name tag on the rap. If it's dug it's dug. Music is the other way I can express funky feelings in a way that lyrically I can't do. So lyrics and music work hand in hand.

- Flatline for Rapstation.com

EFF being HARD, Posdnuos is COMPLICATED

2007-12-09T21:07:00.000-08:00

WELL ALRIGHT THEN. The blogs seem to pop up whenever, but when they do - READ. The next big thing...actually, I'm not gonna tell you just yet...let's just say it involves BALLZ and your PURSE. Handbag, clutch, over the shoulder...whatever. It's ALL FAIR GAME. You have been warned. So I went to a party last night. Say word. Homie don't really do parties. I haven't been to a PARTY in many many many years. Eons ago. I get really uncomfortable. Anxiety uncomfortable. Sure enough, felt it last night - big time. Then...much to my surprise, I overcame it. I faced it, dealt with it and shot it down. I'm proud of myself. Baby steps equal big steps. The party was cool too, pour me another Bacardi and Coke...I'll drink it. I drank it. I ammm. I didddd. I wassss. I played DJ for a bit with the iPod and ended up with a TOTO on each leg...how do these things happen???? Clearly I am still recovering. Clearly my fly little Puerto Rican from The Bronx can SHAKE THAT. Hell to the yeah. Clearly I've gotta shout out Kevin and Stacie cause I got to hang with them again and that made me happy. Clearly, Kevin has an issue that will turn itself into one of the biggest things WORLDWIDE. Myspace? Old news. Facebook? What's that?? Again, you have been warned. Consider yourself (all 7 of you) lucky to receive such highly guarded information. I feel like I've been typing for a good 30 minutes now - it's been about five. Moving right along party people in the place...the new Scarface album and the new Ghostface Killah album are fantastic. It's amazing how Scarface is able to still come with it 20+ years in the game.....and it's unbelievable how GOOD Ghostface is at this point in his career. He's got to be the SHARPEST emcee doin' it right now. He can make the most simple subject matter sound like the flyest thing you've ever heard in your life. I tried to find some lyrics online but no such luck. Trust me - "The Big Doe Rehab" is a great album. Get that, get "Made" by Scarface and you're set. I think some little muthafucka named Lupe Fiasco has or is releasing his second album. I got a middle finger for him and his lack of respect for A Tribe Called Quest. My copy of his album was pawned with a quickness, that's like poison in my collection. Is this blog over yet? So tired. Going to bed at 2am will do that to the kid. Need to catch mad zed's...play some zed catch up. Oh, and Celine Dion's new album got...drum roll please...ONE effing star in the new issue of Rolling Stone. THAT is a BEAUTIFUL fooking THING. My heart will go on. Alright, I'm signing off but with a quick reminder before I leave - stay fly, all day, every day.......

HIT ya LIKE a LYRICAL MURDERER

2007-12-02T18:32:00.000-08:00

I know you think I have, but yo, I never heard of ya! The tree is up, the roses are on the table and party people in the place, it is time once again to get on down! Sometimes, one must wake up at 3am and watch a True Life marathon until 5am. It happens...especially if you're battling a cold like I am. It tried to make an appearance late Wednesday. Battling, battling, winning, losing, winning, losing. I'm sick, I'm not sick, I'm sick, I'm not sick...I'm sick. So annoying. Since I ran out of Jack Daniel's, I have resorted to Absolut New Orleans. Alcohol kills germs, right? I got'em. It snowed like a MUTHA this weekend, dumping a solid eight inches where I was at. Cuckoo for cocoa puffs. Ever watch that show Intervention on A&E? Brutal. Not always a happy ending. Same thing with some of those True Life episodes that they do. I can't believe it's December already. I can't believe I'm sick. I can't believe how lucky I am to have a fly little Puerto Rican from The Bronx to take care of me when I'm not feeling well. She cooks me amazing things too - blackened tofu, beans & rice, crazy silly good garlic bread, pasta, salad - she hooks it UP. I'm going to get her a cooking show. The F.L.P.R.F.T.B. Cooking Show. Coming soon. It's so freaking cold. Having not been home all weekend, I returned to my MEAT LOCKER of an apartment, switched on the heat, and quickly made my exit, going to get some gas (hate you George W) and some Taco Time. The veggie wrap is gone and yet...I crave more food. Didn't really eat today, not much of an appetite. Although let me assure you, I ate plenty yesterday. Appetites come and go. So do good hip hop posse cuts. When was the last time you heard a really, REALLY good one? Here's the last really good one I heard - Craig Mack featuring The Notorious B.I.G., Rampage, LL Cool J and Busta Rhymes. They put it DOWN on the Flava In Ya Ear remix. "Don't be mad, UPS is hiring". Deadly. I caught a video for a great posse cut tonight - DJ Khaled featuring Young Jeezy, Ludacris, Fat Joe, Rick Ross, Big Boi, Busta Rhymes, Lil Wayne and Birdman. While I'm not a fan of everyone on there, everybody put it DOWN - especially Luda, Big Boi and Busta - they tore it UP!! While I'm babbling about hip hop, new Scarface and Ghostface Killah albums are out this Tuesday. You can NOT go wrong with either one of those dudes. I've been listening to Scarface's "The Fix" album in anticipation of his new joint...and I can conclude that "The Fix" is now a top 20 of all time album for me. One of the most soulful hip hop albums ever - you FEEL it. Now me and my Absolut are gonna go chill and rest and kick this damn cold to the curb. You continue on, doing whatever it is you're doing. Oh, and make a note of it - stay fly - all day, every day.....

187 with MY BLOG in ya MOUTH

2007-11-26T20:42:00.000-08:00

Like we always do about this time! 3 blogs in a row, 2 days of silence and back up in here once again. I'm amped off some wonderful hip hop news - RBX and MC Ren are finished up an album together. RBX has been M.I.A. for a minute and when I last spoke with MC Ren, he was planning to drop a new solo album, then he planned to work with Paris on a project and then...he retired. Not the case. This is gonna be some straight WEST COAST hip hop - hardcore, ruff, rugged and raw. Now if only that DJ Quik and AMG album would get a release date, the WEST WEST could really be back on top - a true resurrection...just until Dre releases DETOX, then, it's DRE DAY alllllll over again. Off of the hip hop babble we go and into some babble about a restaurant I frequent often - Red Robin. I like their food - in particular, the different Gardenburgers I can get with different combinations of stuff. YUM. I still wish the seasoning for their fries was actually cooked INTO the fries, but you can't always get what you want. (wow, lots of CAPS tonight) So, I'm thinking that Red Robin did a survey with 100 people and the results of the survey have your server now saying the following: "Hi, welcome to Red Robin, have you been here before?" YES. "Oh, that's great. Welcome back." Really muthafuckaz???????? People don't just wander off the street and into a Red Robin cause they're curious about how their mixologists make the drinks or, gee honey, let's go some place ROMANTIC tonight - maybe we should try out that place down the road, Red Robin I think it's called? BULLSHIT. It's stupid. It's got me upset. I'm calling the manager. ~on hold~ 2 minutes have passed ~still on hold~ Okay...so the manager says that the servers are required to say that. I told him it's odd. He said he was sorry. My job is done here. Moving right along to....how freaking cold it is in Seattle right now...how I feel like I'm in a MEAT LOCKER when I wake up in the morning. (not a good feeling, and definitely requires all caps) The Passat told me it was 37 degrees this morning...THIRTY SEVEN DEGREES...with a little snowflake beside the temperature. I do not want it to snow here...again. Last year sucked with the snow and I'm really not trying to drive around in all that. Yet, I feel like it is our destiny. I just wanna know why it's so cold. What happened to global warming? I would like warmth please. I'm about to light my speakers on fire for heat. SPEAKING OF SPEAKERS...guy and his girlfriend pull up next to me near Southcenter with my dad and Max in the car. "Hey! Hey, want a set of speakers? They're not hot or anything, I got them from work cause we were overstocked." Really? Who does that? They are HOT and you ARE shady. I've been crazy way before radio didn't play me. I got the best pictures of Max over the weekend. I think I will end things off here with one of my favorites and if you go to Red Robin and they ask you that ridiculous question, tell'em you have never been here before and that you didn't even know the place existed. Ask them to tell you the history of Red Robin and what their mission statement is. Do they give back to the community? Do they put MSG in their food? Cause let me tell you something - they put SOMETHING in there - how else can you explain my addiction to that place?? I get the shakes if I don't go for over two weeks. I joke. I sign off. I go watch the television. You read the blog. YOU stay fly, all day, every day.....

EDITION not ADDITION fool

2007-11-23T20:48:00.000-08:00

I sat down, fingers on the keys, posture not so great...ready to BABBLE. When suddenly it hit me. Something's not right! I raced out of my room and into the kitchen. No signs of smoke but the emergency signal was definitely ringing in loud and clear. The solution to all this panic - Absolut New Orleans poured over ice. Got your heart racing a bit, didn't it? Terrifying...kinda like what I'm about to sit here and blog about. No agenda means ideas and random thoughts all over the damn place. Pause. Sip. Carry on. I ventured out into day after thanksgiving sale shopping chaos people acting retarded to save 5 bucks day with Max. We got gas at Costco...I hate you George W...and then, instead of heading to Target like we had planned, we ended up going to Coulon Park over in Renton. Beautiful park, Max loves it there. I should mention that my car (ahem, the Passat) is very clean right now and almost every time I go to Coulon, tradegy strikes via birds from above. We head out into the park which, for whatever reason, is not getting any sun...the ground is frozen. I drink down my mocha in about 2 1/2 minutes. It warms me...then I feel sick. Play at the park for probably 45 minutes and then head back to the car to inspect the damage. Nothing. Zip. Zero. Nada. HOORAY. Off we go in the still shiny automobile listening to Class Of 3000 by Andre 3000 from Outkast. Unexpected random babble - Prince has a new single on iTunes called F.U.N.K. and it sounds damn good. Back to the babble. Max wants something to eat so we stop at Burger King and get him some chicken and fries. He's happy, I'm happy, we head back to the car to head over to Target. GASP!! WWWWHUT?!!? What in the.....?!?!? The birds. The birds moved shop and hang out at the Burger King parking lot in Tukwila. Little fuckers - I don't even eat your cousins and nephews and great aunts and shit. SHOW SOME RESPECT! Target was busy but not crazy busy like I thought it would be. I parked as FAR AWAY as possible, next to the Target sign actually...which of course, PLEASED ME. We also checked out Circuit City after Target but found nothing. From there it was time to go home and chill. Did I mention I couldn't feel my hands when we left Coulon? True story. How I love you heated seats. You make me so very, very happy. Max's grandpa is coming into town tomorrow - could potentially pump the blog writing brakes, but you know, I'll see what I can do. This is three blogs in a row isn't it? I'm like a blog writing COMET right about now. OH...and I bought one of my favorite childhood into adulthood movies today - THE GOONIES. I sat down with Max tonight, telling him he's gonna love the movie and this and that and it's so cool and he's all excited to see it. So then, within 5 minutes of the movie starting, Chunk says "shit". And Max repeats it. So now I'm dreading what's coming next. More "bad" language for a 5 year old, including two more "shit's" after the first one in the five minutes after that. Dammit Steven Spielberg. So I switched it off. I didn't want to. I really, really didn't want to. He's just gonna have to wait until he's 10 to see it - the same age as when I first saw it. WORD. Is this muthasucka getting kinda long and pointless or what? Perfect opportunity to just....KEEP GOING! Or not. I select not. Still, it's on and poppin' - and do I need to remind you? STAY capital F-L-Y...all day, every day....

I MAKE ya FEEL LOST like HIGH SCHOOL HISTORY

2007-11-22T20:56:00.000-08:00

Stickabush...stickabush. Happy thanksgiving from your Canadian on America soil. I don't celebrate Canadian thanksgiving as it always passes me by without notice. And while I don't "celebrate" American thanksgiving either - it is absolutely a day for me to reflect and take that extra minute or two to really recognize and give thanks to people in my life. For the next 4 days it's just me and Max rollin' solo and I give thanks EVERY SINGLE DAY for having that little boy in my life. No matter past circumstances, he is nothing but pure GOODNESS, a wonderful little child with endless potential. Watching him grow by leaps and bounds makes me PROUD in every single fucking sense of the word. You won't find a parent much prouder than myself. World's proudest father is in the BUILDING...holla!! Just to go off track for a minute, cause that's what I DOO if you're just tuning in, I have completely spaced on RAVING about Jay-Z's "American Gangster" record. He was inspired to write it and record it after seeing a rough cut of the film, but what he ended up doing, is making the best album of his career. I've never been a Jay-Z fan...always thought he made better singles than complete albums. THIS JOINT is a complete ALBUM...and if you take a look around the wasteland called "hip hop" right about now - NO ONE is making an album that plays from start to finish anymore. So big up to Jay-Z cause the dude is a monster...check that live VH1 special if you don't believe me where he ran through almost every track over the course of an hour. Now where was I? Oh yes...giving thanks. I give thanks for April 16th, 2007 where my life was completely turned upside down in the most amazing of ways. Do you believe in love at first sight? Let's just say I really don't believe I'd be here or be in the kinda mindframe I'm in without MY FLY LITTLE PUERTO RICAN FROM THE BRONX. I can endlessly rave about her...I do every day...ask her. But I am just SO thankful that she came into my life when she did. What we share is really, TRULY special...untouchable, unbelievable...I pinch myself constantly. Upgrade 2007 til infinity. So THIS is what love is all about. Alright then. THANK YOU for you. When I talk to you on the phone, send you text messages, when I see you next week, I'll thank you...over and over again. To my man Champagne, The Warrior Of Chaos, Brian, T-Diggy, SamMan and Serafin...you have all held me up and held it down for me in one form or another. Thankful for you all. To Kevin & Stacie, to Mommy - you are such amazing additions to my life and have welcomed me with open arms. Thank you. Tonia (hey hey hey) my little chocolate drop - you've got my back quite like no other and I wanna thank you too. I should thank Emma (age 4) and Reese (age 3) as well since I'm pretty sure both of them are probably able to read this. I heard Emma is working with Stephen Hawking on a new edition of A Brief History Of Time and Reese is going to contribute as well with illustrations. How nice. This blog has gotten a bit personal and I hesitate to post but thanks again to all and take that extra minute to thank some of your peeps. Two blogs within 24 hours and the hits just keep on comin'. Time to chill with this glass of Absolut New Orleans and to remind you to stay fly, all day every day.....thank you.

IT TAKES TWO to MAKE it OUT OF SIGHT

2007-11-21T20:53:00.000-08:00

I wanna blog right now. I know it's been a HOT MINUTE since the last blog. For the seven of you reading this, it must seem like an eternity...like when X-Files was really popular and there would be months inbetween new episodes. The truth is out there. The truth of the matter is, I tried to write a blog last weekend, but I wasn't on my own computer, my keyboard...and never knew, until that moment, that it actually makes a difference. Down to BIZNESS. Last Friday night I saw Rob Base (no DJ E-Z Rock), Naughty By Nature and Coolio. Rob Base was pretty bad, Coolio was really bad (the crack is back) but it was like Nineteen Naughty III all over again when Treach and Vinnie took the stage. OPP, Everything's Gonna Be Alright, It's On, Uptown Anthem, Hip Hop Hooray, Craziest, Guard Your Grill, Feel Me Flow...they ran through them all, with passion...not even close to going through the motions...and you know they've performed these same damn songs for 10-15 year now. They brought it and I was a happy man. New album coming in 08. Oddest moment of the Naughty set - Treach pouring cognac over the Tupac tattoo on his arm while saying the following...(and I wish I had an audio clip)..."When I drink, you drink. When I smoke, you smoke. When I fuck, you fuck"......ooooo-kay there Mr.Treach. Last Saturday me and my fly little Puerto Rican from the BRONX chilled until late afternoon when it became time to get our sushi ON. So damn good. Wasabi Bistro - best sushi in Seattle. Their sister restaurant, Red Fin, has a great atmosphere, but you can NOT beat Wasabi's rolls. HELLZ to tha NO. Don't even try it, you might cause a riot, what the radio won't play, the underground will supply it. Ice-T quote from Squeeze The Trigger off Rhyme Pays. Random hip hop quotes happen to the best of us. Embrace it. Embrace beer. Kevin and Stacie got a garage full of it and I was lucky enough to sample it and sample it and sample it and sample it on Saturday evening, while taking in an amazing comedy routine that lasted a good 3 hours. (damn that was a HELL of a run-on sentence there Baird) The brat is asleep...I repeat, the brat is asleep. I'd like to shout them both out for a great evening. The war of the iPod's rages on. Winner yet to be determined but DAMN if I wasn't THRILLED OUT OF MY SKULL when selections from Buhloone Mind State by De La Soul started popping up. Really...all seven of you....okay, all 6 cause Stacie's got it....you must have De La Soul's third album in your collection. You may see 3 Feet High & Rising and De La Soul Is Dead on various top 20 lists of all time but the one, and I mean THE ONE you've got to own is BUHLOONE MIND STATE. Stickabush...stickabush...stickabush...stickabush. Sunday/Monday will now be known as the infamous 48 hour hangover...I don't want to talk about it. But let's talk about this - it's Wednesday night....and there's a blog here. For the next couple days I will check in with more ramblings than you can imagine. Maybe not that many, but I'm planning on more over the next 4 days. You have been warned. New episode of Project Runway in 45 minutes from now best reality show on tv - period. I sign off now, only to return again in another 24 hours. When I sign off, you sign off. When I blog, you blog. When I say you stay fly, you STAY FLY ON THE REAL TO REAL....

GANGSTA GANGSTA that's WHAT they're YELLIN'

2007-11-04T19:50:00.000-08:00

It's not about a salary, it's all about reality. Can I get an extension on the weekend please? Another 48 hours would be good for me. Please and thanks. Met up with dear friends Brian & Guy on Saturday and got my hair cut by Toyo - little Japanese man with some SERIOUS SCISSOR SKILLZ. His technique is unlike anything I've ever come across. I was in awe the whole time and walked out very happy. My fly little Puerto Rican from The Bronx and I hopped into the back seat of Brian & Guy's new CLS (which is freakin' GORGEOUS) and we headed off to Ray's to grab a late lunch and drinks. Checked out Tiffany's afterwards and then grabbed some more drinks. Martini's for this kid all day long. WHUT?! Today, with the time change in full effect, we headed off to Macy's and the mall to look at stuff and then took in the 1:10 showing of AMERICAN GANGSTER. Oh, you're gonna wait until next week to see it? Oh, you're gonna wait until it comes out on dvd? Mark my words when I say that is one of the finest pieces of filmmaking in 07. Denzel and Russell came through with some SERIOUS a-game. Also some nice cameos in there from Fab 5 Freddy and Anthony Hamilton in one of the clubs scenes. Check for RZA in there and watch for his giant WU-TANG tattoo on his arm. Dope. Common and T.I. both seemed a bit under-used but held their own during their brief moments of screen time with Denzel. I am fascinated with true stories like this, where the character sets up and establishes his empire, gaining all this money and power, only to have it all taken away from him, everything crumbling in the end. You've really gotta see it - yes, YOU. All seven of you! The Amazing Race starts in 60 seconds. I will continue to type like a madman for your reading pleasure. Oh, and Jay-Z's "American Gangster" album is out on Tuesday - never been excited for one of his albums until now. Actually, not true - his Unplugged album is incredibly dope with The Roots backing him up. I'm a hustler baby, I just want you to know. I ain't where Stacie's been, but where she's about to go. BIG SHOUT OUT for not holding back on that trick bitch. Truly. Capital T to the R-I-C-K beeeeotch! We don't love dem hoes...and I definitely don't love anyone who is gonna come at you and your family all twisted like that. Best believe I got your back. It's like that, and that's the way it is. Damn that new Britney album is good - SAY WHUT?! It's Britney bitch. Break it down...break it down...break it down...break it down. It's frightening how it's stuck in my head the way it is. DOO DOO DOO! Alright look, I would write more but with The Amazing Race and America's Most Smartest Model on at the same time, I've got some serious flipping back and forth between channels to do. Wish me luck and on the real to real - STAY FLY...all day, every day.......

DON'T MOVE muthafucka! DON'T MOVE!!

2007-10-31T20:13:00.000-07:00

This ain't gonna be one of those blogs where I'm all chipper and shit. Clearly, the first sentence says it all doesn't it? Read on. I've had a fucked up day. Start to finish - fucked. And guess what? You're about to read about it! Or swing on over to eonline.com and check something there. Travis drink (number two) in hand, let's go! Met up with the apartment peeps regarding a neighbor cranking the SHIT out of The Transformers movie last night. When I can feel the bass and hear the dialogue in my living room, we've got some muthafuckin' ISSUES. They will be dealt with. And can I get some peeps to change a lightbulb in the elevated ceilings? I only called LAST MONDAY. That'll be dealt with on Friday. Hip hop hooray. I need to figure out my living situation within the next month - that ish has me stressed. More than I really wanna get into right now, let's move on. I took the day off today and got to take Max to school for the first time. Such a big boy, walked him in and he went down the hall to his classroom by himself. The changes going on with him in the last 30 days alone are absolutely mindboggling in a good way. Doesn't mean there's not issues. He is shy (like his dad) and doesn't really talk much when peeps come at him. We had a long talk about that this afternoon after he basically ignored or said very little to peeps at my work. (we stopped by, he likes daddy's work) We spent the afternoon over at Pacific Science Center which was like a ghost town. I highly recommend you bust over there if you've got kids on a Wednesday afternoon. You can hear yourself think, you don't trip over kids who aren't being watched - it's great. I don't need to go into great detail over the next item cause it will do no good but make me fucking pissed off all over again. In review "fuck you" via the phone and text summed it up very nicely. Oh, and if you happen to be someone who fucked me over a year ago and then you call me up a year later being all chipper and fake and shit, you can catch a bad one. You may also come collect a "fuck you" as well. I've got an endless amount, especially tonight. I'm really not one to be fucked with. To put the cherry on top of my day of hell, Max was chased down the driveway of my complex by a dog who was not leashed. SECOND fucking time it has happened. Max was scared out of his mind (as was I) and I went talked to management immediately. He will also be dealt with. If it happens again, I've got a FUCKING BRICK with his dogs name on it. Try me. I do NOT fucking PLAY when it comes to my son. You will catch a fucking bad one. So tonight, chilled on the couch watching Animal Planet (Max's new favorite) and......DING DONG.....who could that be? The dog's owner? The Transformers neighbor? No. My fly little Puerto Rican from The Bronx here to save the day and my SANITY. I close off here with the biggest smile on my face. The most wonderful things can happen when you least expect them. Believe that....and STAY FLY dammit........

THOOOM bizotches

2007-10-28T20:58:00.000-07:00

What a beautiful weekend. If you were in Seattle the past two days, you know this to be true. Why is our fall nicer than our summer? I saw The Nightmare Before Christmas in 3D on Saturday. Max loved it. What an incredible piece of filmmaking, truly some crazy ass creativity going on there. As much as I like Pixar and some of the other animated things for kids, that claymation and stop and start action going on is leaps and bounds better. Call me old school - it will be taken as a compliment. That also brings to mind James & The Giant Peach - another masterpiece which I'll introduce to Max soon as well. Max is zedding away, I'm doing some laundry and I start flipping through channels, landing on MTV Cribs. Now, some people on there, you know their stuff is paid for, they're making crazy amounts of ca$h. You see someone on there like Brooke Valentine who had one hit and yet, somehow, has 2 Benz's and an Escalade - you gotta question what's going on there. Answer: she's got roommates. Yup, that's not gangsta. And while I'm at it, if you catch the episode, take off those damn hoops that are bigger than your fucking head. I breathe in, I breathe out. Really, not something to get worked up over. Six in the morning police at my door, fresh Adidas squeakin' cross the bathroom floor. I was listening to Ice-T this morning. "OG Original Gangster" is still, to this day, one of the best damn hip hop albums ever. I'm rollin' in the damn Passat, reciting every line, word for word. I was there for the filming of the "Lethal Weapon" video in 90 and saw him again with Body Count in 91. Ask anyone, he's the one (or at least in the top 3) of people I'd like to interview. Rakim and KRS ONE would round out the other two. Back to the Passat for a minute - had it all washed up on Friday. Woke up and had that morning moisture, that morning DEW if you will, on all the windows. Do I use my wiperblades to get that DEW off of there? Hell to the no. I wipe that off, dry that off, get that all shined up. No lines, no streaks, no mess. I ain't havin' it. I may not drive a Benz, but I do treat my Passat like one. I am borderline crazy. You have all been warned. American Gangster with Russell and Denzel is coming out on Friday isn't it? That flick is gonna be crazy good. If you are a Cingular customer (will peeps stop calling them that now that they're AT&T?) I wonder if you know that the clocks didn't really change last night. There was no falling back, that happens next weekend. What UP? I'm with T-Mobile and apparently I really DO get more cause they didn't change the time on my phone. The time on my G4 changed though. You win some, you lose some. But somewhere, right now, there's someone who didn't hear the news and they'll be early/late for something tomorrow. I laugh out loud with glee. Borderline crazy, remember? Not crazy like THE HULK but borderline something or other. My p-p-p-posse from the Bronx is THICK...! Ever do something you swear you could never do and then, out of the blue, you're able to do it? Good feeling isn't it? AMAZING. Straight up and down, this is some all over the fucking place rambling. Everyone still with me? I feel like I need motion sickness pills just writing it. Bacon tastes good, porkchops taste good. Pulp Fiction should be released in audio form. Bizarre that it's not. Must I come up with all the good ideas on my own people?? PEOPLE!! Alright, these eyelids are getting heavy (yes, I know it's only a bit after 9) so I will close off here. If I could somehow hand out those little bags that you throw up in before each blog I would. This kid needs to rest. Very sleepy. Very much ending it off here cause it's just how we doo. Straight up, if you're really come through, might wanna come fly, and stay fly and just BE FLY...all day, every day......YA HEARD!

MARINATED bloggidy GOODNESS

2007-10-23T19:15:00.000-07:00

It's Britney bitch. Shout out to The Warrior of Chaos. BOOYA. Ever lose touch with someone that you thought was one of the coolest, nicest, most talented people you've ever met? And then, one day, they show up in your inbox after around 12-13 years of no contact? That happened to me today. Mr.Dorey (aka: X-ian) is alive and well. We go back to high school, shared a love of music...Public Enemy, Paris, Consolidated, Meat Beat Manifesto...and both of us were definitely on the artistic tip coming up. You can get with this, or you can get with that. I just wanted to shout him out as well - it is DEFINITELY a beautiful thing being back in contact. Much respect. I'm just getting over a cold. I woke up with it on Friday morning with its claws well into me and there was no fighting it. I'd say I'm sitting at a comfortable 90% better now with a full weekend (and Monday) of rest. Take THAT. During my weekend of rest I became addicted to a few terrible shows - America's Most Smartest Model http://www.vh1.com/shows/dyn/americas_most_smartest_model/series.jhtml . . . Keeping Up With The Kardashians http://www.eonline.com/on/shows/kardashians/index.jsp?sid=nav-shows . . . and The Real Housewives Of Orange County http://www.bravotv.com/Real_Housewives_2 . . . which I think was a marathon of season one. All guilty pleasures and great to watch while on Tylenol Cold and Jack Daniels. I'm just coming through with that marinated bloggidy goodness...what more do you want from me? Back to Public Enemy for a minute, the Paris produced "Remix Of A Nation" ( www.guerrillafunk.com ) hits stores today. SUPPORT THAT! Also, the new PE video went up today over at www.publicenemy.com for "Black Is Back". Originally they wanted to sample AC/DC for the track but they couldn't obtain the rights. These things I know. I also know that waiting in a McDonald's drive-thru for 10 minutes with only one car in front of you is not right. That's why I let dude at the window know...and without cussing. So proud of myself. Can't have Max saying "you're a muthafuckin' bitch" to his friends in kindergarten. Not a good look. Just in case you haven't seen it written all over my face - I am madly in love with my fly little Puerto Rican from The Bronx. BX is in the BUILDING! What more can I say?! I'm so proud of my little man, he fits the very definition of EXCEL. He's writing letters and coloring and drawing pictures of me and him and it's just SO amazing to watch. He's only been in kindergarten for a month and half and it has been such a positive thing for him. Oh, and November 4th in Seattle - Rakim, Ghostface Killah and Brother Ali. To go or not to go, that is the question. To see the R, the fucking 18th letter just RIP mics in half LIVE would be incredible, Ghostface is solid and Brother Ali's latest confirmed that he's one of the few still carrying the torch for hip hop. Ponder young man ponder. Ramble young man ramble. So while the blogs may be few and far inbetween at times, I'm still here, doin' it, head above water, forward motion, keep movin' and movin'. Forward motion, stay fly and STAY FLY.....

BOOGIE DOWN volume EIGHT

2007-10-13T17:40:00.000-07:00

Cru - GOIN' DOWN
"It's goin down...boogie boogie down...boogie boogie boogie boogie down...down down down..."

Lady Sovereign - LOVE ME OR HATE ME (Jason Nevins remix)
"If you love me then thank you!..."

The 2 Live Crew - ME SO HORNY
"Im like a dog in heat, a freak without warning...I have an appetite for sex, cause me so horny..."

Marc Anthony - PARECE MENTIRA
(translator please)

Salt N Pepa - LET THE RHYTHM RUN
"Is it over yet? Never, it gets better...we'll let the rhythm run harder than ever..."

The Notorious B.I.G. - HYPNOTIZE
"Never lose, never choose to, bruise crews who...do something to us, talk go through us..."

Mya - MY LOVE IS LIKE...WO
"I hope you have an appetite...so tell me, baby, will you come and spend the night..."

Fugees featuring Bounty Killer - KILLING ME SOFTLY (remix)
"Yo Mona Lisa, could I get a date on Friday..."

Montell Jordan - THIS IS HOW WE DO IT
"So tip up your cup and throw your hands up and let me hear the party say...I'm kinda buzzed and its all because...this is how we do it..."

Busta Rhymes featuring P.Diddy & Pharrell - PASS THE COURVOISIER part II
"I said Busta (whassup son?)...you leave them girls rollin... and it look like (c'mon)...they asses is swollen..."

DJ Shadow featuring Chris James - YOU MADE IT
"So we crawl out from under...the water...out of darkness..."

Foxy Brown featuring Method Man - ILL NA NA
"True Absolut vodka, straight shots...for the has-beens and have-nots, dolla dolla...real and it don't stop, we movin up...first the mansion then the yacht, sound proper..."

Mariah Carey featuring Jadakiss & Styles P - WE BELONG TOGETHER
"It's our time right now, more than ever...til the death, we gon' get it on together..."

Domino - SWEET POTATO PIE
"It's like this...I'm that guy, you're so fly...gotta get a piece of that sweet potato pie..."

Christina Aguilera - CANDYMAN
"He's a one stop, got me hot, makin' my "uh" pop...(sweet, sugar, candyman)...he's a one stop, get it while it's hot, baby don't stop...(sweet, sugar)...."

Missy Elliott featuring Eve - 4 MY PEOPLE
"Make me grind my hips, make me move my waist...when the music comes on, you take my breath away..."

LL Cool J featuring Boys II Men - HEY LOVER
"Swimming in the timeless, currents of pure bliss...fantasies interchanging with each kiss...undying passion unities our souls..."

Beyonce featuring Jay-Z - CRAZY IN LOVE
"It's the way that you know what I thought I knew...it's the beat that my heart skips when I'm with you..."

J.J. Fad - SUPERSONIC
"You see, the 'S' is for super, and the 'U' is for unique...the 'P' is for perfection and you know that we are freaks..."

Raphael Saadiq - STILL RAY
"Night is where I find you and peace of mind...my days are filled with glee...that's why I truly give you what you need...because you love me for me..."

ELECTRIC RELAXATION

2007-10-10T21:14:00.000-07:00

Once again, it's been a minute. These blogs are starting to marinate over a week or two. Don't know what to tell you except that IT'S LIKE THAT...and THAT'S THE WAY IT IS. I'd like to big up Absolut for creating Absolut New Orleans - mango and black pepper flavored vodka. All proceeds from the sale go towards Gulf Coast charities. Get yourself two bottles. Then, drop Absolut an email asking them why they don't have any drink recipes for it on their website. Still, over ice is nice and the flavor is really wonderful. www.absolut.com Did anyone watch the VH1 Hip Hop Honors show on Monday? Good stuff...mostly. Missy was honored much too early and Snoop being honored before Dre is crazy.....nothing comes out when they move they lips, just a bunch of jibberish and muthafuckaz act like they forgot about Dre. I like'em both but it's like they cut in line before some other people in the game and/or VH1 just got lazy. A Tribe Called Quest getting honored was HUGE. Phife, a diabetic, is in need of a kidney transplant YESTERDAY. I was shocked and saddened to see him looking so ill. I really hope he's okay. A Tribe Called Quest to me, really, is absolutely top 5 group of all time material. Who's a better group who released sooooo much incredible material? The first three albums are CLASSIC. Word is bond. People's Instinctive Travels And The Paths Of Rhythm, The Low End Theory and Midnight Marauders are ESSENTIAL. Beats, Rhymes & Life and The Love Movement round things out nicely although hurt a bit due to the sampling laws that came into affect after their 3rd album. Doesn't take away from the fact that they're one of the dopest groups ever. So since they are so good, you'd think some of these younger emcee's would recognize and show respect. Lupe Fiasco can catch a bad one. I'm done with dude. He came out for the Tribe tribute and forgot the classic verse, then went on to say that he's never even listened to Midnight Marauders and never will and that Eightball & MJG put out better stuff. REALLY?? He just shot his entire career (what's left of it) right in his FACE. Not his foot. His face. He will not recover. Kanye can't save you now you little bastard - he gave away all his good beats to Common and didn't even save any for his wack ass third album. CATCH A BAD ONE. I saw Transformers with Max and he loved it, as did I. Even though it's a bit different than the cartoon I grew up on, that is one monster of an action flick. A 180 from that is the new David Cronenberg film, Eastern Promises, starring Viggo Mortensen and Naomi Watts. Good movie, which has stayed with me since Saturday on the brain, and GREAT performance from Viggo. It's been compared to The Godfather which is a HUGE stretch, to say the least, but it's got LEGS and I'm hoping for a sequel. Why are my eyelids suddenly so heavy? Oh yeah - Absolut New Orleans. GET YOU SOME!! Clearly I didn't have anything of major importance to babble about so this would be the perfect blog. Why are my sentences coming out so funny tonight? Is it just me? I'm closing off here and there's nothing you can do to stop me. Keep this mind, right there at the forefront of your cranium in big letters, all caps - STAY FLY, ALL DAY, EVERY DAY....

BOOGIE DOWN volume SEVEN

2007-09-29T19:17:00.000-07:00

Rozalla - I LOVE MUSIC
"Nothing can be better than a sweet love song...so sweet so sweet so mellow mellow...when you got the girl that you love in your arms...oh honey I love you I love you yeah..."

Run DMC - RUN'S HOUSE
"Some underestimate, and miscalculate...my intent to create what I call the great..."

Kelis featuring Nas - IN PUBLIC
"Don't try to run from me...I'll make your toes curl up and make your body scream..."

Talib Kweli - GET BY
"I let them know we missin you, the love is unconditional...even when the condition is critical, when the livin is miserable...your position is pivotal, I ain't bullshittin you..."

The Verve - LORD I GUESS I'LL NEVER KNOW
"Tell me, who do you see when you die in your dreams?...tell me, who do you touch when you --- in your dreams?..."

Blaque - BRING IT ALL TO ME
"There's not a single question that we can't make this right...cause it's you I need every day and night..."

Gang Starr featuring K-Ci & JoJo - ROYALTY
"I'll open up the door always before you pass me...baby doll, because you're royalty..."

De La Soul featuring E.Yummy - SPECIAL
"It's gotta be you, it's gotta be right...no time for games, it's gotta be tight...I just want this to be special, special..."

Joss Stone - GIRL THEY WON'T BELIEVE IT
"Girl they won't believe it...I finally found some sweet through the bitters of life...ooh ooh girl they won't believe it...in a world where the sun's even shining inside..."

Yo-Yo featuring MC Lyte - ONE FOR THE CUTIES
"One for the cutie, two for the cutie with the big D..."

Robin Thicke - TEACH U A LESSON
"U feel so good...U smell so good...U feel so warm...just like I knew U would...I can't let u go..."

Black Sheep - THE CHOICE IS YOURS (revisited)
"Back, middle, to the front, don't front...wanna good time, gonna give you what you want..."

Deee-Lite - SAY AHHH...
"All day in my mind I replay the 2nd time we chimed...so sweet what a treat sensuelle...skin on skin is swingingly swell..."

John Forte - NINETY NINE (Flash The Message)
"Subway sparks after dark...flash the message: something's out there..."

Gwen Stefani featuring Pharrell - YUMMY
"I’m feelin yummy head to toe...you see me...ain’t got no patience so let’s go..."

Pharoahe Monch featuring Apani - THE ASS
"The ass!...the ass!....the ass!....the ass!..."

Oasis - WONDERWALL (acoustic version)
"I don't believe that anybody...feels the way I do about you now..."

READ it LATER. YOU are HALF ASLEEP.

2007-09-27T21:05:00.000-07:00

It's like that...and that's the way it is. Sippin' on hennessy and you know it's all good. Warmed to the core and I'm feeling just fine. I sit here, in the dark, trying to make out the letters on the keyboard, knowing that if I concentrate hard enough, I actually might write something of importance this evening. Sometimes you need to pause, take a second...just take a second. Listen to the little voice in your head. You know what mine is saying? Refill on the hennessy please! Besides that, as much as life is a struggle sometimes, everything's gonna be alright...alright. Material possessions aside, how happy are you right now? Me, on a scale of 1 to 10, I'm closing in on 10. I wanna feel that pure bliss and know what I need to do to get there. The feelers are out. Stacie has my back like WOW. I've got an amazing support system in place. I think everyone knows it's about to happen. The time has come for bigger and better things in life. I don't wanna struggle anymore. I just wanna be COMFORTABLE. The kid wants to be comfy. Get ya comf on. Now, to totally switch up topics for a sec - if you are sick and coughing and sneezing and you come to work, I would love to throw you down a flight of stairs or just take you out to pasture. NEIGH biznotch. Now back to our regularly scheduled program - I am SO HAPPY. Life has done another 180 on me. You read my last blog, about my time in my city with my fly little Puerto Rican from the Bronx. Think that's a one time deal? Think things aren't always that great? Guess what?...things are all that and then some....except when you spill a Travis drink all over the couch. That's a two minute time out right there. Penalty on the kid from Canada. Drop and give me twenty sucka. I went running for the first time in about nine months last night. I psyched myself up, got the new Public Enemy "Remix Of A Nation" going on (available online now for download, in stores in October) and just hit the street. 100 miles and runnin'. The 25 minutes I was out there felt like an eternity. The pain I feel in my entire body today is reeeeee-dic. I wish I had never stopped but I got it going on now. A little run here, a little run there and I should be good. I'd like to give a shout out to mommy. Oh mommy, 10 years in the making and tomorrow is the big day. We'll be thinking of you - all will be very very well. Oh, and why had I forgot about "Army Of Me" by Bjork? Damn that's a great song. True dat, howudoodat?! My boy was a mess tonight like I have never seen. I picked him up from the community center after work and he wants a toy. I say no - tears. We get home - more tears and whining for 25 minutes. I should have just left him there and went for another run! I joke. Always joke. Joke all the time. Got him calmed down from the 25 minute crying/whining session and then he starts up AGAIN!! Don't know what the deal is but wasn't diggin' on that at all. Another drink for the father typing the blog please. Thank you. I used to watch The Office. I think the second season of The Office is some of the best television I've seen in recent years. Why am I not watching the one hour season premiere tonight? TV is a waste of time and money. Television, the drug of the nation, breeding ignorance and feeding radiation. Disposable Heroes Of Hiphoprisy quote for those keeping score. Damn, I am all OVER the place tonight. GOOD. Oh, and that new Kanye West is the biggest disappointment of the year. But the good news - Milk Dee from Audio Two is working on a new solo album. SAY WORD. Did I ever even talk about the MTV Video Music Awards? I don't think I did. Clearly old news and clearly the worst television ever beamed into my home. They're still talking about Britney. Too high, can't come down. Alright, that's all I got. I'm gonna find a picture of Britney from when she looked good and post it with a big smile on my face. My girl could teach her a lil' something. A little somethin' about staying FLY - all day, every day.....

HENNESSY...HENNESSY...(but I am still THIRSTY)

2007-09-23T19:10:00.000-07:00

It's like I've been on a blog-cation...on a beach somewhere, unavailable to type randomly and at great length. Or I smashed my fingers inbetween some bricks and have been unable to type with little plaster casts on each finger. Even the Warrior Of Chaos chimed in with "write more blogs dammit". I am sorry to have let all six or seven of you down. However, I am back from a weekend away, and even though I am thoroughly exhausted - BLOG I SHALL. Where was I? I was with the love of my life in my city - VANCOUVER. We went up on Friday night after work, stopping along the way to visit the hometown of the cousins of the Insane Clown Posse (Everett) and then we quickly kept it movin' after devouring some Taco Bell. Grilled Stuft Burrito. YUM. Oh, and who knew that Hockey Night In Canada actually moved and is now Hockey Night In Everett? That might be a joke only for myself, unless you're a hockey fan and grew up in Canada. I move on. The border was a breeze with the border patrolman taking a slight jab at my fly Puerto Rican from the Bronx. Oh, but be warned, that bush over there may not be a bush at all - it might be a giant microphone. TRUST NO ONE. We arrived at our hotel downtown which you can look at here - http://www.sheratonvancouver.com/facilities.cfm?page=faq - 18th floor, corner room, floor to ceiling windows. AMAZING. The city looked absolutely gorgeous lit up. We made our way downstairs to the bar where George Carlin was playing piano. He wasn't. But if you had the drop of vsop that I did, you might find it funny too. Switch over to Saturday morning and I'm wide awake at 6:30, so amped to BE THERE and to also look out the floor to ceiling windows. I do. I take many pictures, one of which is at the end of this babbling. It was supposed to rain the majority of the time we were there. Did it once? NO. Sunshine for Saturday and Sunday - it must be a sign. We got some Starbuck's in the lobby (how convenient) then made our way out into the city on foot. We walked ALL DAMN DAY on Saturday. Maybe not all day, but for a good 6-7 hours...it felt GREAT. We went down to the waterfront, got some amazing breakfast at the Goodfellas Cafe and walked over to Canada Place to take in the view from there. We went down 1 Missing Limb Lane in search of my spot and we found it. Seymour Street used to be home to Track Records and Odyssey, my two favorite record stores on the planet. They've been gone for years, but I can't forget driving into downtown on my lunch, parking in the alley, grabbing some music, and then heading back to class. Yes, my music addiction runs DEEP. It was almost 11:30 in the morning by this point - time for a drink. Where should we go? Where should we go? Then it hits me, let's go up in a terrifying elevator ride to a revolving restaurant so we can see EVERYTHING. Thanks to an earlier suggestion from the ever-trusty Weesha (thank you!) we go here: http://www.topofvancouver.com/ and get our late morning drink on. You drink, then you shop, so we did Robson Street and checked out some unorganized cd shops on Granville and then went in search of a liquor store. None to be found. We head back to the hotel, get the car (hi baby, I missed you) and go in search of booze. SUCCESS. Back at the hotel we mix up some Travis drinks (T-DIGGY!!!!!) and then head down to the pool to soak in the jacuzzi. The Sheraton is top notch, no question about it - but the bath house steam room? Not so much. After getting our soak on in the hot tub, we head back up to the room to rest and to get ready for dinner here: http://www.ouisibistro.com/ (thank you Lisa Gale!)...and it was AMAZING. The food, the drinks (I love you peppermint patty martini), the people - outstanding. The bartender fills up my Hennessy XO just a little shy of where it shoud be, the owner comes over and agrees, gets it filled up PROPER...then, out of nowhere, delivers two glasses of port to enjoy with our pecan pie which was INSANELY GOOD. Go now. Go there now. Why are you still reading this? Flash ahead to Sunday and we're out again by around 9, driving over to Stanley Park, thinking that the Tea Room will be open for breakfast and it's not. We end up driving around the park, then heading back to the hotel after the FRUSTRATION OF TRYING TO FIND GAWD DAMN PARKING IN THE CITY OF VANCOUVER where a stupid PERMIT IS NOT REQUIRED!!!!! Annoying Vancouver. Very, very annoying. We eat average over priced eggs, then head back up to the room to nap the morning away. The perfect ending to the perfect weekend. You wanted a blog? You got one. Oh, and guess what? We were in a parade on the way home. Yup, the Everett people don't know how to fucking drive Parade. It was GREAT. But in all seriousness, my weekend was amazing - we had the BEST time. Shout out to George Carlin, wherever you are. Signing off from the 2nd floor, wishing I was still on the 18th with the floor to ceiling windows and my fly little Puerto Rican from the Bronx. Sooooo DAMN FLY - all day, every day.......

5-0 said FREEZE...and I got NUMB

2007-09-09T20:05:00.000-07:00

It was one of those beautiful days in Seattle today...the kind of day that demands a little time spent in the Passat with A Tribe Called Quest's 2nd and 3rd albums - The Low End Theory and Midnight Marauders. Those aren't in your collection? GET ON IT. I am sitting here, finally recovered from Friday evening. Friday evening consisted of (Travis) drinks, martini's to celebrate Mommy's birthday, and then after dinner drinks consisting of a substance known as THE DEVILS DRINK. Don't know what the devil's drink is? Didn't know the devil was bottling up and selling this substance to the masses? No? Allow me to fill you in. The devil is the maker of CHAMPAGNE. Yes, champagne. Now you could say, ohh, it's just cause you mixed or ohh, it's cause you're a lightweight or ohh, it's cause you're Canadian. No. That's not it. Champagne is manufactured and produced and marketed and promoted by...THE DEVIL. I was hung the FUNK OVER for a solid 24+ hours. Never in my life have I been THAT messed up. Never. Champagne is the devils drink. I have decided that water is from the lawd. LAWD LAWD LAWD. So happy birthday to MOMMY. I had a great time hanging with you and my fly little Puerto Rican from the Bronx and a late night, beer in a paper bag appearance from Stacie. She told me to go do the Mary Kate or the Kate and Ashley. I listened. Thank you. The end. My sister came into town yesterday and in my hung over state I managed to make it over to Red Robin to meet her for lunch at around 2:30 in the afternoon. WHAT does Red Robin PUT in their FOOD?? WHY do I feel like I have eaten TWO gardenburgers instead of ONE when I walk out of there? WHO actually takes the dessert menu and ORDERS something off it when they're done? I don't get it. I pace myself, I drink plenty of water, I don't rush and I walk out completely STUFFED. I must further investigate. Perhaps it's something in those fries...or perhaps, just perhaps, Red Robin is a chain of restaurants OWNED and OPERATED by THE DEVIL!!!!!!! He's following me everywhere I go...or perhaps he left town yesterday to go visit Britney Spears in Vegas to completely FUCK UP her performance at the VMA's? I'll find out for myself just how BAD it is in about 39 minutes from now. Right now, I think I'll close off here, but before I do - CONGRATULATIONS to my man THE WARRIOR OF CHAOS and BETH, who got married in Vegas last weekend. AMAZING. All the VERY best to them. I raise my glass of water to you, and in the future, we must celebrate properly. Bartender, a refill on this water please, and make it a double. Thank you kindly. You know the drill, carbs or no carbs, so FLY...all day, every day....(YAY!)

WANNA WATCH the first TEN minutes of "300"...?

2007-09-04T21:20:00.000-07:00

My neck is KILLING ME! And as soon as I begin, I stop - I desire a drink. Please hold. Yes, much better. Blueberry vodka, champagne, cranberry juice, shaken up into a chilled martini glass. Damn I made a good one!! WOW. If I could somehow share this with all six or seven of you, I would. Useless musical fact - Robin Thicke (who is now MAYJAH) was on the remix of Will Smith's "Switch" single. But two years ago listening to that, who would have known who he was. He was the long haired son of Alan Thicke who had that one single that was featured in a...Verizon commercial? It's not good when the only play you're getting is on a cell phone commercial. Can't front on the kids sophomore album - The Evolution Of Robin Thicke is really a great album from start to finish. How does it feel, to know that I love you babe. How does it also happen that Rolling Stone gives the new Prince album 4 1/2 stars, calling it the best pop album of the year and Blender gives it 1 1/2 stars? Either way, I'm curious and been meaning to pick it up for a minute now. Damn I love lazy Monday afternoons. Who else could it be but me? Oh damn, just quoted Will Smith and there was a reason why I brought him up in the first place. On "Switch" he says "don't download, go out and buy the record". Really Willy? I get the illegal downloading thing, I get it...but if some kids download your ish are you really gonna be hurting for cash? At this point, he should put his records out for FREE, dude has so much money. Switch!...ooo-la-la-la. That's a damn good track from Will's best solo work "Lost & Found"...but remember, don't download, go out and buy the record. Please let me state FOR THE RECORD that I am the proud proud father of a little boy named Maxwell who just started KINDERGARTEN today. Tomorrow, he will take THE SCHOOL BUS...and hell to the yeah I'm still freaking out about it a bit. (part of the reason why I needed this damn drink) He had a great first day and seems like everything went well. I just admire him and look at him and I'm totally wow'ed by him. He's the most amazing little boy, so brave, so smart, ready to take on the world. He's growing up so fast and I'm just SOOO SOOOOO proud of him. He's my little man and I love him like no other. Keep your fingers crossed for the bus ride...they do that ish every day right? They're professionals, right? RIGHT. Drink up dammit. Shout out to mommy. Hi mommy! We had the best Indian food last night, I was so stuffed afterwards I could have died. It was THE BEST. The flavors just blew my mind. SO GOOD. Thank you mommy. I love you. Did you know that I am typing this while Big Brother 8 is on? I am. I was SO into it and then something happened. The magic was lost...they air it three times a week...they air it three times a week at different times.......I just can't fucking keep up. It's frustrating. Fuck you CBS. You think you'd be nice to the viewers and have a normal set schedule since no one is watching your crappy network anyway. CSI? Really? Still on? I'm surprised they don't run Dr.Quinn Medicine Woman and Touched By An Angel back to back. Hit me off with that marathon in prime time son...WHUT?!!? Blame it on the alcohol yea yea...you can blame it on the alcohol...doo dooooo. (this kid is crazy!) Really? Right there? 3-ish in the afternoon? LAWDY. My neck still hurts yet it has become strangely numb. Thank you Smirnoff. You're good...but Absolut is better. Would you please POST this muthafucka already? MY GGGGGAWD. Neigh neigh! Let me remind all six or seven of you, if you're gonna do it and you're going about it and you're into it, please always remember - STAY FLY. All day, every day. You just don't KNOW!! On the real to real - F to the L to the Y........it's a WRAP....

BOOGIE DOWN volume SIX

2007-09-02T15:35:00.000-07:00

Rakim - NEW YORK (YA OUT THERE)
"We got clicks for wreck, we like pits for pets...we got giants and jets, the knicks, yanks and mets...we like much respect and sex extra wet...and hi-tech dialect you ain’t catch yet..."

No Doubt - MAKING OUT
"So I'm just kicking it, I'm counting the days, I hardly can wait, for us to hang out...I'm really missing it, in so many ways, I anticipate us making out..."

Eve - TAMBOURINE
"Pop dem bottles, yea drink dat up man...got you feelin crazy, yea dat was the plan..."

Joss Stone - TELL ME BOUT IT
"Tell me ‘bout it...tell me how I feel...how you feel...and if the feeling’s real...feeling’s real...tell me what’s the deal, hey hey hey..."

Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince - BOOM! SHAKE THE ROOM
"Work the body, work work the body...slow down girl, you're 'bout to hurt somebody..."

Robin Thicke - LOST WITHOUT U
"I’m lost without u...can’t help myself...how does it feel...to know that I love u baby..."

Busta Rhymes featuring Janet - WHAT'S IT GONNA BE?
"Every time, we crossin' the borderline...we givin' it to you, makin' you feel fine...turn the heat up...better believe we gonna shine...make your body wind...baby, the pleasure is all mine..."

The Mary Jane Girls - ALL NIGHT LONG
"Oh, something’s got me so delighted, baby...I see your face in everything I do...you got me shook up, shook down, shook out on your lovin’..."

DJ Kool featuring Doug E Fresh & Biz Markie - LET ME CLEAR MY THROAT (remix)
"Zig-zag, zag-a-zig, zag-a-doo-doo-da...no matter what I say it always comes out fly...the ladies in here who like zoodeloo-pop...I'm in love, I'm all shook up..."

Chuck Berry - YOU NEVER CAN TELL
"But when the sun went down, the rapid tempo of the music fell...c'est la vie", say the old folks, it goes to show you never can tell..."

Kylie Minogue - SLOW (Chemical Brothers remix)
"Our eyes connected...now nothing's how it used to be...no second guesses..."

Lady Sovereign - THOSE WERE THE DAYS
"Stayed out till it was pitch black...sprayed my name on concrete slabs..."

Lumidee - NEVER LEAVE YOU
"Now all your loving that...we're happy it's a fact...can't nothing hold us back...we got this in the bag...there ain't no maybe...no questions, love you daily now..."

Ol'Dirty Bastard - SHIMMY SHIMMY YA
"Ooo baby, I like it raww...yeah baby, I like it rawwww!..."

Johnny Cash - RING OF FIRE
"Love is a burning thing...and it makes a fiery ring...bound by wild desire...I fell into a ring of fire..."

R.A. The Rugged Man - ON THE BLOCK
"Yo, at the roller rinks, no skates on...early 80s, girl chase on...Kurtis Blow the breaks on...Flavor Flav, Public Enemy clocks, boom box...EPMD made us proud that we was from the Boondocks...

Groove Theory - TELL ME
"Tell me if you want me to...give you all my time...I wanna make it good for you...cuz you blow my mind..."

Richard Ashcroft - YOU ON MY MIND IN MY SLEEP
"The symptoms are too deep...I got you on my mind in my sleep...you on my mind in my sleep..."

Justin Timberlake featuring T.I. - MY LOVE (Mike D bass remix)
"I can see us holding hands...walking on the beach, our toes in the sand...I can see us on the countryside...sitting on the grass, laying side by side...you could be my baby, let me make you my lady...girl, you amaze me..."

TWO BLOGS in ONE DAY?!!?

2007-09-01T21:07:00.000-07:00

THAT KID...is back...on the ESCALATOR AGAIN!!!!! Go watch Mallrats. Brilliant. Kevin Smith in his finest hour as far as I'm concerned. YOU KNOW WHAT?! THERE IS NO EASTER BUNNY! Over there, THAT'S JUST A GUY IN A SUIT! doo doo doo....and cut. Need to get one thing out of the way real quick. To all you muthafuckaz on eBay claiming that you're selling genuine, real deal article shit and then you deliver and it turns out to be just the opposite with things falling apart and not fitting right...you're gonna catch a bad one. Maybe not now...maybe not even tomorrow...but soon. You deserve it. I wish nothing but the worst for you in life. And cut. Sippin' on another one of those damn blueberry martini's. It's gonna give me a damn headache, I know it. I mixed up some Bacardi Razz with some Coke Zero (tasty, no matter if it'll give you cancer) and it was quite good. I think I'm just attracted to the black can. I don't care that it has zero sugar and zero calories, it's all about that black can...and the fact that the ish tastes good. I was actually drinking that up as I consumed three tacos and one burrito this evening. Thank you lord big baby jesus for my high metabolism. May it continue on for years and years. In ODB's name I pray. Amen. WU TANG! WU TANG! It's the WU tang-tang, for everybody! Raekwon's "Only Built For Cuban Linx 2" should be a MONSTER of an album...the production line up alone makes me drool. Dr.Dre, RZA, JDilla, Erick Sermon, DJ Scratch and freakin' MARLEY MARL. Really, truly, if this album is as good as I think it will be - WU TANG CLAN ain't nuthin' to EFF wit. Pause...sip...delicious. Had an eventful, yet non-eventful day with Max. The sun was shining down where they said it would rain so we swung by the community center where he'll be taking the school bus from (yes, still a bit nervous) and also went by his school and played on the playground for a while. Hit up Target, with the REST OF SEATTLE, and got him a new backpack for school and a lunch bag. Exited Target to discover a minivan parked over the line and into MY FUCKING SPOT. I don't create all that room next to an extra spot so you can be all up in my Passat's grill ya fuckin' knucklehead. I don't like door dings. I have NONE. I'd like to keep it that way. Rant over and a big F you to that bastard not knowin' the time. CATCH A BAD ONE. And cut. I tried out my mocha as non-fat for a second time today and can now conclude, without a single doubt in my mind, I would rather EAT DIRT. Sorry, I just can't help it. Maybe have them make it with 2% instead of whole milk? I dunno. All I know is, homie don't play that. Can you believe it? Two blogs in one day? And check this out - I'm even more in love today than I was yesterday and the day before that...and it has NOTHING to do with Coke Zero. Drink up kiddies. The place is here and the time is NOW. Gonna go download some Raekwon right now I think...in the mood for a little WU this evening. True dat and HOWUDOODAT?! From right to left....and cut. This is it. It's a wrap! Three little letters make up the perfect word. F to the L to the Y. All day, every day. Endlessly.......FLY.

BOOGIE DOWN volume FIVE

2007-09-01T12:49:00.000-07:00

Nas featuring Lauryn Hill - IF I RULED THE WORLD
"Could it be, if you could be mine, we'd both shine...if I ruled the world...still livin for today, in these last days and times..."

Johnny Cash - I WALK THE LINE
"As sure as night is dark and day is light...I keep you on my mind both day and night...and happiness I've known proves that it's right...because you're mine, I walk the line..."

De La Soul featuring Zhane - 4 MORE
"And you're figurin we love on the rock...I'ma keep it up front to maintain the stock...displayin all the goodies from your knuckle to knees...make it hot like the island degrees...now that's special..."

Busta Rhymes - TOUCH IT
"(Get low Bus!) and as we started, got me ringing her bell (uh huh)...when I come I be doin it and doin it well (uh huh)..."

Maroon 5 - SHE WILL BE LOVED (acoustic version)
"Tap on my window knock on my door...I want to make you feel beautiful...I know I tend to get so insecure...it doesn't matter anymore..."

Pete Rock featuring CL Smooth & Denosh - IT'S A LOVE THING
"You're beautiful, the way you wear that, share that...had many ladies, but nothing can compare to that smile, that style that drives men wild...that ring could have big daddy walkin' down the aisle...proper, you a show stopper, girl a jaw dropper..."

Maxwell - GET TO KNOW YA
"I gotta get to know ya ...when you want I'm right here baby...longin to know ya..."

DJ Shadow featuring Q-Tip and Lateef The Truth Speaker - ENUFF
"I'm tryin' to get closer than close til you're a part of me...extension of spirit and soul..."

Ashanti - HAPPY
"My love is sooo good...that I wouldn’t be without ‘cha babe...couldn’t see me without ‘cha babe..."

Dr.Dre & LL Cool J - ZOOM
"All I wanna do, is zoom-a-zoom zoom zoom...(mmm, whatchu wanna do) Uhh, whatchu wanna do?..."

Dusty Springfield - SON OF A PREACHER MAN
"How well I remember...the look that was in his eyes...stealin kisses from me on the sly...takin time to make time...tellin me that hes all mine..."

Camp Lo - SPARKLE
"And it don't stop to the midnight...this glass got me right...only live lo light...don't drown in the mo dawn...on to the disco,
sisco got me laced...scorch a half a quart, then E&J get chased..."

Prince - IF I WAS YOUR GIRLFRIEND
"If I was your girlfriend...would u let me dress u...I mean, help u pick out your clothes before we go out...not that you're helpless...but sometimes, sometimes...those are the things that bein in loves about..."

Brother Ali - EAR TO EAR
"Feeling fly as hell right about now...I done pushed a whole heap of hell out of my house...any orphanage will cloth and feed a kid...but I raise my little man, teach him to live..."

Michael Jackson - REMEMBER THE TIME
"Do you remember the time...when we fell in love...do you remember the time...when we first met girl..."

Everlast - HOT TO DEATH
"Front to back...right to left...keep it live all night...make it hot to death..."

Deee-Lite - APPLE JUICE KISSING
"Kissin by the streetlight...don’t want to say goodnight...swooning, practically spooning...boom! moon was never so ripe...moment never so right..."

The Smiths - PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET ME GET WHAT I WANT
"So please please please...let me, let me, let me...let me get what I want...this time..."

Masta Ace featuring Jean Grae - HOLD U
"No Wait! When I hold you if feels so great...I realize and recognize that you're my soul mate...it's us forever had to let you know...it's like I told you imma hold you never let you go..."

Alicia Keys featuring Adam Levine - WILD HORSES
"You know I can't let you slide through my hands...wild horses couldn't drag me away...wild wild horses couldn't drag me away..."

TOO...TOO...TOO much POSSE

2007-08-31T22:14:00.000-07:00

The horse show was in town today. NEIGH bizotches!! Just when you think it couldn't get any uglier, it DOES. Didn't those bastards at Starbuck's raise their prices about a year and a half ago? Why in the HELL am I now paying almost THREE DOLLARS and FIFTY CENTS for a tall mocha?? I must either a) get coffee elsewhere or b) just kick the habit altogether and drink some water or some tea or something. I'm done with the whole milk too. Whole milk, really?? Why do they even offer it? Oh wait, that's where they hide the CRACK that makes me come back again and again no matter what the price is. How do you people sleep at night??? I have had quite the week which has morphed itself into a big ball of stress, and as of this evening, another g'damn pimple from hell. Stacie, next time I see you, I'll hit you off with a 50 spot. Bastard things. So Max is starting KINDERGARTEN and he's very very excited, as am I, after checking out his classroom and meeting his teacher last night. He's going to do SO well there...they learn how to freaking READ in kindergarten now. Crazy, but crazy good. The stress comes in because of him, being five and little, having to take the bus on the days where I have him in the morning. I will drop him off at the community center near my place, he'll hang out there for a bit and then they'll put him on the school bus. No biggie right? Wrong. He has to transfer buses. He's FIVE! I'm 32 and I don't like to transfer. So I'm obviously very concerned and wanting to throw up my delicious lunch (which was so good, it also doubled up as my dinner) whenever I think about it. They do this all the time...they do this all the time...it's what they do...it's what they do. It's like a little chant that I'm going to have going through my head on repeat for the next week. I know he'll be fine, it's just freaking hard on me. So that's where I'm at in the land of stress/pimples from hell....or did I get bit by another spider cause the bite on my forehead didn't do the job? Who knows. I am also overwhelmed a bit with life in general, basically stressing myself out for no good reason. I know what needs to be done and I'll do it. Plain and simple, end of story, solution granted. Sometimes when I write these blogs I feel SO much better at the end - this is one of those times. I'm all over the place but bear with me. Bear witness to the lyrical fitness...biznitches! COPYRIGHT PENDING. I got that new Camp Lo album. For those that don't have it or just don't know, Camp Lo's debut "Uptown Saturday Night" is one of those crazy underrated almost classic albums. Download it. iTunes awaits you. The new album has them teaming up with their original producer Ski (who has also worked with some dude named Jay-Z) and it's some quality stuff. Gotta get some more listens in. Check for that new Talib Kweli album too. There's just something about a parking garage at 5:05. Lemme post this sucker up and run off to catch some much needed mad ZED's. This is how we do it. You might wanna play catch up if you're just joining us. Otherwises, eyes to the sky, look at the clouds making letters, it says - SO FLY............

BOOGIE DOWN volume FOUR

2007-08-28T21:31:00.000-07:00

Method Man featuring Mary J Blige - I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU/YOU'RE ALL I NEED TO GET BY (Razor Sharp Mix)
"Like sweet morning dew...I took one look at you...and it was plain to see...you were my destiny..."

Next - TOO CLOSE
"Yeah boo, I like it...no, I cant deny it...but I know you can tell I'm excited, oh girl..."

Missy Elliott - I'M REALLY HOT
"Baby can't ya' tell...I lick my lips like I'm LL...and I'm doin' it, and doin' it, and doin' it well..."

Fabolous featuring Ashanti - INTO YOU
"I really like what you’ve done to me...I can’t really explain it ...I'm so into you..."

N.E.R.D. - SHE WANTS TO MOVE
"She makes me think of lightning in skies...(her name) she's sexy!!...how else is god supposed to write...(her name) she's sexy!!..."

Lupe Fiasco featuring Jill Scott - DAYDREAMIN'
"Daydream...I dream of you amid the flowers...for a couple of hours...such a beautiful day..."

DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince - LET'S GET BUSY BABY
"I'm losin my mind, but it's not lost yet...I'd pay a thousand dollars just to see your sihlouette..."

Gwen Stefani featuring Akon - THE SWEET ESCAPE
"If I could escape...and re-create a place in my own world...and I could be your favorite girl...forever, perfectly together...tell me boy, now wouldn't that be sweet?

Pete Rock & CL Smooth - SEARCHIN'
"You're everything that I dream about, talk about...walk around and brag about, cause I don't give a damn about...what they say, what he say, or she say...I'm addicted like drugs to your loving, but hey..."

Remy Shand - THE WAY I FEEL
"Who are we to fall to pieces baby...worked so hard to see things through (see it through, see it through)...who are we to question each other mama...I know what it takes to make it right for you...it's the way I feel..."

LL Cool J featuring LeShaun - DOIN' IT
"Damn I love it when you talk like that...make it bounce sugar...long as you can bounce me back..."

Busta Rhymes featuring Pharrell - LIGHT YOUR ASS ON FIRE
"See the police gon jail ya...for walking around wit the kind of ass that'll kill ya now..."

Foxy Brown featuring Blackstreet - GET ME HOME
"Cross the room throwin signals, I'm throwin em back...flirt-in cause I, digs you like that..."

The Perceptionists - LOVE LETTERS
"I saw you and immediately started to trip...it's like I realized for the first time what beauty was..."

Ginuwine - I'M FEELIN' YOU
"I'm spendin time & I'm thinkin 'bout...all of the times that I do without...and now your here & my life is one...I'm doin things that I never done..."

2Pac featuring K-Ci & JoJo - HOW DO YOU WANT IT
"Love the way you activate your hips and push your ass out...got a brother wantin it so bad I'm bout to pass out..."

Ice Cube - IT WAS A GOOD DAY
"I gotta go cause I got me a drop top...and if I hit the switch, I can make the ass drop..."

Dido - THANK YOU (remix)
"I want to thank you...for giving me the best day of my life...oh just to be with you...is having the best day of my life..."

BREAKING NEWS on dat AZZ

2007-08-27T21:19:00.000-07:00

I know this is going to be hard to believe. I understand it might be a little hard to take. Some might find it hard to swallow. But the truth is this - I have been walking around with a giant cist/potentially fatal spider bite almost in the middle of my forehead for almost 5 days now. I am waiting for the venom to take effect...for the poison to slowly make its way into my brain. I can just imagine, laying in bed, happily zedding away when a giant spider lowers itself down from the ceiling. It lands directly on my forehead and because of the scent of my new Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue (I am not a label whore...I would prefer to be called a "dirrty label slut") proceeds to lay into me with its fangs and deadly poison. It's a pimple people and a ginormous one at that. Clean & Clear, Oxy, this and that...like this, that and this and uhhhhh...I wanna go to work but could you loan me a paper bag? It's the new look. Lemme call up Erykah Badu right quick...I just know she's got a head wrap for me. I would rock that mutha all day LONG, and bust out with some ill Justin Timberlake dance moves. YOU JUST DON'T KNOW. It's a talent. A gift. A curse. Going back to babble about Superbad for a minute - there was a preview for the new Batman (summer 08) and it was just the Batman symbol and dialogue. I became slightly aroused in the moment and the next 10 months waiting around for the next best movie ever will suck. In the meantime, Superbad The Sequel will be written and shot and released and make another 20 ba-zillion dollars off obscene amounts of cussing. I am all for cussing...I'm a Kevin Smith fan, remember? But when the cussing is just cussing for the sake of cussing - I ask why....and then I move on cause it really doesn't matter and this babble about Superbad (like they really NEED any more word of mouth) ends here. Common is releasing his next single and - doo doo doo doo - it's the track with LILY ALLEN. I'm in search of an astronaut suit right...NOW. Go to youtube and search for Common & Lauryn Hill. The track is Retrospect For Life - should have been HUUUUUUGE and wasn't - but Lauryn's vocals on that joint give me chills to this very day. Beautiful. I just want you to know. You're my favorite girl. Oh yea there's something about you. So this weekend, we're supposed to go see John Legend and Joss Stone in the afternoon and Lupe Fiasco and Wu Tang Clan in the evening at Bumbershoot. Rain rain go away, please don't fucking rain on Monday like it says in the stupid bastard forecast. Damn you rain...damn you!! No, you're not father...it's not true....I'll never join you!!!! I've been up since 5...please excuse me if I burst into random Snoop songs or Star Wars dialogue. Apparently this evening, it's just how I doo. And on that note, this dirrty little label slut will hit "PUBLISH POST" and get my chill on. But make no mistake, no matter what, no matter if the bank is open or not - so FLY - all day, every day......

GET. IN. the. CAR...!

2007-08-26T17:09:00.000-07:00

The love movement is in full swing, and I'm back up in this mutha. WHUT UP PARTY PEOPLE?! What a weekend...a whirlwind of good times. If you happen to be in Seattle and are planning on making reservations at The Pink Door, request a table inside. If you don't, it'll be like you're at a picnic sponsored by ZOOPA, complete with plastic table clothes and plastic CUPS! Really? Plastic cups?? Not havin' it and they should be ashamed of themselves. Get a table inside, somewhere off to the side, near the back. I'd recommend starting off with the gnocchi alla romano, some merlot and their insanely good lasanga with fresh spinach, layered with beciamella, pesto and topped with marinara sauce. Don't forget dessert...and it doesn't hurt, while at The Pink Door, to slip an engraved pink iPod Nano into the drink menu for someone special you're with. It should cause them to pause for a good five seconds - priceless. LOVE MOVEMENT!!! This is a plea to all six or seven of you reading this...visit the Red Fin. They were dead on Saturday night and looks like they need all the support they can get. While you're there, have the vegetable tempura, crispy tofu, green roll and the v6 vegetable roll. I also hear the caterpillar roll and the spicy tuna roll are very good. They don't valet anymore for the restaurant, so park across the street and stare up at the huge neon Hotel Max sign. To see my little man's name up in lights was a beautiful thing. Did I just eat all weekend long? That's an understatement. What can I tell ya? I love to eat. Go have breakfast at Peso's and wave to mommy. Hi mommy!! This really fly Puerto Rican from the Bronx got me some new Marc Ecko shirts - I think I'm in love. LOVE MOVEMENT!! Straight up and down. So I heard Superbad was super funny and it turns out, like any comedy blown out of proportion - it really wasn't all that. Lost steam about half way through and never recovered. I liked the first hour but the rest was average at best. Damn people from Tacoma are LOUD. QDOBA GRILL in the HIZ-ouse!!! Represent represent-sent. I snatched up that new Talib Kweli album today featuring a variety of guests, and by variety, I mean just that. Norah Jones, KRS ONE, Roy Ayers, UGK, Musiq Soulchild and some kid named Justin Timberlake. It's 20 tracks deep and once again I'm sure he's going to try and please everyone...hopefully this joint will play better than his last two albums that were all over the place. 3 1/2 stars for the new Public Enemy in the latest edition of Rolling Stone. Those reading this who like Lily Allen should check out Jem. Oh wow, Jem sounds like Lily Allen. Actually, Lily Allen sounds like Jem. The album is called "Finally Woken" and was released in March of 2004. Still like Lily better, but the girl needs to get her visa issues squared away. LOVE MOVEMENT!!! I'm just sayin'. Hanging up ish at 2am and finding that one extra pin that you need so badly - a beautiful thing. Gonna start some laundry now and find something to eat cause I haven't eaten nearly enough this past weekend. Can I have another mocha please, and make it a grande. I'm just sayin'. And to hell with eBay. BUY NOW. Doo it doo it doo it. GET. IN. THE. CAR! What a great weekend it was. Amazing. "SO fly. I love you endlessly".....

BOOGIE DOWN volume THREE

2007-08-21T19:42:00.000-07:00

Camp Lo - BLACK NOSTALJACK a.k.a. COME ON
"Always move like that one time for y'all (you get fly)...get fly...get fly..."

Kanye West, Rakim, Nas & KRS ONE - CLASSIC (DJ Premier remix)
"Can’t buy this, superflyness, like a shyness, your highness..."

N.E.R.D. - LAPDANCE
"I'm an outlaw (I'm an outlaw)...quick on the draw (quick on the draw)...somethin' you've never seen before (never seen)..."

The Notorious B.I.G. - ONE MORE CHANCE (remix)
"I'm clockin ya, Versace shades watchin ya...once ya grin, I'm in game, begin..."

Shock G - CHERRY FLAVA'D EMAIL
"Thank you for the cherry flava'd email...see how, seems the world is lovin' me now...meanwhile, the time is right...divine light shines and it's catchin' me now..."

Tony Touch featuring Total - I WONDER WHY (HE'S THE GREATEST DJ)
"Me and you one on one with the music...play the hot shit that makes ya just lose it..."

Masta Ace - BKLYN MASALA
"On out first date knocked on the door around 8...when she came down she smelled good and looked great...she had the tight Frankie D'z on, white on white ones...a pink bubble goose and pink bubblegum, I'm like: DAMN!!!..."

Lordz Of Brooklyn featuring Everlast - THE BROOKLYN WAY
"Step by step and day by day...spread love cause it's the Brooklyn way..."

Outkast featuring Sleepy Brown - THE WAY YOU MOVE
"I like the way you move...I like the way you move (Woooo)...I love the way you move...I love the way, I love the way..."

The Pussycat Dolls featuring Snoop Dogg - BUTTONS
"I show you how it go down, yeah, I wanna go down, me and you, one on one, treat you like a show down..."

A Tribe Called Quest - DA BOOTY
"MC from now til I get a frown...shake that ass girl because you world renowned..."

Twista - SLOW JAMZ (Collipark remix)
"Come with me and sip on some hella good champagne...you aint know Twista can work it like the Whispers...hit the stop light, get into some Isaac..."

J Dilla featuring Common & D'Angelo - SO FAR TO GO
"Let go, and let me live inside you...what your mouth don’t say, baby your thighs do..."

Blackstreet featuring Dr.Dre & Queen Pen - NO DIGGITY (remix)
"I can't get her out of my mind (wow)...I think about the girl all the time (wow wow)..."

Alicia Keys - IF I AIN'T GOT YOU (Black Eyed Peas remix)
"Some people want it all but I don't want nothing at all...if it ain't you baby...if I ain't got you baby..."

Brother Ali - FAHEEM
"I ain't never met a child quite like you...words don't suffice for me to describe you...you have a genuine goodness inside you...I watch you and wonder if I was ever like you...it's me and you brother for life...so when you put me in the ground look for me in the clouds...you make me the definition of proud...taught me what this life is really about..."

Montell Jordan featuring LL Cool J - GET IT ON TONITE (remix)
"My baby mad fly, honey hold me down..."

I'm MELLOW like JELL-O, cool like LEMONADE

2007-08-19T21:34:00.000-07:00

I know. Shut it. It's been a minute. The blogs are not as frequent as they once were. Is it because I have fallen into a deep depression because Lily Allen has cancelled her Seattle show next month? No. Is it because Amy Winehouse is almost destined to do the same thing? No. Is it because Jessica is sittin' on DUBS and I'm not? No. The fact of the matter is, there really is NO solid, concrete reason. It is what it is. But make no mistake about it - the kid is happy. Happier than he's ever been. Can you imagine Max living in Oregon and me being okay and happy about it? ME? HAPPY? About something like THAT? What kind of drugs are you on exactly? It's a potent mix of SOMETHING. Max is not going anywhere. He's still here, in full e-f-f-e-c-t....a smooth operator, operatin' correctly! So we're watching Teen Titans "Big Trouble In Tokyo" this afternoon and Beast Boy is getting hit on by all these Japanese girls (don't get me started on my dad...) and Max turns to me and says "daddy, Beast Boy likes girls...just like me!" Yes. I know. I'm got my hands full. Please don't make me have to have "the talk" with him at age 7. I'm just sayin'. The mannequins at Macy's are feeling awfully violated right about now. That's my boy...HOLLA!!!! I'd like to shout out the Vegas posse right now who will be returning to Seatown tomorrow, destined to become stars of The Hills next season. PEOPLE!! Slot, slot and don't stop. If your soul loves the sun, money slot on. 1-2 and ya don't stop. I was going through some of my containers full of stuff over the weekend and came across a gem which leads me to my next shout out. Flatline & The Funky Beats at the fair in Anchorage...I'm guessing 94 or 95...somewhere in there. T.C. on guitar, Pat on bass and The Warrior Of Chaos (whut up?!!?) on those damn BEATS...the man is an animal. We tore through 4 or 5 songs as I recall, none lasting more than 3 minutes cause that's how we did and how we doo. Anyways, through the beauty of the Passat having a cd and a tape player, I'll check it out tomorrow morning on the way to work and see how it holds up. Don't call it a comeback, I've been here for YEARS. The horse show was shut down for 2 weeks. I think it's re-opening on Wednesday. NEIGH! NEIGH!! Damn it feels good to be a gangsta. I shelled out the dough for a Lordz Of Brooklyn t-shirt last night - only 250 printed up - limited edition by Mr.Kaves. (want one? yeah ya do. go to www.lordzofbrooklyn.com) Still planning a trip to Brooklyn off in the future to have him hook me up with a Flatline tattoo, cause dammit, that's how I DOO. woo woo woo woo! Happy birthday T!! The wishes weren't late (hell, they were early) but reading this now it may appear like I'm slippin'. Nope. Never that. I'm tryin' not to lose my head. Max is talking in his sleep right now...either that, or it would translate into "muthafuckin' dad, stop ya noisy ass typing, I'm tryin' to catch my zed's...shit!!" I love my boy. To all the parents reading this - cheers. It is not an easy gig sometimes, always challenging, yet FOREVER rewarding. Ever miss someone sooo much that it hurts? I'm just sayin'. Resurrect the god through birth best believe. Still with me? Follow me-follow me-follow me-follow me but don't lose ya grip. I'm gonna end it off here and go in search of mad zed's...but if you need to call me at 3:30 in the morning I won't be mad at cha. On the real to real, stay fly....F to the L to the Y.........

BOOGIE DOWN - volume TWO

2007-08-13T21:02:00.000-07:00

Kool Moe Dee - HOW YA LIKE ME NOW
"How ya like me now..."

Ice Cube featuring Mack 10 & Ms.Toi - YOU CAN DO IT
"You can do it put your back into it...I can do it put your ass into it..."

Tweet - CALL ME
"Call me (call me)...Ooh when you need me (baby)...you don't have to worry (call me)...we can do (ooh) something..."

Everlast featuring Rahzel - CHILDREN'S STORY
"Once upon a time not long ago, when people wore pajamas and lived life slow..."

Lighter Shade Of Brown - HEY DJ
"Now I remember around the way back-back in the day...I used to know a DJ who could mix it wicked...pick it up
pick it up mic check one two..."

Eve featuring Gwen Stefani - LET ME BLOW YA MIND
"Drop your glasses, shake your asses...face screwed up like you having hot flashes..."

Sean Paul - TEMPERATURE
"Well woman the way they time cool I wanna be keepin' you warm...I got the right temperature for shelter you from the storm..."

Kanye West - THE NEW WORKOUT PLAN (live @ Abbey Road Studios)
"Oh girl your silhouette...make me wanna light a cigarette..."

Pete Rock & CL Smooth - CARMEL CITY
"Take a hot shower...slip on some linen...now its a new time, a new day, a new beginnin'..."

Ginuwine - IN THOSE JEANS
"You are the bomb...girl you tight to death...baby, I don't know the words to say to you...all that I know, baby all I know is
that I'm lovin' what I see and I'm feeling you...."

Da Brat featuring The Notorious B.I.G. - DA B SIDE
"Oh shit, on top of all that, I'm so-so remarkable, flow, making competition know..."

Lady Sovereign featuring Missy Elliott - LOVE ME OR HATE ME (remix)
"I'm a lover, I don't need to fight...give me time and I'll blow your mind..."

Trick Daddy featuring Cee-Lo & Ludacris - SUGAR
"She put that sugar on my tongue, tongue...yippie yippie, yum yum...goodie goodie gum drop...put me in a tongue lock..."

Q-Tip - VIVRANT THING
"Special girl, real good girl...biggest thing in my itty bitty world..."

DJ Honda featuring Sadat X & Grand Puba - STRAIGHT TALK FROM NY
"I'm still politicin', scrappin' all the paper in...bringin' the socki in the Bronx got a brother thinkin'..."

Aaliyah - ROCK THE BOAT
"...work the middle...work the middle...work the middle..."

LL Cool J featuring Total - LOUNGIN' (remix)
"Who do you love (I wanna lounge wit you)...are you for sure (I do what I gotta do)..."

Snoop Dogg featuring Pharrell - BEAUTIFUL
"Beautiful, I just want you to know (oh-hooo!)...you're my favorite girl...(ehh...oh yeah, theres something about you)..."

Deee-Lite - CALL ME
"You can call me any time on my hello happy line...you can call me any time on my hello happy line..."

ON TOP...there's NO doubt...WE BUGGIN' OUT

2007-08-12T13:55:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm not going to talk about how the new PUBLIC ENEMY album is in stores NOW. I will not mention just HOW GOOD my dinner was at KING FISH CAFE on Friday night. Oh mommy, I hope the BANK will close up for business soon. BEEF DIPS smell SO GOOD. (kinda noisy out here, isn't it?) I will not mention anything about making KEYS or how long the line up was at STARBUCKS on Saturday morning to get a grande non-fat white chocolate mocha with no whip and two pumps. Snoqualmie Falls? WHERE'S THAT? Never been. You haven't WALKED A MILE in my shoes and chances are VERY GOOD that the peeps around me are on some sort of BUS TOUR. (IIIIIII love a PARADE~!!!) Sometimes you have to drive around IN A CIRCLE just to get to a Mexican place for lunch. It happens to the best of us. That's okay though when you're driving around in the PASSAT and your soundtrack for zipping around is LILY ALLEN (please get your VISA sorted) and AMY WINEHOUSE (please don't die within the year). I wouldn't know if NORDSTROM or MACY'S is having a sale...I didn't go there this weekend. I do know one thing. While TARGET may sell a certain model of vacuum for FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS, it does not mean you have to buy one. Go get a MASSAGE and a FACIAL. I didn't get one, but I know someone who DID. Have a mentioned how GOOD that new ILL BILL record is? Or how dope that MASTA ACE remix & rarity collection is? I JUST DID. If you have a huge Mexican lunch, find a mall and walk around in it until you can walk no more. Then, later that evening, have a nice SALAD, by candlelight, with REMY SHAND playing and a glass or two of CHAMPAGNE. I would also recommend mixing up a SMIRNOFF BLUEBERRY MARTINI...side effects may be MAYJAH, OUT OF THE BLUE and WITHOUT WARNING. May also cause cravings for LAY'S BBQ CHIPS and random viewings of PULP FICTION. Some people have a lot to say at 5:30 in the morning. Some people should really go to JAVA LOVE when they wake up, get a delicious MOCHA and BREAKFAST. (ohhh! good MORNING!) These things just have to be DONE sometimes...but I don't wanna talk about it. A picture paints a thousand words, doesn't it? I could say a thousand words but I'll sum it up with two - SO FLY..............

BEN SHERMAN must DIE

2007-08-05T16:51:00.000-07:00

I don't condone the death of Ben Sherman. Truth is, I don't even want him dead. I want him away from the Marc Ecko Collection. He's all up in Marc's grill and it's not cool. Here's two things for those not knowing...#1 - I am a clothing WHORE. Dirrty (with 2 r's like Christina), rotten clothing whore. #2 - Ben Sherman is a clothing designer (I guess, but who is he REALLY?) and his clothes are located directly next to Marc Ecko's ish which is 10 times flyer than Ben's. I've had it up to here. Sometimes, Ben's stuff ends up on Marc Ecko's racks. Those are Marc's racks, not yours Ben - ya muthafucka. Ease back with a quickness son! If anyone has any information about the location of Ben Sherman, please get at me. I thank you kindly in advance. www.marceckocollection.com (Fall 07 collection is up and it's CRAZY!!...check it) I've been up since around 5 this morning. Couldn't sleep? Yeah, something like that. When you're on a boat and two trains roll by blowing their freakin' whistle and then seagulls are yap-yap-yapping, sleeping is completely out of the question. Plus it was bright as hell this morning at 5:30. Whine whine whine...you got to go on a boat. Yes, I did...with a five year old. YOU go on a boat with a five year old and see how much fun YOU have. Max DID have a great time, fishing for sharks with his Spider-man fishing pole and driving the boat in circles. If he's happy, I'm happy - but ya boy is exhausted. Shall we continue with the ranting? Yes, let us bow our heads and rant. People who drive pick up trucks with camper trailers attached might wanna slow down on those turns, otherwise your shit will flip over and delay ME for a half hour. And to the 80 year old man in the Kia (I'm not joking, I bet he was 83) who decided to use the spot on I-5 where it clearly says no u-turns and the cops usually sit there - FUCK YOU. Damn, that's cold, telling an 83 year old man that. Yeah? Well, he didn't use that lane and pull out WITHOUT STOPPING in front of you, causing me to break and swerve to avoid hitting the motherfucker going 70mph. I'm so glad Max was taking a nap for that one. He woke up wondering how his dvd player ended up on the floor of the car. It's not just a car - it's a Passat and oh how I love it so. Random things to fill up space...Coke Zero (and Sprite Zero) are delicious...those double flavor Doritos are a tasty idea (thanks Stacie)...music to guide the way included lots of Lily Allen, the new Public Enemy and the new Common...people from California drive fucking NUTS...shout out to my man Champagne - keep ya head up...changing lives since April 16th NO diggety NO doubt...the flyest of the fly, why ask why?...if I had some Smirnoff Blueberry vodka, I'd drink it...did Starbucks feel pressure from Smirnoff and create the newly released blueberry frappacino...did I spell frappacino right?...does it even matter? I have to gotz ta GO. As the sun shines down on the lord's day, wave ya hands in the air like you just don't care. Muthafucka say WHAT? It's been a pleasure as always and I thank you for taking the time to read this rambling. Look out...scatter...get out the way...MOVE!! This is only the beginning. STAY FLY...

BOOGIE DOWN volume one

2007-08-03T21:34:00.000-07:00

Joss Stone featuring Lauryn Hill - MUSIC
"Music...I'm so in love with my music...The way you keep me...Movin...Ain't nobody doing what you're doing..."

LL Cool J featuring Jennifer Lopez - CONTROL MYSELF
"She licked, off, her lip, gloss...Her hips, tossed, back, and forth...Side, to side, and up, and down...She touched, the ground, it turned, me out..."

The Beatnuts - WATCH OUT NOW
"Aiyyo my song's on, I gotta get my grub on some to-to...(I love dough-oh) Order three buckets of Mo'-Mo'..."

Amerie featuring Eve - 1 THING (remix)
"It’s this 1 thing that’s got me trippin...It’s this 1 thing that’s got me trippin (you did)...This 1 thing my soul may be feeling...It’s this 1 thing you did oh oh..."

Redman - PUT IT DOWN
"put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down put it down"

Christina Aguilera - STILL DIRRTY
"Why is a woman's sexuality...Always under so much scrutiny...Why can't she do exactly as she please...Without being called a million things..."

Ludacris featuring Pharrell - MONEY MAKER
"Switch, switch, switch it from right to left...And switch it till you running right out of breath...And take a break until you ready again..."

Masta Ace - BEAUTIFUL
"You know the sound is pretty...Even when you got to get down and gritty...This is money in the bank like you down wit' Diddy...This a helicopter ride around the city...And we love it cuz it brought us here...It's like a young mother braidin' her daughter's hair...It's beautiful..."

Rihanna - S.O.S.
"I'm out with you, you got me head over heels...you keep me hanging on the way you make me feel..."

Craig Mack featuring The Notorious B.I.G., Rampage, LL Cool J & Busta Rhymes - FLAVA IN YA EAR (remix)
"Heesheeee, Uhhhhh...blowticious...Skeevee [mmmmmm] delicious..."

Brother Ali - TAKE ME HOME
"I ain't waiting, I'm patiently persevering...I see greatness in the person in the mirror very clearly...and that's why I take this seriously...baby come near to me and truly truly hear me..."

Angie Martinez featuring Lil'Mo - IF I COULD GO
"Have you ever been close to feelin like leavin the coast too...Feelin like leavin with somebody who...Hold you the right way...while watchin the night fade...Make you feel like you right back in the ninth grade..."

A Tribe Called Quest - ELECTRIC RELAXATION
"Honey, check it out, you got me mesmerized...With your black hair and fat-ass thighs...Street poetry is my everyday...But yo, I gotta stop when you trot my way..."

Naughty By Nature - FEEL ME FLOW
"Play and Kay'll break the body of a beat...The beat the break into boogie...Firm and fully chase bass lines like bullies...All we wanna know is if your body wanna party..."

Alicia Keys - HOW COME U DON'T CALL ME (Neptunes remix)
"I keep your picture beside my bed mmm..and I still remember everything you said mmm oh yeah..."

DJ Jazzy Jeff featuring CL Smooth - ALL I KNOW
"We marvel at the up close and personal...meeting of the minds...you should read the signs...this is what reclines...the thoughts in my la-z-boy...fit like a hand in glove from the city of brotherly love..."

Boogie Down Productions - SOUTH BRONX
"South Bronx! The South-South Bronx! South Bronx! The South-South Bronx!..."

THROW your HANDS in the AIR

2007-08-03T09:33:00.000-07:00

Wave'em like you just don't care....and iff you've got a mad craving for SAUSAGES, somebody say "OH YEA!!" Man, sometimes, sausages just be overflowing and tearing the casing and everything be falling out and it's just...COMEDY. People!! Today we've having SAUSAGES! S.O.S. please someone help her, it's not healthy, for her to dress this WAY!!!! Damn I'm milking this...but can you blame me? PEOPLE!!!! So there's no sun in the sky although I see some blue peaking out from behind the clouds. I wanted to get on here cause I will be internet-less for the next 3 days. Max and I will be going up to Blaine to hang out with my dad on his boat. I got Max a Spider-man fishing pole..."so I can catch sharks daddy". It'll be nice to get out of town for a bit, just hope Max is extra good. If you haven't got it yet, what are you waiting for? Common's new album is sure to be at the top of my best of 2007 list. It's a nice mix of that BOOM BAP and soul that only Common can bring. Kanye's production is all over this one again, but he stepped it up from what he did on "Be" which sounded like beats on autopilot. My interview questions for Gary G-Wiz have been sent in. Should get a response over the weekend and then get the interview posted up at Rapstation next week, just in time for the new Public Enemy album which is in stores Tuesday. BUY IT. Oh, and back to Common again for a minute - there's been another Lily Allen sighting. She's on his album too. Can't wait to see her live. Very excited about that. WORD UP. To all those who are happy for my happiness, to all those who are excited for where my life is heading - I thank you so very much. Meetings in Victoria's Secret though?....AWWWK-WARD!! I am truly the happiest man on the planet. It's written all over my face and has been for months now. If you were in my shoes, you'd feel the exact same way. Speaking of which, can I get some new shell toes? I'm just sayin'. SAUSAGES. What a way to start the morning. Wooooooooooo!! I want my sausages sausages sausages sausages SAUSAGES. Yiiiii. WILLLLLBUR!! Neigh! Neigh! The kid is ON some ISH this morning. And you thought the blogs at night were bad?! GOOD MORNING PEOPLE! Straight, straight, straight JACKED. I better get off of here now and start getting everything ready to roll out. ROLL OUT...ROLL OUT. To each and every one of the seven people reading this - hope you have a great weekend. I hope you live a sauasage-free life. Life is too short for sausages. Sausage kills. Damn this really makes up for that last little itty-bitty blog doesn't it? I dooo what I can. The kids mind is blown. On the real to real - STAY FLY. It's a WRAP......

MORE than MEETS the EYE!

2007-07-30T21:35:00.000-07:00

I'm going for three blogs in a row with not a drop of alcohol in my system. Drip...drop...drip...DROP. So Tom Snyder is dead. I can clearly remember when I lived in Alaska, staying up late making mixtapes...yes, tapes, as in, CASSETTE TAPES...and his show would come on after Letterman I think and sometimes he'd have some really great people on there. I always appreciated his interview style, very conversation-like, as if he had a genuine interest in what the person had to say. I don't recall his questions being scripted like, say...oh, I don't know...OPRAH? A statement like that out in public might get me JUMPED but we're here in the land of cyberspace and I can say whatever I'd like. I think Oprah is wack, but back to Tom Snyder. He did really great interviews. Period. Remember this? "Fire up a colortini, sit back, relax, and watch the pictures, now, as they fly through the air." He said it every night. Peace to Tom Snyder. Go here if you wanna take it BACK to another dude who I used to watch ALL the TIME - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BH6D4LvYZwA - featuring the likes of YoYo, MC Lyte, Naughty By Nature, CL Smooth, A Tribe Called Quest, Guru, DAS EFX, Wu-Tang Clan, KRS ONE, Mad Lion, Fu-Schnickens...amazing. Tomorrow - 300 on dvd and the new Common album. What more could you ask for? The new Public Enemy? That's out NEXT Tuesday. GET THAT. BUY THAT. SUPPORT THAT. Let's call this a blog and call it GOOD cause I don't think I have much more to babble about. Word to the seven people reading this. Word to vodka pasta sauce. Word to gardenburger. Word to being so fly.....SO FLY. I'm out.....ZED.

GETTIN' ya DOWN like GRAVITY

2007-07-29T22:04:00.000-07:00

This hip hop's in me...so they can't stop me...the rhyme animal has resurfaced...wreckin' all elements...destroyin' all irrelevance!! How is one supposed to go to work tomorrow? Really? REALLY? I've got a copy of the new Public Enemy which I can't stop listening to, and I get to interview Gary G-Wiz who has single handedly created some of my favorite PE tracks. No joke, the kid is AMPED. So what else is happening? Common's new album is out on Tuesday ($10 at Circuit City...snatch dat UP!) and so is "300" which is one hell of a movie. Frank Miller is genius and, really, that's all that needs to be said. See it. Watch it. Rent it. Buy it. Do what you gotta do. Just make sure you check that cause it'll make your jaw drop. That's a good thing. Know what else is good? LIFE. I'm just sayin'. It's funny how so much GOOD GOOD GOOD comes out of so much BAD. Weeks and months go by, just taking things day to day, just barely getting by, operating on autopilot and then suddenly...a 180 of GINORMOUS proportions. It's a real deal official word. Check the new Webster's if you don't believe this babbling blogging idiot. The secret is THREE shots of that Absolut Raspberry...not two. Trial and error, error and trial. I'm more than okay with that. That's life. Stacie and Kevin has been sharing LIFE for 10 years now and they've been celebrating all weekend long with peeps from all over and I really wish them nothing but the absolute BEST. Cheers you two. Hope you had a fabulous weekend. I went download crazy at the iTunes store last night, staying up well past my bedtime downloading the likes of Lily Allen (3 b-sides and a remix), Camp Lo, a track with Eminem & Masta Ace, DJ Jazzy Jeff featuring Method Man, Marco Polo featuring Masta Ace, O.C. & Copywrite, two tracks featuring R.A. The Rugged Man (illest emcee on the planet, PERIOD), Garbage remixed by Massive Attack...even downloaded Push It by Salt N Pepa, cause dammit, why the hell not? But because of staying up late to download all that, this blog may be a tad short. You really can't complain though - it's two blogs within 24 hours. Will it ever happen again? Will Baird's silly ass be able to do a third tomorrow? Will the ground shake and mountains crumble at the very thought of it all? Is this the most dramatic ish you've ever read in your life? My eyelids are getting heavy, forgive me. I must now retire...for this evening. If I'm back tomorrow it will be some kind of miracle. Must have something to do with god's day or some ish like DAT. Like this, that, and this and uhhhhh.....oh! Erykah Badu's debut and Warren G's debut have been re-issued, both with a bonus cd of remixes and ISH like that. Madness. Madness in the hood I tell you!!! Why can't I stop typing?! Pull me away from the damn computer..."PUBLISH POST" and let's be OUT this muthafucka. Off to catch mad ZED's for REAL. In closing, I'd like to remind you - stay fly....off the damn scales, even surrounded by the blinking lights and sounds of video games at 11 o'clock in the morning. F to the L to the Y....all day, every day.............

SATURDAY NITE FEVER...WORD to MAMA MIA!

2007-07-28T21:35:00.000-07:00

Connected like Sinatra...the phantom of the opera. G'DAMN. Not a blog in sight. No blog to be had. No blog action. Nothing. Zero. ZILCH. Zilch is a great fucking word. Please incorporate it into your everyday conversations. Please be like me. Mix up 2 shots of Absolut Raspberry, some white apple juice, shake it up, pour it into a chilled martini glass and call it GOOD. My mom and sister came down from Vancouver today to kick it with Max. Hadn't seen them in a minute...as in minute = 4-5 months now I think. Like I said, it's been a minute. So we go out, have lunch, go to Toys R Us, check out Borders, get a coffee, and then we head back to my place. When we get home, I run down to the mailbox with Max in the hopes of something MAYJAH being in there for me. And there is. And it's fooking MAYJAH with a capital "M". It's the new Public Enemy album, an advanced copy, sent to me since I'll be doing an interview with one of their producers, Gary G-Wiz. For those familar with PE, G-Wiz has been around since Apocalypse 91...The Enemy Strikes Black. That means I've been going bananas for his beats since I was 15 or 16 years old. Lemme grab that album real quick. Dude is responsible for such cuts as Lost At Birth (greatest album intro EVER), Nighttrain, Can't Truss It, By The Time I Get To Arizona, Shut'em Down....like I said - MAYJAH. And after loading up the new Public Enemy onto my iPod and giving it a solid listen, I'm just THAT much more excited to be speaking with him. It's easily their best work in years. Solid from start to finish. Elements of soul, funk and rock brought into the mix. Hard ass beats. BLOCK ROCKIN' BEATS. This ish is gonna sound soooo fucking good in the Passat. Windows down - Public Enemy #1. Speaking of soul, Samuel L Jackson put in his best performance in a llllllong ass time in Black Snake Moan. The movie was not what I expected and he was amazing in it. Check it out. Also watched another movie starring Justin Timberlake called Alpha Dog. Decent flick but nothing spectacular. It got going pretty well and then nothing happened for the longest time. Worth checking out for Sharon Stone acting again. You know, she was soooo good in Casino...what in the HELL happened?? Doesn't really matter to me. Will not loose sleep over it. So anyways, just wanted to check in, say what's up, tell you that life is so good at age 32, I'm already looking forward to 33. So fly. So damn fly. Do a double take. Still fly and always will be....FLY..............

TOP TWENTY FIVE

2007-07-23T13:19:00.001-07:00

I came across this while eating lunch and loved it. Chris Rock's Top 25 Hip Hop Albums. I may come up with my own list down the line, but until then, read this...

25.) DIZZIE RASCAL - Boy in Da Corner (2004)
This shit is so ahead of its time, I don't know why they told him to do it slower and make it sound American or whatever they did on his next album. It's hard, man. I'm surprised no American rappers were smart enough to have him produce them. When you hear those beats, you think "OK, if blankety-blank was on this, it would be a hit."
That Dizzee Rascal is just fucking ridiculous. Make this one my last one.

24.) DJ QUIK - WAY 2 FONKY (1992)
This is such a mindless gangsta-rap record, but some of it is actually very smart. There's a song on there about how different cities are "just like Compton." It's about how this gang shit is spreading all over the country.

23.) LAURYN HILL - THE MISEDUCATION OF LAURYN HILL (1998)
Lauryn Hill was groundbreaking because for the first time since Salt-N-Pepa the world was hearing a heterosexual woman rap an couldn't believe it. This is a masterpeice of a record.
I know there's a lot of singing on there, but there's a lot of rapping, too.
People don't have a problem with conscious rap; they have a problem with conscious beats.
If you make some ignorant beats, you can say all the smart shit you want.

22.) PUBLIC ENEMY - IT TAKES A NATION OF MILLION TO HOLD US BACK (1988)
It still holds up. The beats and production are just incredible. Chuck, Flavor, political conscious-ness--we all know why this album's great. I can't say anything that hasn't been said about it.

21.) OUTKAST - AQUEMINI (1998)
All their records are good, but this one went to the next level. "Liberation" is my favorite. You can hear the Erykah Badu influence on this record. OutKast did a great record while Andre was with Erykah. Common made a great record when he was with Erykah. Before I write any more jokes, I think I'm gonna call Erykah Badu.

20.) NAS - STILLMATIC (2001)
Do you know what I like about Stillmatic? Jay-Z (who is famously dissed on the song "Ether") should have gotten a co-producer's credit on it, because Nas was definitely floundering just before it. It's like Mama Said Knock You Out eleven years earlier, where a guy just reclaimed his spot with some great records. There's a record on there called "2nd Childhood" about people who won't grow up, that's just so fucking smart.

19.) JAY-Z - REASONABLE DOUBT (1996)
I love this CD and I hate it. I love it 'cause it's Jay's best record -- best beats, best flow -- and I hate it 'cause since it came out every rap record is trying to copy it. What Jay-Z did with Rea-
sonable Doubt is take the Scarface formula and pretty it up for New York. Reasonable Doubt is his real Blueprint. I still listen to it.

18.) SCARFACE - MR. SCARFACE IS BACK (1991)
Everything Biggie did, everything 'Pac did, everything Jay-Zdoes was originally done on the first Scarface album. Biggie kills himself at the end of his first record; well, Scarface did it three years earlier. He was the first guy to do his rhymes in the first person about robbing people and drug dealing; he was the first guy to really talk about being depressed and being institutionalized, and how his mama is scared of him. He is the most underrated rapper of all time and absolutely in the top three. You cannot get to four without mentioning Scarface. Any rapper knows that.

17.) ICE CUBE - AMERIKKKA'S MOST WANTED (1990)
This is the original Best of Both Worlds. You've got the East Coast and the West Coast together.
And you've got Ice Cube at his maddest. He was the mack. I remember when Ice Cube played at the Apollo on this tour. Every rapper in town was there. It was like seeing Hendrix or some shit.
From 1990 to 1994, Ice Cube was unquestionably the best rapper in the world -- without peer.

16.) WYCLEF JEAN - THE CARVINAL (1997)
Forget all that you know. Much like Liquid Swords, The Carvinal is the best Fugees record. It's better than The Score. They're all on there -- it's Wyclef Jean, it's Lauryn Hil, it's Pras, it's that John Forte cat who's in jail. And it's all of them at their best. Even the Neville Brothers are on the album. They rap in French; "Gone Till November" is on there; it's insane. Go back and listen to this album, and try to block out all his other records. It's like watching Rocky. If you forget about most of the other Stallone films, you have a masterpiece.

15.) GETO BOYS - THE RESURRECTION (1996)
The last line of the whole album is "I'm the type of nigga that throws a party when the flag burns/I'm at the point of no return." When I heard that lyric, I was like, "OK, you got me, man." The whole Resurrection album is Scarface, Willie D, and Bushwick Bill getting politically conscious, but in a Geto Boys way. It's gangsta, and it's an incredible record. It's also (Audioslave/Rage Against The Machine guitarist) Tom Morello's favorite album.

14.) GHOSTFACE KILLAH - SUPREME CLIENTELE (2000)
This will go down as the last great Wu-Tang album. "Stroke Of Death" is so gangster it makes you wanna stab your baby sitter. There's a record on there that's just a scratch; Ghostface lets the beat play for four seconds, then keeps bringing it back. My other favorite Wu-Tang albumis Ol' Dirty Bastard's Nigga Please.
It's so much fun. It's kind of like There's A Riot Goin' On, because he was that high.

13.) GENIUS/GZA - LIQUID SWORDS
For my money, Liquid Swords is the best Wu-Tang Clan album. It's like the Songs in the Key of Life of rap.
It's so fucking smart and so hard. Everybody's on there, too. You don't really need a Wu-Tang album; Liquid Swords is all you really need to know. As you grow older, you look for records that hold up. And Liquid Swords holds up.

12.) ERIC B. AND RAKIM - FOLLOW THE LEADER (1988)
If I ever have a son, his middle name will be Rakim. "Lyrics Of Fury" is probablly, lyrically, the best rapping anyone's ever done. The line I love most is on "Follow The Leader": "I can take a phrase that's rarely heard/Flip it/Now it's a daily word." That's what every writer aspires to. It's the flyest shit I've ever heard. I have that on a wall in my office. The coolest thing about Rakim is that he's the only rapper who really has a mystique.
He's still to this day the most mysterious guy in rap. He's not quite Sly Stone, but people wonder.

11.) THE D.O.C. - NO ONE CAN DO IT BETTER (1989)
Before Dre found Snoop, he had the D.O.C. I was going to school in Brooklyn, and the only time you could see rap videos was on a weekend show with Ralph McDaniels called Video Music Box. D.O.C.'s video for "It's Funky Enough" premiered, and D.O.C. had an L.A. Kings hat on. When I came to school on Monday, half the kids in Brooklyn had L.A. Kings hats on. It was official. The whole album was great, especially the last cut, "The Grand Finale," with the D.O.C. and NWA.

10.) DE LA SOUL - BUHLOONE MINDSTATE (1993)
The first two De La Soul albums are two of the greatest albums ever, but Buhloone Mindstate is so grown up.
It helped shape me as a comedian. It's the last album Prince Paul produced for them and, as far as I'm concerned, he's a member of De La Soul. If you take Prince Paul out, none of the albums hold up. It's also got that great line "Fuck being heard, Posdnuos is complicated." That's some gangsta shit, because he don't give a fuck.

9.) A TRIBE CALLED QUEST - THE LOW-END THEORY (1991)
It's really hard to top this album. They made other good records, but they never got to this level again. It is from beginning to end a masterpiece. Phife has got a weird midget-DMC energy. And as much as I love Q-Tip, nobody's bigger than the group. He and Phife together are just incredible.

8.) BEASTIE BOYS - PAUL'S BOUTIQUE (1989)
Don't go anywhere without it. It's one of those records that you buy every time you're in a rental car. It's also one of those records that you thought sucked the day you bought it. You were mad because it sounded nothing like Licensed To Ill. Then a month later, you're like, "This is the best shit ever. High Plains Drifter is the best song ever made."

7.) EPMD - UNFINISHED BUSINESS (1989)
The second EPMD album is as good as two guys can get whose names aren't Run and DMC. The production is insanity. Before Eminem made "Lose Yourself", "Please Listen To My Demo" was the best record about wanting to become a rapper ever made.

6 LL COOL J.) - MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT (1990)
The beauty of LL's Mama Said Knock You Out is that it's like the Secret deodorant: strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. It's hard gangsta shit. But at the same time, I could put the CD on with my mother in the car and drive from New York to Philly. It's also the first comeback in rap. It's the real blueprint: if people think you're done, this is how you come back. It's one of my favorite albums ever. It's LL at his best and Marley Marl at his best. It's LL as Madonna, in the sense of Madonna saying, "Who's the hot producer? Let me get that person." LL was the first rapper smart enough to do that. Now it's what everyone does.

5.) PHARCYDE - BIZARRE RIDE II: THE PHARCYDE (1992)
Only in rap do you get one-album-wonders. The Pharcyde are like the Boston of rap. I don't know what happened afterward, but the first Pharcyde album is incredible. The rhyming is great, the vocals are great, the production is ridiculous. Everything is just way ahead of its time. It's a shame everybody got overtaken by gangsterism. Everyone wants to be hard, so they don't make records like this anymore. It happens to comedians, too. They want to be cool, but just being funny is cool.

4.) RUN-DMC - RAISING HELL (1986)
Raising Hell is the first great rap album ever. I like Run, but I love DMC. No one ever sounded like DMC; no one ever looks like DMC. He's like a superhero. Raising Hell is probably Rick Rubin's best record. "It's Tricky" is a weird song because it's so gangsta and pop at the same time. There's a track on there, "Hit It Run", which is just DMC with Run doing the human beatbox: "I leave allsuckers in the dust/Those dumb motherfuckers can't mess with us." It was actually the first time I heard a guy curse on a record.

3.) 2PAC - RAP PHENOMENON II (MIX TAPE, 2003)
You'd have to go to Harlem or a swap meet to get this one. It's done by DJ Green Lantern, DJ Vlad and Dirty Harry. They got tapes of Tupac's vocals and put them over all the newest, baddest beats of the last four years. So you hear Tupac rapping over the "Hate Me Now" beat. It's the best shit in the world. It's ultimate fighting music. You will kill somebody listening to this shit.

2.) SNOOP DOGGY DOGG - DOGGYSTYLE (1993)
Doggystyle, to me, is better than Dr. Dre's Chronic. It has held up way better because it's a party album, and its lyrics are better. The Chronic is sonically incredible, but it's hard to drive around singing songs about "Eazy-E can eat a big fat dick." But I got a feeling I'll be singing "Gin and Juice" when I'm ninety.

1.) N.W.A. - STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON (1988)
N.W.A. is the most influential act of the last thirty years -- bigger than Nirvana, Madonna or the Sex Pistols. Nothing has ever been the same since they came. I remember I was in L.A. when I was a kid, and I brought Straight Outta Compton back to New York. More people were coming over to my house to listen to N.W.A. than were going across the street to the crack house. I had the real shit. It was kind of like the British Invasion for black people.

IF I ruled the WORLD (IMAGINE THAT)

2007-07-20T22:48:00.000-07:00

Imagine if you met someone that was a dream come true. Imagine out of the badness, goodness would come through. Imagine every day that's better than the last. Imagine the future being brighter than the past. Imagine losing your breath and your heart skipping a beat. Imagine hanging out on the corner of a Bronx street. Imagine if your favorite number happened to be eight. Imagine that you met someone and it just had to be fate. Imagine if you got a record shaped birthday cake. Imagine out of nowhere that you meet your soulmate. Imagine every thought and word simply ringing true. Imagine life for me at the age of thirty two. Just imagine. Forever. Simply put - best birthday ever. I got 32 reasons why it was the best ever but I'll keep'em to myself. I got my boy Maxwell here...he's asleep, as I will be soon, but tomorrow it's all about going to see Thomas The Tank Engine. It better not rain. I'm thinking a sunny break, right when we get there, would work best for me. I think I'm operating off 4 hours of sleep and a martini at the moment. Excuse me while I kiss the sky. Along with Thomas this weekend, my mom and sister may come into town and Sunday night I may get together with the one known as T-Diggy...we need to get our birthday drink on. I can't stop looking at this picture on my desk. Type. Pause. Type. Pause. I started to watch Black Snake Moan tonight with Samuel L Jackson and Christina Ricci...oh, and the little homie Justin Timberlake who says all his lines in this high pitched squeal. It's not that bad, he does alright, but I just keep on waiting for him to break into MY LOVE...MY LOVE...MY LOVE...MY LOVE. I think I could probably write a symphony. Right. Now. Eyelids getting heavy...typing in slowwww mmmmmotion. I thought about writing these damn blogs in paragraphs...but that would just make it easier to read and there's no fun in that. Struggle to read this random babbling that FEELS so GOOD. I accept presents at all hours...24/7/365. Lily Allen is coming to Seattle. I'm going. She's so damn WITTY. If you haven't checked out her album, I'd suggest you do so. Her, Amy Winehouse and Mark Ronson - major talent. MAYJAH. What did I do with my camo shorts and white t-shirt? For the next 30 seconds I will type in a British accent. Allo everyone. My name is Baird and I'm from Vancouver fooking Canada. It's such a beautiful city. Mayjah. And cut. I really should end things off here. It's a bad sign when one starts typing with an accent. Totally and completely out of control. Get this man away from the computer. With a quickness. Now. Must catch those zed's. I'm playing zed catch up after b-day festivities. So MAYJAH and SO DAMN FLY. You know the drill........

SOMETIMES CLEVER TITLES ESCAPE me

2007-07-18T21:46:00.000-07:00

On the eve of 31 becoming 32, one might pause and reflect and look over the last 365 days or so. But not me. I'm on this forward moving, don't look back, look at me muthafuckaz train. I've seen the future and it will be. I've climbed out of the past 6 months a better person, a stronger person and ultimately, as I type this to no one in particular except for a select few, I am the happiest I've ever been. By that, I mean, I am the happiest I have EVER been. I did not stutter. The feeling of true happiness, one that is so true and so pure is hard to come by, but when it hits you - you know it. There's no denying it. Why would you? Fact of the matter is, many of us just go day in and day out, going through the motions, thinking we're happy when we're not...when we're not pushing ourselves, not truly satisfied on multiple levels. Eventually it'll make you feel dead, like you serve absolutely no purpose. You gotta have purpose, gotta be able to get out there and try new things, take risks, see failure, feel success and know that you fucking deserve it. The drinking has taken a backseat for the moment. I went through some mad weeks of mad drinking...not excessively by any means, but if the mind is not clear, the actions and reactions to situations thrown your way will not be either. So you gotta get some goals for yourself, some ideas, some dreams and see what you're able to obtain. Fuck anyone who tries to crush that. Shine. The beginning of 2007 was a difficult one for me - beyond difficult. Hard to really comprehend how I made it through everything but here I am, and guess what? The final months of 2007 will be amazing. Your boy is happy. Holla!! And it's not because of one shot of Absolut Raspberry either. Delicious. So what's up and what's been going on? I'll be interviewing Gary G-Wiz from The Bomb Squad (one of Public Enemy's producers) next week for Rapstation - couldn't be more thrilled. I guess he's checked out some of my past stuff I've done interview-wise and he's excited to talk me. ME. Imagine that. There's been music I've downloaded recently in the last 2 days that makes me feel like not all is lost. For one, that new Public Enemy single with those G-Wiz horns. Also, new Chaka Khan featuring Mary J Blige, 4 new CLASSIC tracks from the upcoming Common album, new Jill Scott and Angie Stone - two ladies that'll sing tha ish out a track...even the 3 new Kanye tracks I've heard are all real good. There's some much needed SOUL coming back into music or being added into the dying art form known as hip hop. It's a beautiful thing. Sometimes you just gotta get on here and type whatever comes to you...don't look back. You think I'm going back and editing out ISH? Hardly. I breeze through at the end and check for spelling but whatever hits the page, stays on the page. Inner-most thoughts...it's kinda how I do...rapid fire lines. So happy birthday to me. I need to end things here and head for the land of zed's....it's also how I doo. On the real to real, do what you feel, and above all - STAY FLY.........

BITTERSWEET SYMPHONY...that's LIFE

2007-07-14T22:15:00.000-07:00

Try to make ends meet, you're a slave to the money, then you die. There is a GOD and GOD made one of my favorite bands of ALL TIME get back together. THE VERVE. Together again. Recording a new album together. Proceed to scream like a little girl. Go here: http://www.theverve.tv/ Never thought they'd ever record more music together but love love LOVE that they are. "Urban Hymns" is one of my favorite albums EVER. By favorite, I mean up there with the greats - The Beatles "Revolver", Public Enemy "It Takes A Nation Of Millions To Hold Us Back", DJ Shadow "Endtroducing"...it's UP there. So you'll have to pardon me if I'm alcohol free and filled with glee. The feelings of congestion and general wackness are leaving my body. I think the allergy fever/cold/whatever this is has run its course and I should be good in the morning. Here's to me feeling normal again and not in some allergy fever haze, not being able to taste my food. Hate that. Hate that Megatron is a JET in the new Transformers movie. Thank you Michael Bay for destroying my childhood memories. I will not support, no matter how "cool" it looks. I will stick with the original animated movie from 1986 and be happy. (yikes, was it really that long ago?) I also own the soundtrack and used to have the movie poster hanging proudly on my wall...back in the day, back-back in the day. So we took a trip with Max to the doctor today after his mom discovered "something" in his ear, complete with blood. It turned out to be the tip of a pencil crayon. Max told us that one of his classmates at school did it. Maybe he did, maybe he didn't. There's been some issues. We are taking him out of there and finding a new school for him. I hate to take him away from his friends but he'll be okay and make new ones just fine. Why is it so freakin' HUMID? Whine whine whine...it's annoying already. It's almost 10:30 and it feels like it's 85 degrees in this biz-notch. So aside from taking Max to the hospital, I've had an amazing day of unproductivity, complete with doing absolutely nothing and a splash of zip-zero-nada thrown in for good measure. It's been GREAT, thank you for asking. You don't wanna turn your back on me, when you least expect it, I come with the wicked method....(sorry, Cypress Hill, love it).....I'm creepin' on ya, with the red light beamin' on ya! That's from another great album...their 3rd project Temples Of Boom...woooo....crazy crazy good. Dark, dusty, moody Muggs production....OH!.....one of my favorite lines from B-Real off the track "Illusions"..."some people tell me that I need help...some people can fuck off and go to hell!" LOVE IT. Really, what's not to love? Random useless musical nugget of nothingness - Q-Tip did the remix on the single, an odd choice as much as I love him. Two blogs in a row and we're going to have our showcase showdown following these annoucements! I had Thursday off - took Max to school, came home, made breakfast and watched THE PRICE IS RIGHT. There's nothing I love better. Okay, there is...but we won't get into that right this very second. Get your walk on...walk walk and don't stop...walk this way....and while you're doing all that - STAY FLY on the real to real. Miracle cures for allergy fevers happen every day. F L Y . . . . .

CHANGING LIVES since APRIL 16th, 2007

2007-07-13T19:50:00.000-07:00

I am a blog slacker. A slacker of blogs. Get your slack on cause clearly the blog has not been on. Sunday was the last blog and now it's Friday. What in the HELL is going on here? I'll tell you what's been going on. In two words: ALLERGY fucking FEVER. Oopsie, that was three words. It reached 100 degrees in Seattle in this week. ONE HUNDRED DEGREES. Move girl, I light ya ass on fire, I light dat ass on fire. Ree to tha dic and it don't stop. So the hundred degree weather came in and my apartment turned into a SAUNA. Need a hot towel? IGOTCHOO. It was insanely hot. The extreme heat caused me to catch the infamous allergy fever. Sinus issues GALORE. AWF to tha UL. Awful awful awful...would wish it upon no one, unless of course you don't have a flat iron...I might wish it upon you then. BAM!!!!!! To quote Sticky Fingerz from ONYX - but wait-wait-wait it gets worse! The allergies have somehow transformed into what feels like a cold. I don't know what what's going on with me so my plan is to heavily medicate myself tonight and keep my fingers, toes and eyes (Hi Stacie!...I just bit your style!) crossed that I'm feeling better in the morning. These health issues are f'in with ya boy. Not cool. Whining session over and complete. Thank you for reading or skipping over all of it to where you're reading right now. I was watching a VH1 special about celebrities and their mansions that they buy. Depressing....not that I am really DYING to own a 7 million dollar home with a 30 thousand dollar a month mortgage...I just want an iPhone. I know that I can not get one. Not now at least. It has taken me almost a week to come to this conclusion but I know it's the right decision for me right now. But motherFUCKER I want one BAD!!!!! I went to my favorite record store on the planet (Easy Street) Tuesday to snatch up the new Mark Ronson album...and they couldn't find it. They had to search the entire store to locate it and finally called me back at work an hour later to say they found it. In the meantime, I broke down and bought the Dizzee Rascal album which turns out to NOT be on the level of greatness that is LADY SOVEREIGN. Shame. There's some good tracks on it but you can listen to Public Warning non-stop for days on end and not get tired of it. Tylenol Cold is in full effect. So back to Mark Ronson - good, very very good. I predict it'll be a slow burner of an album, picking up speed, sales and popularity over the next couple months. Amy Winehouse went platinum and that NEVER happens anymore. Jay-Z has said that 600,000 is "the new platinum"...that's only cause his most recent material is just so-so and no one was checking for it. Know what I wasn't checking for? That new Kanye West single. Hated it...and now I've ended up liking the damn thing. Did I mention I want an iPhone so bad that I would take out one of my eyes and give it to Stevie Wonder? What in the HELL do they put in Tylenol Cold anyway?? Tylenol Cold? Tylenol CRACK! May I remind you that this is random babbling? Babble young man babble. Alright, I've got nothing more to say at this point...perhaps inspiration will hit me later. I'm off to go read a competing blog, complete with BEER in the GARAGE. No fair! Time for a bowl of Honey Smacks......ohh! One final whine in closing - my allergy was so bad I couldn't taste anything I was eating for 24 hours. I'm eating noodles with hot sauce, eggs and salsa - nothing. Wick-wick-wack. And on that note we say PEACE. Give it to me now - STAY FLY.............

I mean I'VE LOST my MIND...I can't FIND IT

2007-07-08T21:09:00.000-07:00

Consuming large quantities of alcohol will give you a hang over. End of story. If you happen to be mixing up the Travis drink (Bacardi Razz, Sprite ZERO, grenadine with lime) and then add on top of that multiple martinis in the form of Absolut Raspberry, champagne (not you Chris!) and white grape juice - I guarantee, you will wake up at 5 o'clock the next morning with bastardized pain in the highest degree sitting right behind your eyeballs. The room may spin from time to time. You may feel like the walking dead. You may still feel intoxicated jumping into your car at nine in the morning. Oh, and I'd recommend steering clear of parking lots the next day too. There are cars in there that are parked, but it will appear like they are moving, causing you to jump and steer clear of the non-moving vehicle. It will also cause you to drive around in parking lots looking for the perfect parking spot, when you know damn well you should just take the first spot you see...even if it isn't right next to a curb. My poor rim...daddy loves you. Now I know what you're thinking - how could I possibly possess such valuable information? Please, please, don't thank me - it's a gift. This evening, with the champagne gone, we dine on ONE Absolut Raspberry and white grape juice martini. Swear to you I will not have a second. Not tonight anyway. Sometimes these blogs will have little random sprinklings of badness, evilness, nasty-esque ramblings...it's just how I doooo. Believe me, I'm a guy that's more than happy right about now (not cause of the alcohol) but sometimes I just gotta unload. For example (oh, did we REALLY need an example?) you parents - you muthafuckaz right there - the ones not holding your childs hand when you are navigating through a parking lot. Cars are parked...yes. Cars back out...yes. Cars will back out and run over your child running wild in parking lot...yes. And the next kid I see on those g'damn rolly shoes is gonna get accidently tripped. Oopsie. There, I'm done...and that was two examples. So sorry, but it's how I doooo. BALLERS!!!!! Alright then, moving right along to the sickest peice of technology I've ever laid my hands on - the iPhone. Don't believe it's sick?...walk into a Mac store and mess around with one for TWO minutes. Still don't believe me? I will arrange a top secret meeting with The Warrior Of Chaos, father of Grace, man of Beth. He says it's the best $600 he's ever spent. He says if it could also double as the remote control for his tv, he'd be set. He says he was going to buy a laptop but guess what? He's not going to now cause the iPhone fucking does EVERYTHING. I went over to his place this afternoon with Max (thanks for the pizza!!) to mess around more in-depth with it and I am totally and completely sold on it. It phases out everything you think is so great now. Your new cell phone? A paper weight. That new iPod you got? Yesterday's news. It's insanely amazing. Not only did Mac top themselves once again but they also managed to phase out their own video iPods. BANANAS. I'm nursing this drink, gimme a second here cause clearly I'm not babbling fast enough. One more thing to bitch about - the 90+ degree temperatures we'll be experiencing this week. Oh, you think it's great? Come sleep at my place and we'll see how great it is. Curtains on the windows unite! Max has now watched Stars Wars, The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi...multiple times. He is now officially ME at age 5 and I couldn't be happier about it. I would be happier if I could find the new Dizzee Rascal for less than $18.99. I love my music...but not THAT much. Did I mention how SICK the iPhone is? I could vomit with delight right now. And on that note, we say peace. Oh, check out www.myspace.com/markronsan - his album is out on Tuesday featuring a wicked Smiths cover and a cover of Britney Spears "Toxic" featuring Ol'Dirty Bastard. YOU HEARD. Damn that last sip made me cough. Can I get some fries to go with that shake? On the real, thanks for tuning once again and on the real to real to REAL - stay fly...........

WHEN I SEE you CRY, yeah it MAKES me SMILE

2007-07-04T21:27:00.000-07:00

I go ahead and smile. Happy 4th of July to you and yours. It's been a whirlwind of a non-stop day for Max and I. Out the door a little after 10, headed over to 2 parks in West Seattle, then onto the beach at Alki. Had 2 slices of pizza, overlooking the water, as this sick sick sick white convertible Benz with matching white rims rolled by. DROOL. Oh, and I jacked up my right front rim on a high curb parking before we even got to the parks. It's really not that bad...kinda like if Wolverine was Mini-Wolverine, he would have taken out a small chunk of my rim with his adamantium claws. Shall I call you Logan, Weapon X? Nah, Wolverine...SHNICKY SHNICKY!! Really, if you haven't at least watched Mallrats once, you might wanna get on that. Classic. One of the funniest movies ever made and mad quotable. Kevin Smith brilliance. I think dude has pretty much lost it. How do you go and take your debut, Clerks, and make a sequel out of it? REEE-DIC, especially when it's not that great. It's not like he went the Empire route. It was more along the lines of, I've made some classics, now I think I'll go and make Episode I and II cause I really wanna fuck up my legacy. Speaking of, I watched The Empire Strikes Back...with Max! I've been trying to get him to watch it since he was 2....or 3...maybe 3 and a half, but he had no interest in it. He really likes Yoda, especially the scene where Yoda sneaks up on Luke and Luke is about to bust a laser blaster cap in him and Yoda's like "put your weapon away!" Max laughs and laughs...it's awesome. He also knows not to watch when Luke envisions himself battling Vadar and he takes Vader's head off...but it's his own head! Smart boy, great fucking movie. F-word count so far, 3 or 4. Oh, who really gives a....*ding ding ding*...fuck. Target, which I also visited with Max today, did not have the new Dizzee Rascal...but, they did have Lily Allen so I snatched that up for 10 bones. Whut?! I've had a copy but if I like something enough, I'll put down that ca$h money and pay for the damn album. It's a goodie. Mark Ronson (producer of half of Amy Winehouse) produces one track on here and also remixes Smile, which you've probably heard or seen the video for. Brilliant stuff. Anyways, dude has a solo album coming out which is mostly covers if I remember correctly which hiphopsite.com reviewed and they said it was great. Guests include Ol'Dirty Bastard, Amy Winehouse, Robbie Williams and Lily Allen. Bands covered include The Smiths, Radiohead, Coldplay and Britney Spears "Toxic". Yes, I did not make that up, nor have I been drinking THAT much. Sounds fucking (ding! ding! ding!) dope to me. I hear sounds of fireworks and all that crap in the distance, but nothing outside my window. NICE. I really can not STAND that shit. Pretty? Yes. Outside of where I live? You'll catch a bad one. I'm just sayin'. Look, it's been a real pleasure to sit here and type all this out for all eight of Y'ALL but I gotz to go.....YOUUUU KNOW?! Why do I have to go to work tomorrow? Oh, and why, if I frequent a store A LOT can't I get free shit? Like, on every 10th visit to Target, I wanna be able to fill up a cart and just roll out, not a dime dropped. C'mon Target, hook me up! I spend good money in your stores...MAN! Oh, and if someone could find out who does that song in some of their commercials, I would love it - "a little bit more, a little bit more...a little bit more, a little bit more". I don't know what it is but it's got to be funky. Look, this is all I got...for real this time. I mean it. No more. At least for tonight. Until tomorrow or the next day or the next day, always remember....oh, you know the drill...STAY FLY. Period. Pointblank. I'm out. SO FLY.........

YOUR SILLY NONSENSICAL GAME is ALL THROUGH

2007-07-03T21:31:00.000-07:00

Towel on the small window? Check. Big ass blanket on the big window? Check. Drink mixxed up? Check. Blog about to get rolling up in this bizotch once again? CHECK CHECK. To all the white trash about to blow off parts of their hand lighting off fireworks, enjoy. The fingers go flying and I keep on laughing. Evil. A bit NUT-E. Shout out to The Warrior Of Chaos who, in less than 2 weeks, will be making me jealous out of my SKULL with his new iPhone. If I got an iPhone and I couldn't get it to activate, would I be pissed? Probably. Then I'd look down, realize that I got a g'damn muthafuckin' iPhone and raise it towards the sky as an offering to BIG BABY JESUS. WuTang is for the children. Bring the ruckus. TIGER STYLE. So fly. So I'm reading through Entertainment Weekly, which is one of the few mag's I can read cover to cover, and they have a review of the new Dizzee Rascal album "Maths & English". I've always known about dude but the material I've heard has been too deep into the grime/garage/whatever the hell that sound is. Anyways, this album is apparently more hip hop, I jump onto iTunes, and sure enough - his album sounds a lot like Lady Sovereign. Guest spot from Lily Allen (dope, makes me smile) on "Wanna Be" and the majority of the remaining material sounds wicked. Gonna either download or check out a copy asap. C'mon hip hop. Wake dat azz UP. Let's get those BPM's past 70 or 80. Everything is soooo SLOW. Talkin' loud and ain't sayin' NUTHIN'. No joke...I'm melting....it's hotter than a muthafunka up in here!! 80+ degrees today...supposed to be more of the same tomorrow. At least it's not raining on my car. WORD! I found the Max dvd we made for an xmas gift 2-3 years ago. "Maxwell - The First 967 Days". Gonna check that out after I get finished with this...features Max from little baby to little boy. Also captures him saying "Baird! Baird!"....yeah...he called me "Baird" before he called me "Daddy". Dammit. Too funny. Can I switch it up here for just a second? I gotta find something where I can use my damn talents. I feel like I am spinning my wheels and going nowhere fast in life currently. That's not a good thing. I wanna go to work, get a little creative, and come home feeling like I actually accomplished something with substance. Is that too much to ask? Is it? Bartender, another drink for the good man. It was Canada Day on July 1st...it passed me by without a second thought. Maybe I'll go for that citizenship but I really need that out for Max - he's fighting in no war. Hell to the no. Not happening. Did I mention it's hot. Missy Elliott might say "I'm really really hot". Billy Idol might say "Hot in the city, hot in the city tonight...tonight!" Nelly might say....oh fuck Nelly. That's my word, you're gettin' SERVED!! New Public Enemy album out in August. If I may quote the mighty Fu-Schnickens from their second album - "don't snore, don't snore, watch ya back door". Could I possibly babble anymore? Stop it. Knock it off. I leave you off with a Michael Jackson kick while biting my bottom lip. KA-BLAM! What's up now?! Oh, you didn't know? Really? F-L-Y all day, every day. Cheers to you and yours.....

RETURN of the PRODUCT

2007-06-30T21:17:00.000-07:00

Return of the product...of the environment. Was my last blog really on Tuesday? TUESDAY?! It's eons ago! Oh well, make the best of it, mix yourself up some white grape juice and Skyy Berry and call me in the morning. 8:30? It's so early! I am fighting back...fighting back against the sun that seems to rise and wake me up every g'damn morning at 5 o'clock. Really sun? Really 5 o'clock? Not cool. I have blinds but I have no curtains. I need curtains. I think I may have mentioned in a past blog that it's darker in my room with the blinds OPEN than it is when they are CLOSED. Well I'm not going to take it anymore. *pause to sip drink* Delicious. I have push pins and I have towels and blankets and they are now covering the two windows in the bedroom. So clever. So fly. *pause to sip drink again* Maxwell is back, and apart from a slight sunburn on his face, seems to be all in one piece. We went to the Pacific Science Center to see the IMAX dinosaur film for a 3rd time (it's how we doo!) and he rode on some rides at Seattle Center, had lunch, hung out at my place, then headed over to this little park in Renton (not crazy ass Coulon) which is on Lake Washington and it's got this little beach area and playground and no one is ever there. I love it. (DAMN that was a fucking long run-on sentence!!) Max fell asleep tonight in a record breaking 5 minutes so I was a happy daddy. It was very odd to not have him around for so long. I'd like to say I feel re-charged but mr.sun is f'in with the kid. Did anyone see the BET Awards? Normally I wouldnt tune in but apparently Public Enemy closed out the show with a tribute to James Brown. DOPE. I'm sure it's up on youtube, I just haven't checked yet. iPhone is out now and I still want one. They're sick. They make me want to throw up and hurl with joy. Have you seen anything like it before? No. No, you have not. Watch as every other cell phone maker trys to play catch up and then they'll try and say it's better than the iPhone. Good luck with that fuckers. Damn, you are so grumpy and mean! I'm not. I just think it's funny that every critic has something to say about the iPhone - trust me, it will set the standard of how a cell phone should be....and this is only first generation. Check out the new model a year from now. Shit will probably hover next to your ear when you're talking for 5000 minutes. Get down, get down, party time. Damn, forgot about my drink...hold up!!...wait a minute! TASTY. Tomorrow, more outdoor time at the park, at the beach, whatever my boy wants to do. It really and truly is all about him and whatever he wants. No major malfunctions here. We stay fly on the real to real. The sun is down now and it's extra dark in my room...love it. Who's the boss now mr.sun?! Me! Me! Dat's who! Who needs to buy curtains? ME! So I guess I'll close off here. If you've been reading this not under the influence of alcohol - shame on you - pour yourself a little sumthin' sumthin'...you'll thank me later. This is how we doo...almost every damn day so bear witness and above all, press rewind if I haven't blown ya mind - STAY FLY..........

I'M in PARADISE NOW

2007-06-26T23:27:00.000-07:00

When you leave, take me with you. Get your face off of the screen. Write anything that comes to mind. Quickly. Type type type muthafunkaz! It's 31 minutes until midnight. The pressure is on but like Erick Sermon on his first solo album after the break up of EPMD - No Pressure. Is my signal coming in okay? Can you hear me now? Shut the fuck up little Verizon man! How much longer can they possibly keep THAT going? Verizon is one of the single largest contributors to the republikkkan party. True dat. Might wanna cancel that contract. I'm just sayin' though. Where has Teen Titans gone? Max and I would watch it all the time and there's been no new episodes in about a year now. Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a kids cartoon advisor. Max is doing good by the way, he went swimming today and is looking forward to coming home to stay with daddy and watch the IMAX dinosaur movie again and go to Gameworks. Word to my Maxwell. I'm typing as fast as I can, gimme a break. 27 minutes until midnight...chillin' at AM/PM....coolin' drinkin' apple juice in Evil's B-M...(Ice-T reference, sorry) So, how's everyone doing tonight? All 8 of you!! WHUT UP?! Howyoudoodat?! Why am I not sleeping? My eyes are going to burn in the morning. They'll be screaming at me saying, hey stupid bastard, go to bed a little earlier. And I'll say, fuck you eyes, I'm the boss. Shut up, drink your mocha and be happy. Delicious. I'm trying to cut back on the evils of caffeine. Instead of a 12oz tomorrow - 8oz. Always thinking. Always thinking. So clever. So tired. This blog is all over the damn place. People who once said you're a good writer will never read this blog again....and then what? I'll be down to possibly 3 or 4 people reading it. Readership, not that great. Can I get some beer in a keg from your garage? No? It's all gone? Who could have possibly drank it all?? Pass the champagne. Pass the champagne. Actually, the temptation to eat a big bowl of Honey Smacks is definitely a possibility. What's not to like? Puffed wheat coated in sugar! Nothing like getting your heart racing right as you're wanting to go to sleep. 21 minutes until midnight. I'll probably wake up tomorrow at around....6 in the morning, police at my door, fresh Adidas squeakin' cross the bathroom floor...out the back window to make my escape, didn't even get a chance to grab my old school tape. (sorry, Ice-T again) So I think my job is done here for this evening. I really must catch mad zed's. DOOITDOOITDOOIT. Hungry for Honey Smacks. That g'damn frog and his honey smacks! In closing, I'd like to remind all of you that is highly advisable to stay fly all day every day. YA HEARD?! I'm out.....zzzzz aka:zedzedzedzedzed........

Shhh...I CAN HEAR you BREATHING

2007-06-25T21:32:00.000-07:00

Quiet down over there! Don't you know that some people are trying to work? Or in this case, trying to eat 7 tacos and 4 beers? Hey, it's HOWWEDOO so do it do it do it. Shout out to my man The Warrior Of Chaos who almost spits out coffee onto his keyboard reading my blogs. I swear I did not mean to steal that mans parking space. I felt awful. Must have apologized a record breaking 4 or 5 times. Wanted to buy him....a NEW CAR! I wonder what Bob Barker is doing...right...this...minute? Probably laid up with Dian Parkinson. Hey lady, roll Bobby another blunt! I really did eat 7 tacos. Sue me. I threw together a mix tonight. Ready for this line up? You're not ready. Chaka Khan & Rufus, De La Soul & Carl Thomas, Lauryn Hill, The Spinners, Common & D'Angelo, Michael Jackson, Guru & Angie Stone, Prince, Dr.Dre & Mary J Blige, Timbaland & Aaliyah, Kanye West, D'Angelo, Beyonce, Talib Kweli & Faith Evans, Alicia Keys, LL Cool J & Boys II Men and Erykah Badu. Number one - I am ready for another Alicia Keys album. Number two - ummm...crap, I just lost thought number two. Paging thought number two. Where you at? HOLLAATCHABOY!!! I wonder what the paycheck for Prince looked like from Verizon. Lots of 0's. DOLLAR DOLLAR BILLS Y'ALL!! Did I mention I saw Knocked Up yesterday? No, of course not, because I posted nothing since Saturday. Knocked Up was great. Very funny, perfect casting, I really really liked it. You know what I didn't like? Shrek 3. But I think I already talked about that one so let's move on. I wonder what Boys II Men are doing...right...this...minute? Doing a little east coast swing perhaps? Dammit, what was that number two point I was gonna make??? The thought escapes me. Oh, but to jump back to The Warrior Of Chaos for a second - his daughter Grace aka: Baby G, aka: G'ed Up From The Feet Up, aka: Ain't Nuthin' But A G Thing, aka: G style is 4 months now and growing like crazy. I saw pics of her today with her mom Beth down at Seaside and was just blown away. WHERE does the time go? Or, to quote Axl, where do we go? Where do we go now? Where do we go? So shout out to Baby G! I see you there. Your daddy is going to buy the iPhone to make Uncle Baird jealous but he promises to still send you to college. So where have all the big summer blockbuster movies gone? Spider-Man 3 and Shrek 3 aren't even in the top 10 anymore and Pirates is near the bottom. It'll be interesting to see what kinda $$$$$ Transformers will bring in. More than meets the eye bizotches!! So that's about all I got for this evening. I'd recommend you get yourself 7 tacos and some beer and make an evening out of it, then make a mix cd and write about it in your blog for the entire planet to read...or in this case, around 8 people. I am living the dream man!!! Hey keep it down over there! On the real to real, you know the drill - STAY FLY - 24/7/365.....

SHAKEN not STIRRED AFTERNOON

2007-06-23T15:53:00.000-07:00

This is how it's going down. Back in the building y'all. Jazzy Jeff and CL Smooth playing in the background, sun shining down where they claimed there would be rain, and your host - me - up in this mutha sippin' on Skyy Berry and white grape fruit juice. Not too bad. Gotta experiment with this one a bit. So Max is off with his mom for a week and I'm Max-less. I got a pic of him on the train, looking out the window. Great stuff. I know he's excited to go and he said he'd miss me so that's all good. When I'm with him next week at this time it'll be just that much better. My martini glass I'm drinking out of has this blue swirl that goes around the glass...FLY. You know how we do it. Comin' from the westside, westside. It's hittin' on the westside, westside. So after dropping off Max, I went and got gas and was delighted to fill up the Passat for an almost even 40 bucks. That's the cheapest it has been in months. Hopefully a pattern will start occuring. Sat in Starbucks, drinking an orange mocha, reading Seattle Weekly. It was nice to just chill for a bit on my own. Then I went to Fred Meyer to go grocery shopping. I see a spot. PRIME spot. Away from carts and other cars - the best spot on the lot. I'm clearly not paying attention to anything else but the spot and zip right in. I'm grabbing my stuff, about to get out when I hear this tap-tap-tap. An older gentlemen is standing outside my car so I open my door. I took his spot. He had been waiting, I wasn't paying attention, and I took his spot! I felt like an idiot. I apologized, explaining that it was not intentional, and told him I would move so he could have the spot. He refused, telling me that he would find another one across the way and that I was a real gentleman in the way I handled the situation. I wait until he parks, get out and shake his hand on the way into the store, telling him how stupid I feel. He again repeated how nice I was about everything and not to worry - "you're a nice young man". I guess proof of that was me getting ID'ed for the beer in the store and again over at the liquor store when I picked up my Skyy and some more Bacardi Razz. Bottomline - pay attention to what the hell you're doing. Don't become a victim of not-paying-attention-itis. Criminal minded, you've been blinded, lookin' for a style like mine, you can't find it. I ain't no joke, I used to let the mic smoke. 1989, the number, another summer, get down, sound of the funky drummer! Once I got home from the store, I made lunch and threw on one of my old vhs tapes with a bunch of old hip hop videos...came across this 3rd Bass spotlight from RapCity...so dope. All their videos and interview snippets from Serch and Daddy Rich (not sure where Pete Nice was at)....glad I still have those joints on tape. Classic classic...better than I ever been...timeless timeless. Max tagged up his leg before he left for his trip. Normally he'll grab my Sharpie (non-toxic) and write "Max" on his leg. Today, he wrote "Daddy". That should be there for a couple days. Hell to the yeah, that's my boy. So I hope you're having a good Saturday. Remember that tomorrow is the lord's day and you wanna praise the lord. Can I get an amen? Amen. Ah praise the lord ah praise the lord. God bless you and big baby jesus. On the real to real what the deal? I babble like this, I babble like that, I babble with the whiffle ball bat soooo.....in closing, get yourself some Skyy Berry and check the website - skyy.com - to mix some ish up. Do it do it do it. I'm gonna mix myself up another right about now so may big baby jesus be with you. I know it's only Saturday...I'm just sayin' though! IGOTCHOO! Stay fly all day every day.....

THA BIGGY-IGGY-BLOG DAMN DIGGY!

2007-06-22T21:33:00.001-07:00

And now may I present to you, a 180 from last night's blog. Drum roll please....KA-BLAM! Yes yes y'all and ya don't stop. Hold up...actually, we gotta stop, only for a moment....just so....I can get...something...to DRINK. Get UR drink on. This is totally unscripted. OHHH MOMMY! Stella Artois anyone? That's nice. I could have used one of these when I was watching everyone in animated form, go through the motions in Shrek 3 - not that I was a fan of the first 2, although the 2nd one was pretty damn funny in parts. What's important is that Max liked it. "That was totally awesome dad...high five!" Nothing makes me happier than moments like that. My mind was wandering through out the movie. Near the end, it was just really hard to concentrate. Concentrate...concentrate. Wonder how many copies XZIBIT's last album sold? "Concentrate" slams. Roll out with that...BUMP BUMP BUMP. So are Tupac and Johnny Cash just kickin' it right about now? Why is there no new music coming out anymore that I'm interested in?? It has been MONTHS since I have bought something new. I've heard of NOTHING new coming out this summer that even sparks my interest. The times in the music business they are a changin'. Plans for this weekend include a whole lot of nothing. I will be Max-less for the next week which will be really, really, really, really odd - but I suppose I can use that time as a break, not that I really need one...or maybe I do and I just don't know it yet. So I backed the Passat up into a freaking WALL this morning when I was parking. Just a slight tap, wasn't going fast or anything but got out and felt like a complete idiot. Me, freak about my vehicle (I can admit it) and I back it up into a wall. Smooth. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta. Damn I don't like the allergy fever. The congestion is coming and going and it's messin' with the kid...nothing a cold bottle of Stella won't fix though. Word'em up. Word to your cat(s). Word to your uncle. Whose house? RUN'S HOUSE!!!!! I ate chocolate today that made my teeth hurt...thanks mommy. Like I said, totally and completely unscripted. Just when you think I'm going in one direction I bust a left and head in another. Where is Dave Chappelle? Charlie Murphy, would you like some pancakes? Tomorrow, I'm gonna get me some g'damn Lucky Charms...and some Honey Smacks?....Sugar Smacks? Smack-e-smack-smacks? Whatever they're called - the puffed wheat coated in sugar. Gimme some of THAT! You can get with this or you can get with that...you can get with this cause this is where it's at. Go listen to Black Sheep "A Wolf In Sheep's Clothing" - damn fine album, one that kinda sat in the shadows of A Tribe Called Quest and De La Soul - even if there was more to them than "The Choice Is Yours" and "Flavor Of The Month". I think they had 4 singles off that joint - unheard of today. Think about it. Jay-Z, biggest rapper on the planet, head of Def Jam, releases his last album and had...what?....2 singles? 2 videos? Oh, and that was my point - Black Sheep had the singles AND the videos to go along with them. Record labels actually used to take the time to work a project over time instead of the album being "done" in 3 to 4 weeks. Thank you Stella and Absolut Mandarin for contributing greatly to this ramble...but it's unscripted - the real deal. You've never met anyone like me in your LIFE. Microphone checka, one-two-checka. I wonder what DAS EFX are doing...right.....NOW? So if we put the iggy here and the diggy here, we should have a hit. Shhhhit, if Bone Thugs N Harmony can come back, you KNOW that a DAS EFX comeback album is right around the corner....and I would LOVE IT. Their first one is praised as a classic, and rightfully so, but their second joint - Straight Up Sewaside - OHMYGGGGAWD, I played tha SHHHIT out that album!! No joke! CLASSIC to me. Classic. Had to spell it again. Looks funny all in caps. Thank you again to our special guests, Stella and Absolut...wanna thank you for coming through. Lucky Charms, we'll get to your punk azz tomorrow. Hold ya head. Represent to the fullest. And dammit, above all - STAY FLY. You know the drill...YA HEARD?!

LUCKY CHARMS

2007-06-21T21:24:00.000-07:00

I am sick to death of the bullshit. Here he goes again scaring people to death. Unfortunately, no green clovers or purple horseshoes at the moment. I'll get back to it...maybe in this blog, but for now allow me to say: EFF THE BULLSHIT. I will call you on it time and time again. The darkness just tried calling me. The power of rejection is something else. You can get the finger. What finger? The middle. Are you going to make that change or are you just going to keep babbling, talking loud and ain't sayin' NUTHIN'. Round and round and round we go. You need to step it up with a quickness - consequences can be a muthafucka man. Where is that happy face? On vacation, just for a second, I swear. My therapist is closing down shop after 25 years and moving to the mid-west to be with her sister in law who is dying of cancer. How sad. I enjoyed building with her, facing my demons, and coming out of it a spectacular human being. I'm a good one. I always have been, but I'm extra fucking good now. Sometimes you just wanna hit delete....or in this case, again with the darkness, the reject button is wonderful. It feels so good. Why do I have to deal with all this crap? Why am I walked on and taken advantage of time and time again? The gloves are off. I am stronger and, quite honestly, don't have time, not a second, to deal with this. You rub me the wrong way, you're gettin' dumped on. You come at me twisted, dumped on. I don't wanna have to...you think I like feeling like this? I feel all fucked up right about now, stressed the fuck out, ulcers coming back...catch a heart attack and put your back up against the wall. You can get it, get it, get it...yeah. So tired, worn down, worn out....and yet, reinvigorated and recharged and ready to roll out. This week has been a mixed bag. When it's been good, it has been off the scales of good. When it's been bad, really, I feel like I'm gonna snap. How much more of this can I possibly take? How much longer must I be subjected to this kind of behavior. I just really needed to get this out. Nothing happy about it and I apologize. I like the kinds of blogs where I'm a rambling, alcohol influenced mess. But it's a fun mess. This is just a mess. I'm not mr.friendly, I can be a prick, if you tempt me my tank gets on empty, no patience is in me and if you offend me I'm liftin' you 10 feet in the air, I don't care.............but I do. I care about my boy. I care about him above anything on the planet. You mess with him, you're messing with me and you don't want that. Really? You don't want that. It's my responsibility, one that I take seriously, to make sure that he is cared for and loved in every way possible. He knows I love him, now more than ever. There's no time like the present to make yourself a better person, in some way, shape or form. I strive for that, striving for that happiness. I can see it, feel it and know that I am well on my way. Thanks for reading and stay fly. Capital F, capital L, capital Y. You heard..................

FISTFUL of STEEL

2007-06-18T22:03:00.000-07:00

Whut up? Guess what? I have been divorced since May 7th. Oh, you didn't know? NEITHER DID I. It's kinda like the icing on the cake after the past 48 hours of hell I've had to go through. It's a wonderful feeling though, I have to say. Overjoyed could be a word to describe it. Watch out for those buses though. Careful now. Know your enemy. So now that I've got that ish out of the way, a big fat CONGRATULATIONS goes out to my main man Chris Champagne and the lovely Eveliina. He popped the question while on vacation in Phuket. Is that perfection or what? It goes without saying I wish them nothing but the absolute best. I met Eveliina two summers ago while I was in Helsinki and she compliments my man perfectly. CHEERS to the both of you as I raise my glass of wine in your direction. Ladies ladies ladies...if you've got hair that goes past the middle part of your back...if you're got hair that's all the way down to dat azz...for real for real, you need to cut that shit. I'm just sayin' though. What a damn day. I move past it, focused on the future (which appears to be bright times a million) and stay fly...stay fly. Dammit, I missed Hell's Kitchen. Hey, are you a good communicator? You're not? You like to keep everything inside and expect people to read your mind? You can catch an F to the YOU. Why is something so simple so impossible for people? Why is the sky blue and the grass green? Why is my glass empty? We have ways of dealing with these kinds of issues. I've been Ambien-free for a good week now, if not more, and I sleep better than I have in a long time. Gotta get some curtains for this joint though. I swear it's BRIGHTER with the blinds OPEN than it is when they are SHUT. Annoying early morning sunshine and/or birds chirping. Die birdy die. I've been a vegetarian for a good 16+ years now, I am allowed to wish for one little bird to die. Eat your chiken nuggets with a big ol' smile on your face. Dippin' in that bbq sauce. That's real white meat. No, for real, I swear! I got a happy meal for you, c'mere...! Look, I'm just sayin'...IGOTCHOO. WHUTITDOO WHUTITDOO?! Ninjaaaa!! Where all my NINJAS at?! A ninja with a vacuum cleaner is no joke son! I leave you off now with evidence from Saturday evening....HOWWEDOO....stay F to the L to the Y.....all day, every day........

ENTER the DRAGON

2007-06-17T21:45:00.000-07:00

Party people...in the place to be....can I get an amen? AMEN. 24 hours ago it was ON. Bounced over to the eastsiiiiide to kick it with SamMan and Serafin and we did the damn thing up RIGHT. Go our eat on, our drink on AND our smoke on. Smoked a fatty sumthin' sumthin' that Serafin brought over, drank a little more of that VSOP (it's how I dooooo) then lit up a CUBAN to complete the evening. Also dined on this chocolate decadence cake which was more like a torte....and muthafucka, you better cut that with a warm knife!! DO IT DO IT DO IT...uh huh. Something about the drive home, feeling just fine with Joss Stone coming out the speakers, that made everything a-o-k. Good evening sheriff. Happy Father's Day to ME. Happy Father's Day to SamMan...Serafin...The Warrior Of Chaos...T-Diggy fa-shiggy-iggy-iggy....and you, if you happen to be a father reading this. Yeah, all 8 of you muthafuckaz reading this. BOO-YA, you're lookin' at her from the rear. So yesterday evening was good...24 hours ago, damn good....and it was made all the more better when a NINJA, dressed in black, came out onto the balcony and was, in my mind, about to do some damage with a vacuum cleaner. N I N J A ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! That's how he rolls. He had two other peeps over there with him...but they weren't ninjas. You kinda wonder, behind the closed doors, behind the shades, could that dude really be plotting and refining and perfecting his ninja skillz? SKILLZ with a ZED...whut?! We all dressed in black, we snuck up around the back.....EGG MAN!!!!! Damn the Beastie Boys "Paul's Boutique" album is a GREAT fooking record. That's one of those albums that DEMANDS a re-release, all re-mastered and pretty but probably will never happen due to all the samples they'd have to clear. Shame. So it is Father's Day and make no mistake about it, I was heated for a good six hours of it. No need to go into details but here's the bottom line, and check yourself before you wreck yourself, I am one of the best father's on the planet. I know how to love and care for my child. I know what my priorities are and where they are AT. I got people who I don't even talk to any more reminding me of what a great father I am. I can say and repeat it over and over again cause, to quote Brother Ali, "the truth is here, the truth is here". If I wanted to take it back 10 years I could quote The X-Files (damn I miss that show) and say "the truth is out there". But it's whatever. I know how great of a father I am. I know what MY priorities are in regards to my son. I don't babble about that. I back those words UP. This ain't no game or no kind of fucking joke. Watch it. You might catch a bad one. 2 minutes after 10 and I think that's about all that really needs to be said on this fine Sunday evening. So drink a little somethin'...a little wine...maybe a little champagne...a shot or two of Absolut Mandarin...pour yourself a nice glass of VSOP and just do the damn thing. Oh, and shout out to Champagne and Eveliina (MIKROWAVE!!) who are in Phuket this very minute. Cheers to you from Seatown - this is how we get down. Stay fly....stay fly....stay fly....stay fly................

ALLERGY FEVER

2007-06-16T10:47:00.000-07:00

Attention! This just in! Allergy fever is sweeping the nation! I must have woken up four or five times last night. Why? The allergy fever of course. If you don't know about it you better get up on it. Oh shit doctor, I think I might have the allergy fever! There is no known cure. Except french toast. That cures everything. Actually it's a combo - french toast and the Fugees "The Score" album. When's the last time you listened to it? You don't own a copy? Liar. Everyone does. They sold a ba-zillion copies of that mutha. So a couple blogs ago I went off about how good Rakim is...and he IS....but I'll be damned if Lauryn Hill doesn't give him and everyone else who has ever touched a mic, a run for their money. Lauryn is nasty. She's one of those emcee's that tops herself with every additional verse. Listen to any of her rhymes on The Score and try and tell me she's not one of the best to ever do it. Impossible. G'damn allergy fever is effin' with the kid. Al Pacino was on Larry King yesterday for the full hour...some great insight into the man and where he came from and why he does what he does. If you don't try something, how will you ever find out if you're any good at it? He's got this dvd box set coming out with Looking For Richard (which is great) and 3 or 4 other films which he put together with his own money that were never released - until now. He also mentioned that they are going to re-release Scarface on dvd AGAIN, this time with a hip hop soundtrack. Totally and completely unnecessary but anything to make a buck I guess. Ocean's 13 was good, not spectacular, but good. Pacino and Ellen Barkin were great...of course. More symptoms of allergy fever keep on popping up...my eyes be mad itchy son! WHUT?! I got an email from Kaves from Lordz Of Brooklyn this morning...he will be designing a tattoo for me which I am very excited about. lordzofbrooklyn.com I think I may be experiencing writers block, possibly another symptom of the dreaded allergy fever. That allergy fever is no joke kid! That allergy fever be some breaking news son! I'd recommend you throw on The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill too while you're revisiting The Score. She kills it on there too. Oh, and did I mention that I got my car washed and then it got rained on the next day? Not pleased. Not happy about that but you know I gotta keep it movin'. WHUTITDOO WHUTITDOO?! Gonna get together with SamMan and Serafin later on today...an early father's day celebration for our damn selfs. Hopefully the allergy fever will not take me out by then. I'm trying to stay strong but it may be winning. This might be my last blog ever. Man dies due to the allergy fever. OH...and what up with this? A coworker said to me yesterday "Baird, lots of people like you so there would be a lot of people at your funeral". REALLY?! Really? They must know about the allergy fever and failed to mention it to me. Stay strong party people in the place to be. Ever wonder...ever think about this for a second? I grew up not having allergies. Now I do have allergies. When I got the allergies, what did I do? I went and got some Claritin. What if it's a government conspiracy - that they put just enough medicine in the Claritin to make you feel a little better, but also just enough of something else to make sure you never quite get over the allergies? Then you never quite get over the allergies and keep on buying the medicine and they make a ba-zillion dollars from the average person. Apparently, the allergy fever also makes the average person paranoid as well. Is it too early in the morning for a drink? Whether you're suffering from the allergy fever or not, I'd recommend that you stay fly all day every day. That's my word........

THINK OF THEM as an ACCESSORY

2007-06-14T21:45:00.000-07:00

Really? Really?! Alright so it's a Thursday night and my car is all washed and I conditioned the leather and I'm feeling pretty damn good about that. I also made tacos for dinner and grubbed on six of the muthasuckaz. I put it DOWN. Keep it on lock. WhutitDOO?! Stay fly movement is in full effect. So I'm glad I didn't see it when it was out and I'm glad I didn't pay money to rent it. I'd like to thank my public library for having it but I might make a recommendation when I take 'movie in question' back. A disclaimer, something to the effect of 'you've seen all the good parts in the preview' or 'not as funny as everyone and their mother said it was' I think would be very helpful. I would have seen it anyway, even with a warning label on it, but I'll be damned if BORAT was the most unfunny movie ever. Really? Not niiiiice. It's not a nice movie. It showcases rednecks who are already stupid to begin with and then laces the rest of the film with underlying negativity. While it did have some funny parts in it (the NYC subway, the driving school) it seemed like every scene was set up and just when you were about to really get into it, they changed locations. Would he REALLY have walked out of that fucking rodeo with his limbs still attached and not a mark on him? Really? Doubtful. I find many of the scenes suspect and set up and it just ran as false and hateful. But don't listen to me and don't read the warning label which I will attach to every copy of Borat I come across. I know many people who loved it...I just wasn't one of them. Moving right along....if you want funny, watch The Office. THAT is funny. Just as a sidenote, Natalie Portman wearing headphones in Garden State = hotness. It's been Lady Sovereign week - I can't stop listening to Public Warning or her Vertically Challenged EP which I just took in the Passat for the first time today. BOOM BOOM BOOM. I want my 2 dollars! I'm gonna cut this one short as I really really really really need to catch some zzz's. But fear not true believer, like the lightning I'll be there before the thunder...rock rock y'all and ya don't dare stop. Ocean's 13 this weekend and another get together with the SamMan and Serafin, complete with VSOP and cigars, is just around the corner. Funny how I say I'm going to sign off and I just keep going and going and going and going......stay fly. zzzz....oh, and to you muthafuckaz who try and talk like Borat, shut the fuck up! Niiiiiiice. Damn that was not a funny movie. It's made me very angry...no wonder dude got beat down when he was promoting it. Oh, and one final thing - I swear - Borat was weak!! No, that's not it - tomorrow is Bob Barker's last day on The Price Is Right. Somehow I will find a way to jam the ABC signal at 10 tomorrow morning and have the feed from CBS beamed in at work to every tv in the building. I'm a genius. To quote MC Ren, I'm a fuckin' mad scientist...here he goes again scaring people to death. There. Happy now? Borat STILL isn't very good and this has gone on way longer than I had expected. Do I have to tell you again? No problem - STAY FLY.

DON'T be MAD, UPS is HIRING

2007-06-12T22:16:00.000-07:00

Pack the gat a lot, the flav's about to drop. So this blog would be a considered a makegood in my little world of television. I missed doing the blog last night, so this is the still-as-fly-as-ever makegood. Let it flow, let yourself go, slow and low that is the tempo. That's the joint, that's the jam, turn that shit up and play it again. I might be getting sick. Sick of work? Sick of life? No. Sick, like might feel a cold coming on sick, but I'm fighting! Absolut and orange juice will put any bug in check...and help me to get my much needed rest. Always thinking, that Baird guy...always thinking. If I haven't recommended it before (but I know I have) please add Lady Sovereign to your music collection. There was a guy getting out of his Porsche in the garage at work when I was leaving and I kinda rolled up behind him as he was walking into the building, bumping "A Little Bit Of Shhh" which, if you have the album, you KNOW that ish BUMPS to no end. He kept on looking behind him as he was walking as if to say "please don't hurt me". I should have rolled down my window and said "I want my two dollars!!". It was very funny. Maybe you had to be there, but trust me on this one - FUNNY. Is "Better Off Dead" on dvd? It must be...seems like everything else is. Gotta get that...also gotta get that re-release of The Breakfast Club on dvd too. So many things I want, so little money. I admire from afar, thinking to myself, that is so damn fly...but I can wait. I was thinking of calling my therapist. Yes, the reason you haven't seen me (or my money for the sessions) is because you have been replaced by a blog. This is really great stuff. I feel so damn good in the last month or so. Moments of grumpy-ass behavior, combined with stress but, all in all, couldn't be much happier right about now. It's nice, coming out of where I came from. Good thing I started writing these blogs AFTER the storm hit. Wouldn't have been very fun to read and that would be wicky to the wicky-wicky wack like dat. You can get with this or you can get with that. You can get with this cause this is where it's at. I started to watch Borat tonight...saw maybe the first 20 minutes or so then turned it off. He says/does some really crazy ish in that movie. Not sure if I'll watch the rest or not...feel like I should be watching it with a big group of people, drinking rather heavily. Eyelids are getting heavy and only 3 more days until the final Price Is Right with Bob Barker. I read they're gonna air in twice, once in the morning and once at night, probably at 8 I would imagine. Alright I'm out this biz-notch. A word to the wise, on the real to real, stay fly.......(I want my two dollars!).........

TONIGHT I'M a ROCK N ROLL STAR

2007-06-10T22:04:00.000-07:00

Today was gonna be the day they were gonna throw it back to you... About 20 minutes ago, I thought I might pass out. Oh hell, he's drinking alone again. No I'm not...I'm just TIRED. I did whip up five super size tacos and consumed them with a Corona but, other than that and an after dinner Bacardi, I'm GOOD. "After Dinner Bacardi"...somebody make a note of that one. I can tell you I did absolutely NOTHING this morning. Max liked the camp out in the living room and I had no problem not tearing down camp until sometime after 11. We got our grocery shop on, had lunch, then headed back out again to Borders and Toys R Us. To you parents at Toys R Us with the children who scream like their legs are being cut off, here's a suggestion. There's this amazing invention called the internet - use it. Go to toysrus.com and stay home with your ear piercing little monsters. Oh Baird, you're so mean. Oh really get over it. Tomorrow is Monday and you know what that means? Neither do I. Another week, another dollar, makes me wanna holler. HOLLAATCHABOY!! I wonder what US3 are doing right this very minute. Biddy-biddy-bop...funky funky! Yeah, really? Not so much. The remix that Eric "Vietnam" Sadler did of Cantaloop though, THAT was funky. Got that on cassette somewhere around here. All praise be to the early hip hop releases getting proper re-release treatment. Kool G Rap & DJ Polo, Schooly D, Masta Ace...all getting that deluxe treatment, and it's about time!! Don't slip money grip, it's called word to the third. Oh, and the Beastie Boys are releasing a new album, all instrumental any day now. I heard 2 tracks from it that nearly put me to sleep. Hey kid, throw on that new Beastie Boys record...they play their instruments on it, badly. I just don't see the point. Oh, no, wait...they know they'll make a ba-zillion dollars off it....or maybe not. It'll be interesting to see I guess. I am experiencing that fading feeling again. Will post this sucker up as soon as someone tells me what Lady Kier from Deee-Lite is doing. No joke, "Dewdrops In The Garden" (their last album if you don't count the remix project) still gets major play...could be released tomorrow and would still stand up just fine. I am about to do the opposite and go lay down, kickin' it in the land of Zed's. Zed's dead baby, Zed's dead. On the real to real, what the deal? You know the drill - stay fly - all day, every day. *breaking news* Lady Kier will be in Seattle on August 1st at the Lake Superior Gay Pride Festival. www.ladykier.com Say WORD! Stay fly........

WHERE'S the ENEMY? WHO do I INVADE?

2007-06-09T21:26:00.001-07:00

I could go for some Eric B & Rakim right about now. Name an emcee better than Rakim. Go ahead. All you new jack swing kids spit out your Jeezy's and your Lil' Wayne's and your Jay-Z's and your Tupac's and your Biggie's and all that garbage ass. Give me some ill fucking rhymes with some substance - BOOM - Rakim. Chuck D, KRS ONE, Kool G Rap...all contenders...but I really don't think anyone is messin' with Rakim. The GOD. The 18th letter...forever. Paid In Full, Follow The Leader, Let The Rhythm Hit'em and Don't Sweat The Technique. Don't got'em? GET'EM. Shit, Paid In Full has been released and re-re-re-released about 26 times now....you should own at least 2 copies. You should be able to recite the R's verses in your sleep. You listen to hip hop and you don't follow Rakim? You can catch an F to the U. I'm not talking about the Fu-Schnickens. Know the culture, respect the architects. I've had a busy day today with the M to the A to the X. We went to Gameworks, Seattle Center for lunch, over to Pacific Science Center and then to The Childrens Museum. No joke, this daddy is worn OUT. He had a great time...even going as far to say "you're the best daddy ever!" at one point. My boy is also into Everclear's "Everything To Everyone"...funny. Good song..."Sparkle And Fade" was a great album. Not sure what happened after that. Oh well....my blog seems to be really really focusing on music recently. I rant and rave about this and that, but I can't help it. I feel very connected to this ish...I KNOW MY ISH. With the boom-boom-bap-the-boom-BAM. That's a sample in a song but I couldn't tell you from where at this particular moment in time. Corona's and Bacardi are messin' with the kid. Don't be JELLY. Pour your own...get you some!! Max and I are having a "sleepover" tonight...in the living room...his idea. Funny boy. I've decided I'm not going to see Ocean's 12...Clooney and Soderbergh have both dissed it in recent articles and interviews saying that they were just going through the motions. Bastards. I knew the bad reviews were true. Fuck, I can't seem to type properly up in this mutha. Type type tippy tippy type type. Don't be JELLY of my superior blog writing skillz. Skillz with a Z...whut?! In Canada, it's not "zee", it's "zed"...that ish is retarded. Hey homie, did you hear that new album by ZED ZED Top? It's the bomb kid!! I'm gonna go catch some ZED's yo. W...X...Y...and...ZED. Seriously fucking RE to tha DIC and if ya don't know, now ya KNOW! Alright, this is clearly getting out of control. I am going to step in now and take myself away from this silly azz computer. "Publish Post"? Ya damn right I will. For the world to see! Shout out to my man Champagne and his lovely girlfriend Eveliina (2 i's in the name, now that's gangsta!!) who will be departing for Hong Kong for a week and then off to Phuket for a week after that. I'll see you guys there in 2008. That's my word, you're gettin' served. Somebody get the Bacardi away from this bastard...for real, on the real to real, what the deal? WHUTITDOO SHORTY?! If you're gonna do anything, do it up right and make sure you come through with the flyness. Need I say more? Stay fly on the regular.....I'm out....

I KNOW PEOPLE who can REALLY HURT

2007-06-08T21:14:00.000-07:00

Would I like another glass of Absolut Mandrin and orange pineapple banana juice? Yes. Yes I would. I don't mind if I do. Now raise your glass (but watch ya self) and send a happy birthday shout out to Meilina. DO it DO it DO it...uh huh. Happy birthday to you. We had cupcakes from Cupcake Royale (royale with cheese biz-otches!) at work today. I believe they may be changing their name to orgasmic biggety bomb cakes. They do cupcakes up RIGHT. The red velvet cupcakes? FORGETABOUTIT. The chocolate one I had...FORGETABOUTIT. Why do people rave about Johnny Depp now when he was making far superior films like Donnie Brasco almost 10 years ago? Pirates sh-mi-rates, that's what I say. Ocean's 13 is out today but I'll have to wait until next week to check it out since I've got Max this weekend. That'll give me the next 7 days to rent Ocean's 12 since I never saw it. So I almost snapped at work today...when you gotta work with biz-otches who come at you sideways, there's only so much you're gonna take. I've reached my boiling point. Someone really is gonna catch that shelltoe to the side of the head...BLAM! Prince is on a Verizon commercial...a Verizon commercial. BIZARRE. Really Prince, are you that strapped for ca$h? Cash rules everything around me, cream get the money, dollar dollar bill y'all....YEAH. That piano loop on C.R.E.A.M. is sick...I hope WuTang comes back strong with their new album this summer. RZA just needs to pull out all the stops...get back to that grimey, unpolished sound. Say what you want about Kanye but I went back and revisited "The College Dropout" and that is still one of the best hip hop albums in recent years...lyrically, musically, it's fucking magic time. Jesus Walks still slams like CRRRRAZY. I predict his new album will be average at best but I've been wrong before. One things for certain, that new single is garbage stanky stank stank garbage....kinda like the fucking cloud of lotion death I had to walk through earlier today. Really? REALLY?! Did someone die and you bottled it up and sold it as ASS LOTION from the depths of hell? G'damn that DJ made my day. So a FLATLINE tattoo is in the works...I'm hoping the one known as Mr.Kaves from Lordz of Brooklyn will be able to hook it up. Go check out those limited edition Lordz t-shirts over at lordzofbrooklyn.com...they got MAJOR MAJOR fucking players to design them...Haze, Lee, Futura....NO JOKE. I'm trying to justify spending the money to get all of them. SICK. whutitdoo? whutitdoo?! So lemme finish this drink and bounce. Have yourself a merry little evening...pour yourself a drink...think to yourself, life is a-o-k....and stay fly. Period. Pointblank. And it don't dare stop. Cheers.......

LICENSED to ILL

2007-06-07T22:07:00.000-07:00

You know, sometimes you just wanna let loose, pour yourself a nice drink and watch "Glitter" starring Mariah Carey. (damn, is he STILL talking about that biz-notch?) One last time...I swear it. There, I'm done. I still can't believe Bob Barker didn't cry. (damn is he STILL talking about that old ass mutha...?) I would recommend anyone with a text package on their cell phone get unlimited texts. You're gonna go over. You got 400 texts a month, you're going over. 1000 texts a month? Guess what? You're gonna go over that too. Let me be the one to show you the ways of the force...let it guide your actions. Get unlimited texts...which are jumping up from 10 cents to 15 cents a pop soon. Ree to tha dic. (say whut?!) Don't be JELLY. Stay fly and keep-keep-keep-keep it on. La-di-da-di we likes to party, we don't cause trouble, we don't bother nobody. Is Marley Marl okay? Anyone? Anyone? We might know if Paris Hilton wasn't the second word out of everyone's mouth. I bet Bush sits up in his little white house and is like, I love me some Paris Hilton. She takes up the top stories in news, weather AND sports and shadows the fact that kids are going overseas to get shot up and shot at and blown the fuck up. Really...Bush is lovin' him some Paris Hilton, trust me. Tomorrow, it's Friday and you ain't got shit to do! MAN!! I've been up with Max since 5:45 this morning, this is not alcohol talking. Not even a drop. mmmmm DROP!!! Anyone hear how the Beastie Boys show at The Crocodile was? I bet it was crazy good. As long as it wasn't an instrumental set...that shit would put me to sleep. Stop playing instruments and pick up your freakin' microphones....or just retire altogether. You got enough money, damn. Can I get some of that for these bills, bills, bills? The Warrior Of Chaos sent me an mp3 of a track we did together a couple years back...me on the mic, produced by the man, sample of Kurt Cobain on the hook....CUT A DEAL. So I have to ask...would you eat fruit and vegetables and meat left out on a counter top, not on ice, for 6 hours? Gross. Would you eat meat on a stick at 9 in the morning? Really? REALLY?! I have to deal with ish like that...and the fact I can barely keep my eyes open. Lemme get this sucker posted and I am audi 5000. Tomorrow, 31 years ago, a baby girl was born in the Bronx. If you see her, better say happy birthday or catch a shelltoe to the back of the head. oooo, that's gonna leave a mark. Handle your business before your business handle you. Rock rock and don't stop. Above all, no matter what, no matter what the circumstances, stay fly...and do it do it dooooo it.....uh huh...........

DON'T CALL it a COMEBACK

2007-06-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

I had a vision of love....ooo darling cause you'll always be my baby....it's just a sweet sweet fantasy baby....dreamlover you've got the best of me...break break breakdown, steady breakin' me on down....cause we belong together.....Mariah, you on fire. Alright, now that I've got that wHackness out of my system we can get down to business with a quickness! Bob Barker didn't cry during the taping of his final show which airs next week. Dammit, I wanted the old man to cry. Cry dammit. Remember Dian Parkinson? My first crush I think. Don't give me no fuckin' attitude I'm just showin' you how this rapper do. Oh mommy! The legendary MARLEY MARL suffered a heart attack yesterday. Let's hope that the man who produced countless classics for the likes of LL Cool J, Masta Ace and Big Daddy Kane pulls through. Scott Storch would never have a heart attack but somehow someone like Marley Marl has to go through all that. Lady Sovereign has 2 new remixes and a live track up at iTunes...also caught the commercial for the iPhone - June 29th. SICK. Sick sick sick. The Warrior Of Chaos will possess it within the next month and then I will be one jealous bastard. Did I mention that thing is sick? SICK. Disgustingly sick. Somebody get me a bucket. I cooked up the world famous Pasta A La Baird tonight while drinking some merlot which eventually just gave me a headache. I'll stick with one glass from now on...or just with the Absolut. Anyways, the pasta consists of lots of garlic, onion, tomato, olive oil, sugar, a lil' salt n peppar....I hook it UP. I hadn't made it in awhile so it was extra extra good with that angel hair pasta. YUM. True dat...HOWUDOODAT?! I'm not sure I have much more babbling in me this evening. Last night's blog was like a 2 in 1 so I think it'll be okay if I just post this sucker up as is and come back tomorrow for more ramblings and slurrings of words. Tired. In my best David Letterman - GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!!! I'm out......stay fly...

The ANSWER is D) ALL OF THE ABOVE

2007-06-05T20:38:00.000-07:00

Warning. The following blog contains explicit thoughts and ideas. It may also talk about your mother. Readers weak of heart may want to turn back now or read one of my previous blogs where I babble about nothing. There's many to chose from, but for now, THIS. You biz-otches. You tricks. You silly ass hookers. The last time I checked we were not in the 4th grade. If you got something to say, come out and say it. I spend more time with these biz-otches than I do with Max, so either A CHANGE GONNA COME or I got to go. T and M will echo (no, not Ecko) my statements in dolby surround sound to make your eardrums pop. Really? Really?! Really. A shout goes out to Stacie who is back from NYC and continues to be one of the funniest people I've come across in recent years and is the one person on the planet who doesn't have a blog, but absolutely SHOULD. (I believe that was a run-on sentence. My apologies) One day, I hope to have a keg in my garage. For now, I just roll with the Absolut Mandarin and some oj. Delicious. Refreshing. Shake dat azz but watch ya self! So you thought I was done with my little rant about the biz-otches and the tricks? I'm not done. Did you see me do something? You did? You didn't. Don't fucking yell at me from across the office for some shit I didn't do. Really? REALLY? F dat. You're getting on my damn nerves. Nerves be snappin' like this, that and this and uhh. On Monday I was ol'grumpy bastard. I pushed people away who have always been there for me. That makes me feel bad. They know who they are. I apologize. The leveling out in my life is finally happening, although there's of course other stress that comes along with it. I just want those closest to me to know that I am not ol'grumpy bastard, that if I haven't made time like I used to, it's not a permanent thing. I had 3 random people, not close to me, call me on the dark cloud floating over my head yesterday. I had to shake-shake-shake-shake-shake it off. That was and will be the only time I reference Mariah in one of my blogs. I apologize. I should delete the evidence, but there it is. Alright, so there...there you have it. A peak inside. I feel like a new beginning is finally, finally upon me. It scares me half to death but I think that's okay and completely normal. Oh, and just to re-visit one more biz-otch, I wish I could sit at my desk all day and download iTunes music and IM people constantly. That would be so righteous. Trick. Don't push me cause I'm close to the edge. So how's everybody doing tonight? You good? You cool? Alright then. But are you fly? Gotta be fly, gotta stay fly. Gotta rock-rock and don't stop. I've only had one drink, I swear. Yes, this one is definitely all over the place. Ocean's 13 is opening on Friday. I haven't seen Ocean's 12 but don't really need to. The name Pacino is enough to get me to go see it on the big screen. Word'em up. Oh, and my final rant (I think)...if you know you've done wrong and you have to ask the person you've done wrong if you've done wrong, then you're a trick too. BOO-YA! You're lookin' at her from the rear. Only a couple hip hop quotes in this one kids...Dilated Peoples somewhere near the top and Digital Underground. This blog has become therapy for me. I love it. I was going to a therapist, which I recommend, but this has kinda taken their place and I think that's good and healthy. If I feel like I'm slipping, I can always go back. Did you hear Baird was going to see a therapist? That kid must be ffffucked up MAN! I'm not. I feel like I'm finally getting to be the person who I always knew I could be. I'm proud of myself. I'm the happiest I've been in quite some time and I can't get "Doggystyle" out of my car. BUMP BUMP BUMP. That is also the only B2K reference you'll read in my blog too so enjoy it. Remember Domino? Dude just popped into my head. The Getto Jam is about to slam....I'm so fly, you so fly, gotta get a taste of that Sweet Potatoe Pie! I can take it back to 93 anytime I want. This is my blog, you just read in it. Oh, and I just read that Bob Barker's last show on The Price Is Right will air on June 15th. I might have to take the morning off to watch it or at least get it on tape. Word'em up. WHUTITDOO?! Stay fly..........

D A R K N E S S

2007-06-03T10:26:00.000-07:00

Once again it's on.....I mean, really, how could one be expected to write blogs when it's been 80+ degrees the last couple days? As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster. What's that?...you haven't watched Goodfellas recently? You might wanna get on that. Every frame of that film is genius...every performance...every shot. Scorsese is a master. Gotta watch Casino again too. For those of you who are sitting around in 80+ degree weather like myself, may I suggest a drink to help you get through it? 7-up, Bacardi Razz, splash of grenadine and a slice of lime. The homie T-Diggy mixed that up for me a summer or two ago and I've been drinking it ever since. Also make sure to have some Coronas with lime on hand as well. You'll thank me for it later. Got together with The Warrior Of Chaos on Thursday at the mighty mighty Easy Street. Wait...I missed my man's birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY to KENNETH J BODENSTEINER. He's 30-something. We both are. Still kickin' it wicked...put you in shock...with political hip hop to make you drop. WHUTITDOO?! Take it back to 94 and 95 on dat azz...Bibulous Carnage in full effect suckaz!!! Ken gave me my shot on college radio and I ran with it back in 93. Was diggin' his mix of anything and everything metal, hip hop, punk, whatever on his show every Wednesday but Alaska, as you can imagine, was lacking in the hip hop department. So with The Warrior Of Chaos pushing me in the right direction, Sawdog hooking me up with the record label contacts, I got busy every Tuesday night from 10 to 1 in the morning, playing some real deal hip hop. One of these days I'll post some of my playlists. Shout out to the Sam man...we got together once again last night, got our drink on, our talk on...always enjoy my time with the man and always enjoy that VSOP. On this Sunday, the lord's day, may I suggest "Doggystyle" by Snoop Doggy Dogg? That shit BUMPS. Bump bump bump. You don't understand what I'm kickin' cause Snoop is on the mic and I gets wicked...FOLLOW ME. I gotta end this off now and head out for some breakfast with the ex and my beautiful boy but get out there...do the damn thing.....every day just keeps getting better and better. Girl they won't believe it. SO fly. Just wanna lay around and listen to some hip hop, some Tribe Called Quest, De La Soul ish. Throw on The Low End Theory and try and tell me it's not one of the best albums recorded by anyone ever. Buggin' out buggin' out buggin' out ya buggin' out. Check the RHIME y'all! What a great weekend. Really. I'm out for now but I'll be back...stay fly....

THE NEXT EPISODE

2007-05-30T21:46:00.001-07:00

So I've had a hell of a day...it started off nice enough, sun shining down, mid 60's on the way to work, a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Then, disaster...almost. Dodged a bullet. I've really and truly got some great people who back me up, who look out for me when times are rough. Please hold...I need a drink up in this biz-otch fa-shiz-otch. ((hold music)) Thank you for reading, we'll be with you shortly. ((more hold music)) Be sure and ask Baird what's the time, cause it's about that time. ((even more hold music)) Whut-whut-whut-whut's the time? To the...to the A.M. ((hold music ends)) Okay, thank you for holding, how may I ramble for you this evening? Last night, the Absolut was flowing like water and I was drinking it just like that. Sometimes it just has to be done. Sometimes you really just gotta stop and look around and wonder what's the point of all this? You just can't make everyone happy. Sometimes, people come into your life and you think they're cool enough but then they end up talking about themselves and rambling like a muthafucka about nothing and, it's just like, really? REALLY?! I don't have time for that nonsense. You will be shut down. Shut'em down, shut'em down, shut'em-shut'em down. In the past, I'd put on the smile and be like "oh really? wow"...now, I call you on your bullshit. I take it straight to your face, like, BLAM, what's up now?!? I'm tired of the bullshit. I like to keep a select few close to me and not let go. Like this, that and this and uh....it's like that and like this and like that and uh....it's like THIS. HOT TO DEATH. HOTTER than hot to death. In the sun today, according to the Passat at 6:30 driving away from Target - 90 muthafunkin' degrees. I'm melting. This is no joke. I ain't no joke, I used to let the mic smoke. Max grabbed one of my sharpies (I love sharpies, ask anyone) and wrote "max" on his leg...taggin' it UP! That's my boy. It's starting to cool down a bit...it was like a damn sauna in here when I got home tonight. Like, boom, bam, gawd DAMN. Sorry, this one is littered with random hip hop quotes. Are you keeping score? Six random quotes from 3rd Bass, Public Enemy, Dr.Dre, Everlast, Eric B & Rakim and Ice Cube. Watch me get down and just do my thing baby. Whoops, make that seven - Busta Rhymes - who still can't make a decent album. He releases the most insane singles but somehow, still can't put together something you can listen to from start to finish. Oh well, perhaps a reunion of Leaders Of The New School would be fresh. So really, above all, in the grand scheme of things, no matter what, stay fly and do it-do it-do it......uh huh

PUT it on ME

2007-05-29T20:04:00.001-07:00

Alright, so it's been a minute - but I keep this ish coming. (shout out to the Warrior Of Chaos and Baby G!) Remember when LL tried going extra hardcore on "14 Shots To The Dome"...? That didn't quite work out...but it did contain one of the best song titles ever: "Pink Cookies In A Plastic Bag Getting Crushed By Buildings". What the fuck L? So it is HOT TO DEATH right about now and only getting hotter tomorrow - mid 80's. MADNESS. I'll be melting up in this joint. I had Max the past 4 days, MC Ron (my dad) came into town, braved the retardness of IKEA during their no tax sale, got Max a real deal bed, complete with a tent over the mutha. Love it. Watched a classic 2 nights ago - Caddyshack - still funny after all these years. Rodney, Chevy and Bill Murray really DO THE DAMN THING in that one. Listening to KRS ONE at the moment....KRS ONE! ROCK ONNNNNNN!! SOUTH BRONX! SOUTH-SOUTH BRONX! Rappaz R N Dainja! That's the SOUND OF THE POLICE! Yes yes y'all. KRS ONE and the legendary MARLEY MARL just released an album together - should make a little history me thinks. Gotta snatch that one up on Thursday when I meet up with Mr.Chaos for coffee at the world famous Easy Street Records. If you come to Seattle, you gotta go - I find gem after gem after gem there. Sure, you can download music all you want from Russia, but when you go into a store and dig-dig-dig to find that one album or single missing from your collection....man, that's a beautiful thing right there. I'm back on the Absolut Vanilla...also Corona's with lime cause that ish is tasty right there. Met up with Sam man and his boys, Andrew and Sophomore for breakfast yesterday morning. Gotta say, I missed my nephews. No matter the situation, nothing can change the fact that I'm proud of them. One of them about about to graduate from high school and head off to college, the other is growing up faster than I can keep up, planning on becoming a top chef - truly doing it. Amazing. I'm a proud uncle. ROYALTY. Nothing less than the best. Stay fly. The sun is setting now...been blasting on my back as I've been typing this up. HAWT. Would really like to get a MacBook so I can be portable with this...would like to do a lot of things. Good things come to those who wait. Everything happens for a reason. Can't have what you want now, chill and get it later. Come on and get rhythm, when you get the blues. JOHNNY CASH up in this mutha. Gonna do it, do it, do it. Bartender, another drink please. Thank you kindly. Babble young man babble. I hope you're all having wonderful mornings and afternoons and evenings. Throw on some De La Soul and stay fly. So fly...all day, every day.

I'm RELOADED! OKAY?!!!?

2007-05-25T23:15:00.000-07:00

[VERSE]
Nothing in this world got me like you do baby
I'd give up my soul
If I couldn't sing with you daily
I'm not the only girl
In love with you it's crazy
I appreciate your groove
Now I know I owe everything to you

[CHORUS]
Music
I'm so in love with my music
The way you keep me
Movin
Ain't nobody doing what you're doing
Doing, doing
So bring me back to the day
When tape decks press play
DJ drop the needle til the
Record just break
You are my sunlight
You are the one mic
That sound so sweet because the beat just inspires me
Ooh

[VERSE]
No limit to your mind
Your endless love is open
To every race and kind
Could it be your blood runs golden
Baby if this world were mine
We would be singing in the Key of Life
When you're gone I can't survive
Cause I just can't be without my

[CHORUS]
Music
I'm so in love with my music
The way you keep me
Movin
Ain't nobody doing what you're doing
Doing, doing
So bring me back to the day
When tape decks press play
DJ drop the needle til the
Record just break
You are my sunlight
You are the one mic
That sound so sweet because the beat just inspires me
Ooh

[Lauryn]
Colours of sound
Scales and beauty
Audio scenery
Electric love and
Rhythmic symmetry
Written in memory
Beautifully crafted scenery
Complex or simplicity
Sonic energy
Piercing insensitivity
Sympathetic poetry
For some even identity
Collective entity
Something to belong to
A source of energy
The possibilities
Wave lengths and bandwith
Higher vibration
Energizing entire lands with
Or stand for
Lovers to walk hand in hand with
then plan for
Sanctuary chords
Harmony, melodies, even riffs can be
Disguised human essence
Sonically bottled ecstasy
Or melancholy
Agony blues angst
Exercising anxieties
Fueling entire societies
Making economies
Stimulating generating
Inspiration synonymously
Entertaining expression
Intangible invisible but undeniable
Plays the language of excitement on survival
Some call it tribal
But perspective is everything
Connected to everything
Some say collectively everything

[CHORUS]
Music
I'm so in love with my music
The way you keep me
Movin
Ain't nobody doing what you're doing
Doing, doing
So bring me back to the day
When tape decks press play
DJ drop the needle til the
Record just break
You are my sunlight
You are the one mic
That sound so sweet because the beat just inspires me
Ooh

NY to SEATOWN we get DOWN

2007-05-20T22:48:00.000-07:00

First off - Happy birthday Stacie. I had this wonderful vodka and honey martini earlier today after getting my hair cut so cheers to you. Cheers to you too. I could really go for some spring rolls right about now. So last night, after a slight 24 hour delay, I met up with the Sam man over in Kirkland for dinner and drinks and plenty of conversation. The vsop was flowing all night and I had a great time. Put a call into Serafin and he met up with us for more drinks. If we had cigars we would have smoked them. Somehow someway, we keep comin' up with funky fly shit like every single day. JUICY. When the words come to me, I type as fast as I can...can you keep up? Follow me - life is too short to be unhappy. Get rid of the negative and get positive, stay positive, get focused, stay focused. If anyone needs me, I'll be in Phuket next summer...or maybe a return visit to Helsinki. One way or another I'm going somewhere. Don't let obstacles get in your way of obtaining true happiness. Do whatever it takes to get to a spot in life where you feel balanced. Balance is huge. Day in, day out, you get into these damn routines - mix it up and cross the fader as I get down like an elevator. Speaking of which, Lisa Gale (from high school) and her husband Cole paid a surprise visit to Seattle yesterday. We ended up at the EMP which I hadn't really explored before. The hip hop section was AMAZING. Afrika Bambaataa, Kool Herc, Grandmaster Flash, Kurtis Blow and a host of graffiti writers were all represented. Tons of old school pics from the Bronx when things were jumping off in the early 80's. Mindblowing. I feel like I'm typing in slow motion - uhhh, I like it like that. David Gray anyone? So tired. Been up until all hours of the morning recently. Can't help it...sometimes the system just doesn't wanna shut down...but it will now. Or maybe in 5 minutes from now. Starbucks, as much as I try not to support their bazillion dollar company, has this freaking amazing orange mocha at the moment. Insanely good. I gotta get one tomorrow morning. Coffee is the worst damn addiction. $3+ a pop every day....cha-ching. Can someone pass me a winning lotto ticket? Peace and I'm out. G'd up from the feet up. Today was tough, tomorrow will be better and the day after that, even better than the days before that. Stay focused and stay positive. Party people in the place, from Seatown to the BX to Helsinki town.....stay FLY.

AIN'T NUTHIN' but a "G" THANG

2007-05-19T10:51:00.000-07:00

Unfadeable so please don't try and fade this. Last night - I was FADED, tired out of my skull. I had one drink and felt like I could pass out at 8:45. Ridiculous. I managed to keep myself awake until 10-ish but was unable to focus long enough to get the blog together. I crashed out until 2 in the morning when I was awakened by the sounds of chirping stupid ass fucking BIRDS outside my window. I also thought I heard my phone ring but was clearly in an Ambien-enhanced state of mind. I think I might live with a ghost. My light out in my living room turned itself on...TWICE, the other night. Freaked me out a bit. I don't think I live with a ghost - I think I have a light with a short in it or something. I have seen a ghost. My friend was killed in a horrible car accident...he came to me, in my doorway and said "sucks doesn't it?" before I even knew he was dead. Freaky. Oh, and be careful with those water bottles with the twisty caps...water can shoot out of them like a geyser. (I have no idea how to spell that...I believe it's the first time I've ever used the word in a sentence before) Today, I will get my hair cut and then, hopefully, meet up with Sam man later tonight for a drink-e-drink. Ever be sitting with someone and they're telling you a story and you get chills cause you feel like you've heard it before? Yeah, it's called deja vu. I know that, but I swear I get it A LOT. I always have. Freaky deaky freaky deaky. The people who live next door to me are moving out today...and are being insanely loud about it. Knock it off. Gotta get outta here soon. To the north, south, east and west - stay fly. Eat some vegetable chips - they're delicious. Front to back, right to left, keep it on all night, make it HOT TO DEATH......

ONE STEP AHEAD of the SPIDER

2007-05-17T19:58:00.000-07:00

One blog missing. No post last night. What happened? Are you alright? Did you bump your head and forget your password? Did you completely forget about all of us? I'm BACK. I'm sippin' on Absolut Ruby Red and 7Up...tasty. Refreshing. Cool and crisp for all the people up top, check this out. FLY. Beyond fly. Stay fly. Keep that movin' and rock rock and don't stop. I have a myspace page now. It's ridiculous. The homie out in Helsinki hooked me up without me asking - Champagne does the damn thing. It cracked me up. This is still my SPOT but big up's to him for taking the time. I will say it over and over again, the myspace page layout is wiggety-wiggety-wiggety wack. Doesn't seem logical to me. The only thing I really like about myspace is that you open it up and BLAM - music playing. Champagne knows me well so he threw on Bush Killa by Paris. www.guerrillafunk.com Check that with a quickness. You'll find an article or two I did on Paris and Guerrilla Funk in the press section. Paris is a cool guy, making the kind of music that, since 1990, smacks you upside the head with the truth. Get with the program. I got my Carlito's Way t-shirt today. Dope. SO FLY. I can't feel my face. Kidding. I joke I joke. All the time. Jokes. Did you see my painting? I got it at Target. Christopher Walkin on SNL is classic. I gotta have more cowbell! I got so many peeps that surround me, going through the kind stuff I've been going through the last 5 months. I wanna be there for all of them. I'm coming out of it now, stronger than ever, ready to bust back - got my strap and I'm ready to cap. On the real - there for all of them. Whatever they need, I'm here. I've been through the battle and come out with scars but I'm okay. This crazy ass shit is beyond your control sometimes. IT IZ WHUT IT IZ. Sometimes people just grow apart...sometimes you think you know someone and you really don't. Sometimes people just aren't meant to be together forever....and somehow, even though that's extremely difficult, that's okay. You gotta stand up for your happiness. You've gotta know that, while today might be tough, tomorrow is going to be better. Time heals that ish. Oh, and for real, fuck y'all who come through with your bullshit "well I think" and this and that - lemme put you in check right quick - fuck you, I didn't ask what you think. All I need is support. Get a grip. Don't push me cause I'm close to the edge...I'm tryin' not to lose my head. 8:11 on a Thursday night. I'm gonna get together with Sam man tomorrow - he's going through some ish right now, and I'll be damned if I'm not gonna be there for him. He was there for me, back in December/January and he's always had my back...I've always looked up to him. That's a great man right there. If you've met him, you know it. If you haven't, allow me to introduce you. One of my peeps I hold close to my heart. There's a handful. True colors have been shining through over the past couple months. I know who's got my back and who doesn't. I see y'all. Keep your friends close but your enemies closer. Some say I got a way with words...piece'em all together one by one and look what I came up with. STAY FLY. On the real to real, stay fly. I got your back....

THIRTY THOUSAND FEET

2007-05-15T23:25:00.000-07:00

Rock rock and don't stop...keep keep keep it on. With 35 minutes to spare I'm actually getting on here before the clock strikes midnight and my Ambien kicks in with a quickness. This post has been brought to you by the makers of Absolut Ruby Red. Where have you been all my life? It's good. Maybe not as good as the Vanilla which I grew accustomed to (and who you can thank for half these blogs) but still pretty damn good. Tasty. I was driving home tonight and looked over to my left - Starbuck's headquarters. It's freaking huge and they plan on expanding it. Nuts. I'd like to give a shout out to Java Love up on Beacon Hill. I've been going there for YEARS, before Max was born, and it's still the best coffee in Seattle and Oscar, the owner, is still the nicest. Love to support the little guy if at all possible. Max and I went in there on Saturday morning and ain't a damn thing changed. Check it out for yourself if you don't believe me. Damn...tired. I wish I had a condo or a house that overlooked the Seattle skyline...somewhere maybe in West Seattle, looking out over everything. So fly. I heard it went past the 77 degrees they were predicting for today. All I know is that it was HOT TO DEATH. Straight up and down. Ambien is messin' with me...gotta close up shop now before I start reciting WuTang Clan lyrics and not remember a damn thing about it in the morning. What a night. So fly. Keep keep keepin' on........(oh, and note to Jessica Alba - stop posing for GQ and all these other magazines with little clothing if you want to be "taken seriously as an actress"...it's annoying already. Knock it off).....okay, really signing off this time.....what a random rant....g'ed up from the feet up...how we do...what it do?......ramble young man ramble.........FLY....

$100 worth of CUCUMBERS & BANANAS

2007-05-14T22:13:00.002-07:00

Monday evening, the blog is on...let me clear my throat now! Puerto Rico! Black people! White people! Old people! As soon as I get done writing this, I need to check into tickets for Walking With Dinosaurs and for A Day Out With Thomas. Max will flip if we can go to one/both of those. The Pacific Science Center has a new dinosaur exhibit opening up, plus a new dinosaur IMAX film at the end of the month. Dopeness for my little boy. My headlight has been out on the Passat for quite some time now...$40 to have a new one put in at a place right around the corner from my work. I can deal. 70+ degrees today as expected and hotter tomorrow...HOT TO DEATH. I polished off my Absolut Vanilla tonight....that...well, that didn't take very long. Feel like I just got that bottle last week...think it was more like 2+ weeks ago. Must get more. Delicious. What else is going on? OH...I meant to post about this yesterday. Max and I went grocery shopping on Saturday and we're about to drive away. I'm approaching the stop sign and a woman, walking out of the store drops at least $20 on the ground, kicks it and keeps on walking, not realizing what she has done. I see it all happen and watch as a couple walking behind her pick it up and pocket it. They didn't see her drop it. What do you do? I looked back and she was gone and that bastard had her money...that would have bought me a couple cd's (or some more Absolut!) if I was the one walking behind her! I wouldn't have pocketed it. I would have given it back to her, cause I'm nice like that. Stay fly on the regular, all day, every day. I was just thinking - this is kinda like my diary I kept when I was 7. Today we went to the store and it rained. Today I played outside with my sister. Today my dad took me to get ice cream. I am hoping to hell this is better reading than all that. How much longer can I really keep this up? Day in, day out, blog in, blog out...babble babble babble. I think I will sign off here. Tune in tomorrow true believers. So fly.......(speaking of which, the t-shirt I found and ordered after I posted last night is below).....soooo damn fly......

THWIP!

2007-05-13T19:33:00.000-07:00

Spiderman...Spiderman....does whatever a spider can....except make a good third movie. If you haven't seen Spiderman 3 and want to, you may wanna skip over this next part. So I went to see Spiderman 3 finally...alone. It was the first movie I had ever been to alone and it was an odd experience. Not so much going IN to the movie but coming OUT of the movie...who do I talk to about it afterwards? Myself? I guess so. Before I get into Spidey, my prediction is that the new Adam Sandler movie will bomb horribly although, like all his movies of the last 10 years, it will make a ton of money. The best preview of the bunch was for Balls Of Fury. Check the screen shots of Christopher Walken - http://imdb.com/title/tt0424823/ - awesome. Spiderman 3 was good, but not great, and extremely uneven and all over the place....kinda like trying to read this blog of mine without drinking heavily. It lacked the HEART of the first two and the pacing was really off. Sandman turned into this giant...um...sand man and it was wwwway over the top. Venom was pretty cool although if you blink you'll miss him. Too many characters, too all over the place, too much crying! Moving right along...(stay fly)...it's supposed to be 70+ degrees again here in the mighty Seatown tomorrow and Tuesday. I need to take a day (or two) off. Days just for me to do whatever, to just chill, go to the beach, go to the park, zone out with the iPod on random, journey with that ish for a bit. I really do wanna go on a trip though...would be cool to meet up with the homie Champagne in NYC or go visit him again in Helsinki for a fourth time. Wanna eventually meet up with him and Eveliina in Phuket...take a good chunk of time off (and a good chunk out of my bank account) and just go CHILL. The time away would be nice but I know I'd just end up missing Max by day 4 or 5. That little boy is my world. Nothing else really matters...almost nothing. Make it live all night, make it HOT TO DEATH. Can I get anyone else a drink? I downloaded the new Eve single yesterday, produced by Swizz Beats - pretty damn good although I heard her album is not coming out on Aftermath. Hopefully Dre will still be producing some of the cuts on the album and it won't go the way of The Game...or King Tee...or Rakim. What the hell does Dre do all day anyway?? He doesn't produce for THAT many people. Now let me blow ya mind. Is it Monday yet? Oh, and one last thing, coming full circle here - you stupid ass parents who take your 2,3,4,5,6 year olds to Spiderman 3 need to have your heads examined. The movie is crazy violent, earning that PG13 rating. And one last thing, the next person in a movie theater to bring in a bag of RUSTLE CRINKLE CRACKLE NOISE NOISE CAN'T HEAR THE FUCKING DIALOGUE because of your bag of WHATEVER THE HELL THAT IS is gonna get a shelltoe to the back of the head. That's my word. In closing, please continue to remain fly as hell. I have spoken...don't front, ya know I gotcha open.....

HERE COME da PAIN

2007-05-12T23:15:00.000-07:00

....and like Carlito Brigante, I'm "reinvigorated and reassimilated" with complex comprehension in my dimension, witness the ascension, runnin' off the mouth with muthafuckin' hypertension. Those lyrics were written by some cat named Flatline about 7-8 years ago now, but they're still FLY as hell right? So fly. So fly. I wasn't planning on writing anything tonight. It's a Saturday night and I should be at the club, gettin' my drink on and my smoke on. Heh. Homie really doesn't do that. But I do feel like writing a symphony...or something. Fact of the matter is, I feel more ALIVE now than I have in recent months. Where I once felt dead, there is a second wind in me - a belief that some good is really REALLY going to come out of all this. I deserve that. My time to be selfish now. I motherfucking deserve that. I feel inspired, I feel empowered, I feel like 07 is actually gonna be one of the best years of my life. Moving forward, gimme that Krylon can and let me REALLY paint the town. BOOGIE DOWN. Carlito's Way, just for the record, is one of the best films ever and absolutely one of Pacino's best, topping the ever-popular Scarface. Scarface was great to me as a teenager but has lost something as I've gotten "older". Carlito's Way on the other hand, is a class act...classy like The Godfather...classy like Heat. Movies I can watch over and over and over again. So I guess this has become a daily thing...70+ peeps have read the ramblings. When I hit 100, I'll let you know. My love...hey...my love...hey...my love...hey..my love...hey. The genuine article is the most attractive thing ever. You'll know it when you see it. You just KNOW. You can feel it. No diggety, no doubt. Tired....it's approaching the 11:30 hour and with me being up past my bedtime the past 2 nights I gotta catch those zzz's. Oh, and Ambien free for the past two nights. I'd recommend the sleeping aid powers of Jack Daniels to anybody. Can't sleep? Drink Jack. Not feeling well? Drink Jack. A shot or two never hurt nobody. Enough of this rambling...typing in the damn dark. Go watch/rent/buy Carlito's Way. I thank you in advance for your continued cooperation. Stay fly...

DOLLAR DOLLAR BILL Y'ALL

2007-05-11T21:49:00.000-07:00

UGH. Sooooo....I was sitting here, happily typing away....and freakin' Safari quit on me and I lost everything that I was about to post. Muthafucka. That annoys me to no end...not like sitting in a car going on a 10 hour road trip annoying, but pretty damn annoying. I think I've been on a...15 hour road trip? Seattle to Calgary in a day with my sister. Must have been 14-15 hours...it was hellish. That's just a long freaking drive, period. And while you're driving for that amount of time, don't think about the planes overhead, which could get you to your destination in under 2 hours...and you can drink while flying...unless you're the pilot, then I really would not recommend that and I thank you in advance. UGH. So, back to it. Can't even remember what I was babbling about....something about priorities. Oh yeah - GET them STRAIGHT. Line'em up and knock'em down...do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. You're not happy now? You're in control of that to some small/large degree. Of course it always depends on the situation but, like I really REALLY like to say: It is what it is. Deal with it. Guard your grill, knuckle up. (another Naughty By Nature reference, amazing) Why didn't Treach ever break out and go solo?? Vinnie can't rhyme...Treach ran the show, rhyming circles around dude. Weird. Hip hop hooray bizotches. Jack is my friend tonight, just one shot and I'm good. Max is running a bit of a fever so I gave him some purple medicine, hopefully I've caught it in time. Tired. Was up until a little after midnight last night...just UP. Sometimes my brain refuses to shut off. It's really annoying but, everyone together now: it is what it is. Back to happiness, it comes in waves for me now which I like. Things are changing but changing for the better. I am able to now become whatever I want to become, to be the best person I can be, to learn things, challenge myself, color outside the box a bit, be more open...breathe in the sun. (Perceptionists reference) OH...and you know what book I love (which of course they're going to make into a movie) is "Horton Hears A Who!" by Dr.Seuss. Max got it from the library and I've read it to him twice now. Takes me back to when I was 5 years old. Also shines the light on the fact that Dr.Seuss was smokin' some of that real stickie-icky-icky...oooo weeee! Great book though, for real. Whether you have kids or you don't - go to a book store, pick it up and read it - brilliant stuff. Bartender this glass is empty. I'm gonna post this sucker now before the stupid browser decides to crash again. Signing off, truly yours, thanks for being so fly...so fly...so fly......

Piz-uck Fa-shiz Uck (HA!!)

2007-05-10T20:40:00.000-07:00

I wonder what Wolfgang Puck is doing right now? Probably counting all his money from all those frozen pizzas he's been selling!! Do you ever struggle to find the words? Do you ever step on peoples toes by accident? Do you ever read these posts and think to yourself Baird is nuts? I'm not nuts. It's the alcohol. 4 out of 5 posts are alcohol fueled. This one is being written with a (semi) clear mind. I kinda lay it all out there don't I? I write these thoughts of mine many times not realizing, hey, everyone and their mother can read it. It's cool. This is me. It is what it is. Deal with it. If your soul loves the sun, money rock on...1,2 and ya don't stop. (Funkdoobiest reference, sorry) Funkdoobiest performed at my first (and only) emcee competition. Did I stick around to watch them perform? No. Did I realize who they were, that DJ Muggs was the production mastermind behind them? No. Did I have any idea that their debut album "What Doobie U B?" would become one of my all time favorite hip hop records? Nope. The year was 1992 and I decided to enter the emcee competition, me and my man MoPlay who would later be entertained with signing to Nervous Records (then home to Black Moon and Smif N Wessun, major players). He became a mormon, went on his mission and left hip hop behind. While some people may have memories of when they were doin' it out in the park, in the Bronx, breakin' on cardboard, or a RUN DMC concert in Queens where they kicked down the g'damn door....I have a memory of MoPlay, getting on stage and freestyling his whole set - at one point, getting a teddy bear thrown up on stage at him and he started rhyming about the teddy bear. DOPE. Dude, could go off about anything and everything. We'd rock instrumentals in my car and he'd just flow non-stop. Me, I'm more of a writer. Perfecting my lyrics with the pen and the pad, then reciting until they ring in my ears. I've missed that boat, but the homie Josh is about to take the world by storm, possibly producing for some major players, and even if he only produces for the minors and the independent artists, dudes beats are sick. Wow...that Absolut and orange pineapple banana is kickin' in lovely. Feel me...flow. (Naughty By Nature reference) Oh, and back to the emcee competition, I didn't win...not sure I was even on the radar, but it was an amazing thing to get up on that stage and have people FEELING what I was rhyming about. I was heavily influenced, lyrically, by people like KRS ONE, Chuck D, Paris and Rakim, so it was no surprise my lyrics were political in nature. It is what it is. Whutitdoo whutitdoo? Funny, I sat down here, not thinking I'd write much when clearly, that's the opposite. If you must drink, I suggest drinking on the weekend - especially if you're going on a 10 hour road trip. Just sayin'. Bartender, another drink if you please. This kid is on a roll. Dumped ice on the ground making another drink but that's alright with me. My floors, I clean'em. WHUT. I was listening to Ice Cube's "Death Certificate" album today...took it back to 91....OH, and was having pizza for lunch and heard the SAMPLE he used on The Funeral (intro)...what are the chances of that? Anyone craving Indian food? Me too. Hit me off with a veggie samosa, some spinach garlic naan and some aloo gobi and I AM GOOD. Back to "Death Certificate" for a minute - that's a classic album right there, minus "Horny Little Devil" and "Black Korea". The homie Champagne and myself are still saying "peace 5000 g" to this very day because of that damn album. What happened to Cube? Dude was the sharpest on any coast, found some success with Friday and then had to make stupid ass sequels and movies like Anaconda (I don't care if J.Lo is in it!) and Are We There Yet...and then, when he releases his latest album last year it just rings false. Wick-wick-wack. I would recommend, if you don't have some Absolut and Dole orange pineapple banana juice, you might wanna get some....I'm just sayin'. God damn this is getting ridiculously long. Is anyone still reading? For real? Thank you for being so damn fly. Cheers to you and yours and keep this gangsta party movin' for the 07 shot. I'm gone......(look at Cube in that pic, you know that's a plastic gun...keepin' it real son!) Another time, the story of me opening up for Cypress Hill.....INSANE IN THE BRAIN!

WHUT IZ HE GOING TO SAY NOW?

2007-05-09T21:34:00.000-07:00

7 days - 7+ posts. This whole blog idea was supposed to be an online collection of all my creations - now it's become random ramblings - but I dig it. So fly. It was another beautiful day in Seattle - the kind of day where you wanna leave work and not come back. I went looking for mother's day cards this afternoon but came back empty handed. I'll have to take Max with me (damn, we should have done that tonight) to look for some. Playstation 3 is sick - and I'm not even into video games. Max plays this one game (in the stores) and the graphics are OFF THE HEEZY FA SHEEZY! (please stop...stop it...stop it right now) 70 degrees again today...would have been nice to hang out at Alki or go to the park or...SLEEP. A nice NAP, laying out in the sun...zzzz. So I was thinking about all the live shows I've been to and decided to come up with a list of all them, kinda in order. Ready? Set? Here they are: Tone-Loc & The 2 Live Crew, Ice-T & The Syndicate, Public Enemy/Anthrax/Primus/Young Black Teenagers, Ice-T & Body Count, Beastie Boys/Sonic Youth/L7, House Of Pain & Rage Against The Machine, Red Hot Chili Peppers/Ministry/Ice Cube/Pearl Jam/Soundgarden/Lush, Consolidated, Meat Beat Manifesto, Snoop Doggy Dogg & Tha Dogg Pound, Cypress Hill, Gene, Spearhead, Del Tha Funkee Homosapien & Souls Of Mischief, James Brown/Maceo Parker/The JB's, Public Enemy, D'Angelo, Eminem & The Beatnuts, Remy Shand, En Vogue, DJ Shadow, Public Enemy & X-Clan, Morrissey. Sooooo...what was my point in listing all these again? I have no idea. My memory does suck from time to time so I suppose it's good I have a written record. Damn I could go for some chocolate cake...and ice cream right about now. Warm it up (kris, I'm about to!) and just eat-eat-eat...delicious. At this point in the evening I clearly have nothing more to say...(babble young man babble).....stay fly.....on the real......HOT TO DEATH.....death by chocolate...

DRINK CITY

2007-05-08T22:40:00.000-07:00

So I talked and talked about homie's organic pizza but I've gotta say - that was one damn good pizza. After consuming the pizza I sat down and watched Sin City for a 4th or 5th time...what a piece of work that movie is. Revolutionary in vision and style - just like the damn comic/graphic novel. Clive Owen is a favorite in that, as is Mickey Rourke....and Jessica Alba. Where is Benicio Del Toro? I haven't seen him in anything in ages. Great actor but missed. I was watching "The Daily 10" on E! before I threw on Sin City and apparently, if Robert Rodriguez signs on, Sin City 2 will start filming this summer. Dope. I'm not sure this will be much of a post and it's hard to top the ramblings of the last one. Still haven't seen SpiderMan 3...wah. It probably made another ba-zillion dollars today. Somebody's getting rich and it's not me. Just as a disclaimer - I write these non-stop...literally, non-stop...whatever pops into my head is what ends up on the page. Welcome to my little world. Would you care for a vodka and orange pineapple banana juice? Delicious. I forgot to watch Heroes last night, was too busy creating something, too busy with other stuff on my mind. Whatitdoo...whatitdoo? Damn, I really gotta sign off here as it approaches the 11 o'clock hour. Gotta be up early...jump into the shiny clean Passat and head into work. Maybe I'll try getting up early and....maybe not. Damn me and my 6:08am internal alarm clock. Annoying already, knock it off. This post has been brought to you by the makers of Ambien.....no it has not. Got any apple juice? I'm out...

BEATS to my RHYME just KICKIN'...

2007-05-08T19:00:00.000-07:00

...I do not like to eat chicken. But the smell of fried chicken - gimme some of THAT. So I'm lit up like an xmas tree. I'd like to thank the makers of Absolut Vanilla and the very tasty Dole orange pineapple banana juice. You mix that up and I swear it's the best drink EVER. I am currently baking. Baking a Wolfgang Puck ALL NATURAL four cheese, tomato and pesto pizza. How all natural is it? I just don't give a fuckkkkkkkkk. "I'm nicer than Pete, but I'm on a Serch to crush a Miilkbone, I'm Everlastin', I melt Vanilla Ice like silicone"........remember when Eminem was the baddest rapper on the planet? No? Go back and listen to his first 2 albums...no one has EVER flipped it like THAT. Skip past the "faggot' tracks and that "Kim" track but everything else is pretty much all good. Homophobia, not all good. Using the "f" word with that much HATE behind it will get you ejected...and knocked da fuck out man!!! 12 minutes and I've got a pizza. How all natural is it really? It's a FROZEN PIZZA. I'm not looking at the ingredients (damn, that took a minute to spell correctly) and I'm really not concerned with it. Moving on....my son just made his very first sandwich - two pieces of bread with jam in the middle. Awesome. I miss him, he's with his mom tonight. I picked him up from school early cause he was coughing and not breathing quite right. He has borderline asthma and his allergies have been out of control since he was born. I gave him a breathing treatment and he's fine now. Such an amazing little boy. He keeps me going from day to day. Random phone calls from random people keep me going from day to day. I kinda feel like life is just beginning for me. It is what it was and now it is what it is. My quote, my bond, my word - IT IS WHAT IT IS. Deal with it muthafuckaz. I'm playin'. Lit up like a xmas tree....and 5 minutes left on that organic pizza. Song of the moment - Wild Horses - Alicia Keys and Adam Levine unplugged and doin' it. Damn, the sun is shining through my damn window....tryin' to blind your man....can't see...can't type....lit up like a xmas tree. This ish is messed UP. More to come....stay tuned true believers....and if you got liquor in the cabinet - pour some - DAMN. All over the place. Word to Wolfgang Puck. Word to the peeps that keep me smiling day to day - you know who you are. Yeah...YOU. In the words of Wolfgang Puck...or in this case his pizza box "Live, Love, Eat". TRUE DAT. MOS DEF. Okay, I'm back....the buzzer went off....and you know that shit is gonna burn the roof of my mouth if I attempt to eat it in the current state I'm in. Goddamn. Goddamn that DJ made my day...TERMINATOR X!! Let that pizza cool....but I gotta read the back of the box here...."I like to finish the pizza with freshly grated parmesan cheese, a few fresh basil leaves or a sprinkle of oregano".....oh yeah? You do? Muthafucka, I wouldn't be eating your frozen pizza if I had all that! But here's my 5 dollars, you're rich beeeotch!! Wasn't I gonna post this a minute ago?....type type type.......to be continued.............

REBEL YELL

2007-05-07T22:32:00.000-07:00

It is hot in the city...hot in the city tonight...tonight....alright. 70+ degrees in this joint...and I'm struggling to find the words. It was a beautiful day in Seattle, sun shining...god damn birds chirping outside my window. (ugh) I woke up with a headache this morning (too much gin & juice?...so tasty) but some (legal) drugs, a couple glasses of water and a mocha later, I was feeling back to normal. Dehydration is never a good thing which is clearly what I was suffering from - that, less than 7 hours of sleep and the ringing of Morrissey in my damn ears. WuTang are coming to Bumbershoot this year...funny, I would listen to the Wu and Morrissey side by side back in 93/94. Speaking of which, would it kill someone to remaster all the early Wu joints and re-release them?? Especially the first Meth album - it sounds like muffled garbage and is still one of my favorites. Come on RZA!! So I'm thinking checking out the Wu live would be a good thing. Oh, and I don't wanna jinx anything but you may hear a friend of mine producing for some Wu projects in the near future. No joke...could be major. I'm real real excited about that. I listened to Johnny Cash all damn today...21 tracks over and over and over again. *yawn* I'll post my interview with M-Eighty that just went up at Rapstation today (thanks Z!) soon...but for now, must sleep, must rest and then come back tomorrow with some new ish. HOT TO DEATH........

M O Z

2007-05-06T23:17:00.000-07:00

After listening to the man for the past 16+ years, I have finally SEEN him with my own two eyes. Morrissey.

"You know, sometimes I look out into the crowd and I hear someone yell out "Johnny Marr" and then I look, and it IS Johnny Marr"

Hilarious. I don't know who the opening act was...I was in The Paramount Club with my man T-Diggy, sippin' on gin and grapefruit juice. Shout out to the cheese and the bread paper cracker stuff - delicious. Also to Erik (aka: E-Dub) and Amy, who we met up in there, predicting which Smiths songs he might perform. We were in PRIME seating, right below the main balcony, first row - amazing. (thank you Tracy!!!) Erik said Morrissey had been opening up the show with The Queen Is Dead and they launched right into it...then into 3 or 4 Moz songs that I did not recognize. The last Morrissey album I bought was "Maladjusted"...and yikes....that was in 1997. I feel old. They performed NOTHING from "Vauxhaul and I" which was a little disappointing as it's one of my favorite albums. They played "The Boy With The Thorn In His Side" for about a minute - until he stopped them from playing it because he couldn't hear himself singing - they did not revisit it. "Everyday Is Like Sunday" was a major highlight as well as "Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want". They closed off the show with "You're Gonna Need Someone On Your Side" from "Your Arsenal" which was insanely good. Oh, and they also played "How Soon Is Now" which was incredible. It was an hour and a half ROCK show....but now here's where I've gotta complain, and I think it really falls on the Seattle crowds...they're lame. A handful of people threw flowers....3 people got on stage....there just didn't seem to be a connection between Morrissey and the audience, or for that matter, Morrissey and his band. It was very bizarre at times to me, like he was just going through the motions. Could be just me but don't get me wrong - I am really glad I had a chance to see him...the whole night was first class thru and thru. (where was Brother Rick?)

As I look over at the clock and realize it's 11:35, I am really wishing I did not have to go to work tomorrow. Would much rather chill and watch Walk The Line again or something. With Camp Lo (straight outta the Bronx) playing in the background (talk about a 180 from Morrissey) I am outta here....please please please let me get what I want........

Good times for a change
See, the luck I've had
Can make a good man
Turn bad

So please please please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want
This time

Haven't had a dream in a long time
See, the life I've had
Can make a good man bad

So for once in my life
Let me get what I want
Lord knows, it would be the first time
Lord knows, it would be the first time

53 MINUTES..........

2007-05-06T18:58:00.000-07:00

Here is London, giddy of London
Is it home of the free -
Or what ?

Can you squeeze me
Into an empty page of your diary
And psychologically save me
I've got faith in you
I sense the power
Within the fingers
Within an hour the power
Could totally destroy me
(Or, it could save my life)

Oh, here is London
"Home of the brash, outrageous and free"
You are repressed
But you're remarkably dressed
Is it Real ?
And you're always busy

Really busy
Busy, busy
Oh, hairdresser on fire
All around Sloane Square
And you're just so busy
Busy, busy
Busy scissors
Oh, hairdresser on fire
(Only the other day)

Was a client, over-cautious
He made you nervous
And when he said
"I'm gonna sue you"
Oh, I really felt for you ...mmm...

So can you squeeze me
Into an empty page of your diary;
And supernaturally change me ?
Change me, change
Oh, here in London
"Home of the brash, outrageous and free"
You are repressed
But you're remarkably dressed
Is it Real ?
And you're always busy

Really busy
Busy clippers
Oh, hairdresser on fire
All around Sloane Square

And you're just too busy
To see me
Busy clippers
Oh, hairdresser on fire
(Only the other day)

I WALK the LINE

2007-05-05T23:12:00.000-07:00

48 minutes until midnight...no time like the present to type up random randomness with a quickness. In the last 24 hours I have watched Walk The Line FINALLY. (thanks to T-Diggy...had his copy on dvd for about 6 months now) GOOD LOOKIN' OUT! What a great film...I was really blown away by the performances of everyone involved...even dude from T2 and The X-Files was in it as the man in black's dad. The Warrior Of Chaos burned me a disc of some Johnny Cash material about 2-3 years ago but I was inspired to go looking for a 'best of'...and find one I did. THE LEGEND OF JOHNNY CASH - put out by Rick Rubin's American label in 2005. Always knew it existed - never picked it up - so glad I did. 21 hot track kids....great stuff. His cover of NIN's "Hurt" is still the most amazing to me, the way he twists it and totally and completely makes it his OWN. The mark of a great cover. So Morrissey is tomorrow and I still haven't seen Spidey 3. I hear people are walking out of it?? Gimme a damn break. Get the fuck outta here with that nonsense. Not because it's Spiderman but, really, how will you KNOW if it's that "bad" if you don't watch the film from start to finish?? Moving right along....Morrissey is tomorrow night. This time tomorrow I may be writing a review of the concert, right here for your reading pleasure/pain. In the meantime, I need to sleep....what a day. Signing off, sincerely yours, straight up and down.....word to the third. Go listen to the man in black dammit.....

MIDNIGHT in a PERFECT WORLD

2007-05-04T20:27:00.000-07:00

It's not midnight...about 3 hours shy from that. The sounds of DJ Shadow's "Endtroducing" are coming out the speakers. It's ridiculously good. The last show I went to was DJ Shadow back in September - amazing. No wait, it was Public Enemy in December. Two of my all time favorites right there. Another one of my favorites will be here on Sunday and I'm going to the show - Morrissey. Granted I haven't really been listening to his stuff for the past 6-7 years now, there's no denying the greatness of his solo material and especially his work with The Smiths. His music played a major role in my life coming up, back in high school and college. I would happily listen to Eric B & Rakim, then throw on a Smiths record, back into some shit by Ice Cube, then throw on Vauxhall & I by Morrissey. Allllll over the damn place, but that's a good thing. Look at my cd collection - RUN DMC to The Verve, A Tribe Called Quest to Nine Inch Nails...Al Green to The Beatles, Rage Against The Machine to Digital Underground. (damn DJ Shadow's beats are sick!!!) Cheers to all those reading - I salute you. Ramble young man ramble. SpiderMan 3 is out today and I couldn't be more excited about it. The first one was good, the second one was great. In fact, is there a better comic book movie than SpiderMan 2? I think not. Batman Begins certainly comes close but those Spidey movies are something else. A comic book come to life. Paris Hilton is going to jail - and surprisingly - it's not for trying to sing. The media seems to be a bit out of control...the Entertainment Tonight's and all that - ready to praise all these celebrities and just as quickly, bring them down. That's kinda sad to me...no wonder so many of them crumble under the pressure. (did I mention DJ Shadow is one bad mutha...? DAMN) Tomorrow I've got my son coming over - my little man. He called me today at work and said "daddy, I'm sorry for being grumpy yesterday". So sweet. That's my boy. Whatever would I do without him? Whatever would I do with half the people in my life? Some people just step up more than others. Some people will let you down, others will exceed your expectations on all levels. Some people will make your head spin, others will make you wanna spin their head straight off. (moooooo!) This blog is really really good for me...it's like therapy, only it's for the entire world to read. I think this internet thing might be catching on. Expect the unexpected. Don't be so set in your ways that you can't welcome in new people and new ideas. I'm sorry if I'm all over the place...stuff comes to me and I type like a madman. 2007 - a horrible year that just might turn out okay after all. One can hope right? No matter the outcome, just gotta keep-keep-keepin' on...doin' the damn thing. Whutitdoo whutitdoo?! I could go for a hot tub right now. My mic sounds nice...check one....my mic sounds nice...check two. Leaving you off with a pic from the PE show....they tore that joint down for 2+ hours....crazy. Lifesaver...it's the FLAVA!! Oh, and shout out to my man Champagne - always got my back - we roll deep........somebody get me another drink......

Fresh for 2007 you SUCKAZZZZZ

2007-05-03T19:37:00.002-07:00

I had Taco Time for dinner tonight - I crave their veggie wraps. For those reading this who don't live in Seattle or the surrounding areas - I'm so very sorry. But if you come to visit, we can swing by, order what you want, get a ice water with lemon. FRESH. I shouldn't have eaten out tonight...it cost me almost $45 to fill up my damn car. I love my damn car but I do not love the price of damn gas. Thanks again Mr.President. I bet he's giggling like a little biz-otch right now, rolling around in money. Where is Michael Moore? Did he get taken out and Fox News covered it up? Something's not quite right there...although I know he is working on a new film...it'll probably be released next month and I just haven't heard anything. (note to self: subscribe to Entertainment Weekly...one of the few magazines out there I can read from cover to cover) I was listening to Brother Ali on the way home (shocking, I can't seem to get it out of the cd player) and he has a line where he says "being rich is not being broke"...I love that. Shit, I like nice things, but I'm not gonna get into debt or go beyond my means to obtain them. I think all that comes in time ANYWAY. Have patience children. Credit cards are big business. I truly am a rambling mess this evening aren't I? Fun. I'm drinking by myself at the moment...just a drink or two every night and I'm good. I would have liked to have had a martini after work tonight...must make future plans for that. Must make future plans for lots of things. So many ideas running around in this damn head of mine. I'm at a leveling out point I think. 3 weeks ago, I couldn't see past the next day...then, suddenly, and without warning, all that changed. I feel like I'm changing and morphing into a new person...a better stronger person. I like the way that feels. Handle your business, eye on the prize. I need to use this time I have alone to my best advantage, whether it's mixing up Boogie Down Volume Five or writing lyrics to Josh's beats. Josh is a guy I work with - he's a 22 year old beat making master. He scares me with how good he is. I'm hooking him up with my man Illus - would love to see an album come about between the two of them...and I wanna get on the mic too. Record an ep or something...put the demons on wax, do some tracks about some personal shit...just put it down. No time like the present, right? Focus. Eye on the prize. Whatever happens, happens for a reason. It may not be clear now, but in time, everything will all make sense. Focus. Boogie down. Ramble young man ramble. Oh, and not to big up myself or anything, but a coworker today thought that I was 21. 32 in July....WHUT?! So I guess I'm done for now...gonna try and get on here more often to unload all these random thoughts in my head. Thanks for reading...thanks for being so damn fly....

OL' GRUMPY BASTARD

2007-05-02T22:02:00.000-07:00

Knock it off. What's your deal? You post one thing every 2 months and now you're doing 2 posts in less than an hour? Ridiculous. Thank you Absolut Vanilla - how I love you so.
I'm good. I'm great actually. People are worried about me. My mom tells me she loves me. My dad gives me hugs instead of hand shakes. The end of the world must be near....but I promise I'm good.
If I didn't have to go to work in the morning I'd probably watch Heathers, then maybe catch a red eye flight to NYC - go to the Bronx to have a slice of pizza for breakfast, take the train to Brooklyn to have a new tattoo done, walk in Central Park with my iPod on random, take in a show on Broadway (maybe Cats, I've seen that shit twice...WHUT?!) or getting to see Spider Man 3 there would be FRESH. Also wanna stop in somewhere and get some new shelltoes, do a little record shopping...and I know exactly who I'd take with me....

POST some new ISH!!!

2007-05-02T21:15:00.001-07:00

An interview with M-Eighty is coming soon....but in the meantime, ME and my ramblings. First up, go ahead and do a Google search on me - type in Baird Warnick - and you'll end up right here on this page. If anyone is looking for me, ka-blam, here I am.
I'd like to escape from all this but things are actually starting to level out a bit in my life. While I withdraw from people and keep others at a safe distance, I welcome new and interesting people into my world. People who are genuine, people who, for a lack of a better term, keep it real.
(sidenote: watch When Keepin' It Real Goes Wrong off the Chappelle Show - genius)
I am going through all these up's and down's emotionally...just when I think I'm getting close to "back to normal" (whatever that means) there's another speed bump along the way. Some people just need to keep their mouth shut - especially if your opinion wasn't asked for in the first place. "Well I think"..."Well, if you wanted my opinion"..........did I ask for it? No? SHUT THE FUCK UP. For real, if shit you're about to babble about is not going to be productive or help a person in any way, other than loving the sound of your own voice - KNOCK IT OFF.

I'm done....for the moment......

MAXWELL

2007-04-21T22:45:00.000-07:00

I have more bad days than good - yet somehow - my boy keeps me going. A select few in my life keep me going. Music keeps me going too. I have not been truly MOVED by hip hop in quite some time. I stand by it, through all the bullshit releases, cause I believe in it. While it's not like it was in 86 when I started listening to it, every now and then, someone will come along to blow my mind. The album is "The Undisputed Truth" and the emcee is Brother Ali - truly putting it down with raw uncut emotion, mixing it up with political and battle rhymes. One song in particular that speaks directly to me is "Faheem" - dedicated to his son. I can only hope to write something as amazing as this for Max one day....

I ain't never met a child quite like you
Words don't suffice for me to describe you
You have a genuine goodness inside you
I watch you and wonder if I was ever like you
It's me and you brother for life
So when you put me in the ground look for me in the clouds
You make me the definition of proud
Taught me what this life is really about

MC SERCH interview

2007-04-21T20:43:00.000-07:00

Flatline: What I've always admired about you is your passion and your dedication to hip hop - I think it's unparalleled. How tired are you of certain people questioning your place in hip hop?

MC Serch: You know it's funny, those that do have a good reason and I don't question it, but I really don't get that anymore. Most people don't question my place in hip hop...most people understand what my role is and understand my position and what part I play in the culture. Most people appreciate that I am who I am. I've never kinda claimed to be anything else...my beliefs are still my beliefs. I believe this is a Black art form and Black music in a Black culture and it has to be respected. I still believe that great hip hop music is based on a great emcee saying extraordinary things over a hot beat. Those kinds of things still hold true to me and I'm very close to those kinds of beliefs. That's why, if you look at the amount of artists that we worked with at Serchlite Music, you can count them all on one hand. We don't really choose to work with a lot of artists cause we really don't feel like a lot of artists fit into that legendary status...fit into that mold of taking the legacy of hip hop to the next level. Like our early involvement with Nas, O.C. and Non Phixion - I think that speaks highly of what our belief system is and who we are.

Flatline: I've always been curious, going back to 89, what was it like getting to work with The Bomb Squad in their prime?

MC Serch: It was very interesting. I mean, those three guys - The Bomb Squad was Hank Shocklee, Keith Shocklee and Eric "Vietnam" Sadler. Eric was, to me, the producer. Keith was the street guy who made sure the street was gonna love it and the beat was hot - the engineer. Hank was the guy who kinda put the stamp of approval, who did the final mixing, came in and listened and then was on to other things. I loved working with Eric Sadler. It was a great pleasure being in the studio with him, watching him make "Oval Office" and "Steppin' To The A.M."...and you know, him really believing in us and what we were trying to make. He understood that it wasn't a gimmick. We were trying to make great rap records...

Flatline: ...and timeless material, that still holds up today...

MC Serch: Yeah, exactly. That's exactly right.

Flatline: They were clearly eye to eye with you guys on that. You can go back and listen and it's still fresh now...

MC Serch: Yeah, it's really amazing to me, you know, that it worked out that way...as a lot of classic stuff really is. You can still listen to "Southernplayalisticadillacmuzik", you can still listen to "Nation Of Millions", you can still listen to "All For One", "The Chronic" and the first Snoop Dogg album...certain shit just resonates forever. Great music lasts forever. These producers we manage have a motto - "classic shit breaks the rules" and it's so true. That's the kind of music you wanna be around. If it's not classic and it's not really resonating to the next level then why do it? That's what was such a great part of working with The Bomb Squad in their prime - everything they were doing from 89 to 91 wound up being classic.

Flatline: Are there any plans for a 20th anniversary deluxe edition of "The Cactus Album", complete with a dvd featuring all the videos?

MC Serch: You know what, I met with someone who would love to do it. I met with a guy named Dennis Smart who handles the re-issue division for Universal and unfortunately, based on all of the legal or lack of legal on that album, I think they're very nervous about trying to make that record happen. It's definitely been spoken about and it's definitely been talked about. It's just that the early, early Def Jam legal wasn't the best legal in the world and I believe they are very worried about lawsuits and sample clearance. I think they're really concerned about what the legal is gonna cost on doing that.

Flatline: Sounds like the same kind of thing that Chuck is going through in trying to re-release "Nation Of Millions" and "Fear Of A Black Planet"...

MC Serch: I told Chuck just a while ago, if he wants to do a class action suit against Def Jam, I'm with him. You can't get an answer out of them and they don't treat you with respect. I spoke with the head of legal at Def Jam...guy looked at me...first of all, he didn't know who I was. How you gonna be head of Def Jam and you don't know who 3rd Bass is?! The modern music business doesn't really understand the value of their catalogue and they don't know how to utilize it. I tried to buy back my masters. I called and said, let me just buy back the album. I'll deal with the legal, no problem...never got a call back. Welcome to the modern music business.

Flatline: Let's talk about this new album - "M.any Y.oung L.ives A.go: The 1994 Sessions" - which is being distributed digitally. It's tracks from your second solo album that never came out, and the material is great. How come it's only surfacing now?

MC Serch: I didn't know where the masters were and I wasn't really looking for them to be honest. When I moved to Detroit in 2002, over 600 boxes from my house came with me. Me and my wife kinda got to the last of the boxes at the end of last year and I came across this heavy box. It turned out to be all the masters. So I was like, let's listen to these and what I discovered was this 25 year old emcee who was making some hot little joints. So I decided to get back into the lab and digitally remix and re-master them. I worked with DJ Mark Allen on them and his ear is just pristine. We gave it that warmth and fuzziness from 94...

Flatline: Exactly. If "Return Of The Product" was a double album, this could be the second disc...

MC Serch: Right, exactly. You nailed it right on the head of what we were trying to accomplish with the record.

Flatline: There's also the three unreleased 3rd Bass tracks on the album and they have a more mature sound to them. Do you ever wonder what the reunion album may have sounded like?

MC Serch: Yeah, unfortunately, with where Pete and I were in our lives, we just couldn't make it happen. Me, Pete and Rich were three different individuals at that time. I love the way "Out To Bat" feels and I love the way "Cats In The Cradle" feels. I just think those records have a great feeling to them. You know, it would have been fun...if, you know...if we would have had more time, if we would have had more availability. It would have been great. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

Flatline: With 3rd Bass, and then when you went solo, you always had an outlet to perform live, whether it was on Arsenio or In Living Color. Do you think the art of performance is lost in hip hop?

MC Serch: Absolutely, absolutely. I mean, the whole aspect of putting a show together...currently we're working on a section of our website that's going to be called "Serchlite Certified Hip Hop". We'll have these young artists, who we feel are really high level, high quality classic hip hop...and we want to give these artists a chance to be heard and seen. I'm dealing with this artist named Mr.Wrong and we were talking about stage presence and performance. It was refreshing to actually hear that he cared about where he was gonna be on stage when a particular song came on. That is the kind of thing that is missing and lacking in hip hop and I also think it's one of the reasons why the Jay Leno's don't have rappers on that much anymore. Have a show! That's why it's so great when you see Outkast on David Letterman - they have a show, it's always a performance. Not for nothing, when Lupe Fiasco did David Letterman with Jill Scott...that's one of my favorite performances of the year.

Flatline: Is there any particular moment in your career that you're most proud of?

MC Serch: ummm...no. I mean, I'm pretty proud of all of them. They're just incredible individual moments. I think the week that Nas' album came out is a pretty proud moment, when "Illmatic" first came out. I think that week, when the album dropped was a pretty amazing week. You know what, I don't think I have any singular proud moment...they're all kinda just great levels of pride that I have for every moment. I wish different things. I wish O.C. would have been signed to a different record label when "Word...Life" came out.

Flatline: Do you have the recording bug again? Are we ever going to hear another solo album from you?

MC Serch: Yeah, I mean, I go into the studio all the time and I just worked on this project that's 100% for charity called "Peace In The Middle East". Basically, it's a project with Jewish and Palestinian artists coming together to promote peace. Matisyahu is on it and we got beats from some great Palestinian and great Jewish artists and 100% of the proceeds are going to orphanages in Palestine and Israel that take children who lost their parents in the war. So we're working on that, putting the final touches on the recording process of that album. You know, I'm always dropping a 16 here and there...I just worked with this group of emcee's in Detroit called The Kardi Boys and we're putting out their record...and, you know, just a bunch of stuff.

- Flatline for rapstation.com

INTERVIEWS GALORE

2007-02-23T22:17:00.000-08:00

First off, I'd like to thank the iTunes Store in Canada for having 20+ Massive Attack remixes for me to download. No thanks to the iTunes Store in the U.S. which has a monsterous.....*counting*.....ONE remix to purchase. Massive Attack (remixed by peeps like Underdog, Portishead, UNKLE, Mad Professor and Underworld) has been my soundtrack for this evening.

For the past 3+ years I have been given quite the amazing opportunity. I get to write on or interview anyone I please in the world of hip hop. This opportunity was presented to me by Chuck D of Public Enemy. We met at a lecture back in 2002, kept in touch, and a year later he asked me to write for one of his sites - Rapstation.com. I've been able to speak with people I grew up listening to and it's been nothing short of incredible getting to chop it up with some legends in the game.

Below are past interviews I've done with Mr.Kaves from Lordz of Brooklyn, Akrobatik, MC Ren from NWA, Masta Ace, R.A. The Rugged Man, Yo-Yo, Outlawz, Dilated Peoples and CL Smooth.

MC Serch from 3rd Bass coming soon........

P E A C E

CL SMOOTH interview (11/18/2006)

2007-02-23T22:11:00.000-08:00

Flatline: You came out in the early 90's with Pete Rock and released some timeless material. What kind of memories do you have from that special time in hip hop?

CL Smooth: Just everything being new, everything being a new experience, to be accepted by the public. To be a part of some great projects...and just being able to be heard.

Flatline: You hooked up with DJ Krush in 96 for "Only The Strong Survive" on MoWax. How did the two of you get together and what was it like working with him?

CL Smooth: From traveling, just meeting different people and he was one of the people I met and I dug his music. I dug his enthusiasm, so working with him wasn't a problem. He's a DJ and very talented and from another part of the earth that I was new to experience. The reception that I got over there from the record was phenomenal. It was an impact record in my career.

Flatline: There was always talk of you doing a solo album but nothing ever came to reality. What were you doing when you weren't recording?

CL Smooth: Just living life and taking care of business that needed to be taken care of. As far as my personal life and beyond the music, finding out who I was...what I'm meant to do beyond the music and setting that up, to maintaining a certain lifestyle and a certain amount of self respect, so that when I returned I would have things to write about and I would be in a better position to be able to promote it, and most of all, enjoy it.

Flatline: You made appearances on both of Pete Rock's solo albums, and there was always this buzz about the two of you getting back together. Did you both feel that it was just best to leave the legacy intact as it is?

CL Smooth: Well, you know, I can only speak for myself...you know, I thought around the time of the early millennium that I was anticipating that we would reunite and give the people what they wanted. But when it didn't work out and I realized that our creative juices were going other places, through that disappointment of not making it, I wanted to put the energy into something because I had worked so hard to get back to that point, to be successful. So, you know, I put it into this album because I know success, a lot of times, is very scary and the element and mind state you have to be in to be successful. It weighs a lot. So I was fully committed, and to hold no grudges, I just put all the energy and focus into my first solo project which I'm very proud of.

Flatline: To me, personally, "American Me" is a triumph and one of the best albums this year. What was the writing process like and how long did it take for the project to be completed?

CL Smooth: Oh, it didn't take long, because during the time I wasn't making records I was developing my art, I was crafting it and honing it to be better, to come back much better. Sort of like a pitcher who gets an operation and he has to take the whole year off and he's doing all his therapy and all his work and come to find out, a lot of pitchers come back even better than before. I felt like it was all about preparation and how you live and what's your process and commitment to be taken seriously. I totally took myself and my craft seriously and tried to commit myself to maximize my potential and effort the best way I could. That was to go in the studio and really give it all I had, and I felt that I did.

Flatline: Absolutely. One thing that I love about this project is that it's a true solo album, there's not a million guest spots on there...

CL Smooth: Yeah, I wanted to just give people an opportunity to know that there are very few artists who feel they're interesting enough to make a full record, a full album, rather than be watered down. And I know that rap is in a grave situation where, you know, you need true artists to return. I wanted to be one of those who committed to that movement.

Flatline: It's like you never left...

CL Smooth: Yeah, I feel like I never left. I really, truly have something to say.

Flatline: That brings us to "The Terrorism Interlude" on the album where you kind of unload about "a holy war worth billions" in less than sixty seconds. Was there more that you wanted to touch upon on that track?

CL Smooth: No, not necessarily. You know, a lot of times it's the little things that are said, more than just whole songs that are focused on, cause we take for granted that a whole song is just a whole song. When we get an element of a message, sometimes it's very short, it's very to the point and those, a lot of times, get more across than actual songs.

Flatline: What's something in hip hop or something about hip hop that you don't like?

CL Smooth: Just the stigmatism that certain artists, when they get into trouble, that it just reflects on the whole game and I feel that when, you know, the person does something right or wrong, they speak for themselves, they don't speak for the majority. Most of all, we need to create a balance in this game and I feel that, I'm voting towards that way. I'm committing myself to a campaign to go towards that way.

Flatline: Are you going to tour in support of the album?

CL Smooth: Oh definitely. One of the things I'm proud of, alongside or above my studio work is my commitment to have a great show. I feel that a lot of times we are caught up in the limelight and we fail to entertain and that's one thing I'm fully committed to. I'm fully committed to entertain.

Flatline: There's so many different musical influences on this album from jazz to rock to reggae that I could see you going out on the road with a live band...

CL Smooth: That's one of the things I wanted the people to decide - how they want me. The people to decide, it is good or not? The people to decide, whether I continue, because I need their help. I need their vote and their support in knowing that. These are the creative venues and opportunities that I opened up for myself. Is it rightfully so? Would I be changing the element of or compromising the element of where I'm coming from by adding a live band?

Flatline: Well, having a band like The Roots backing you up would be amazing...

CL Smooth: It would be amazing and I can picture that now. It would be a great chemistry and that's what it's all about, for people to know that, for CL to make records, the chemistry has to be right.

Flatline: One final question for you. How does it feel to have officially released "the type of heat that makes Pete squirm"?

CL Smooth: (laughs) My whole thing with that line was to reflect on the people that I thought would be on my side and weren't. They didn't believe it could be done and it's being done. Surprisingly, like, it's like a guy that you won all the whole championships with and he's not impressed by anything you do. Even when you score fifty points in a game, even when you come at your highest level he's not impressed unless you're on his music. But I'm here to let you know that with the success of this project and provin' and letting the people speak, that it just gives it a greater opportunity for me to return with Pete and finally close, you know, the door and the chapter...or, open up a greater beginning. I'm very optimistic and very happy with how my life is going right now that I can only think optimistic, even when it's bleak and dim.

- Flatline for rapstation.com

_____FLATLINE_____