THE NEXT EPISODE

So I've had a hell of a day...it started off nice enough, sun shining down, mid 60's on the way to work, a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Then, disaster...almost. Dodged a bullet. I've really and truly got some great people who back me up, who look out for me when times are rough. Please hold...I need a drink up in this biz-otch fa-shiz-otch. ((hold music)) Thank you for reading, we'll be with you shortly. ((more hold music)) Be sure and ask Baird what's the time, cause it's about that time. ((even more hold music)) Whut-whut-whut-whut's the time? To the...to the A.M. ((hold music ends)) Okay, thank you for holding, how may I ramble for you this evening? Last night, the Absolut was flowing like water and I was drinking it just like that. Sometimes it just has to be done. Sometimes you really just gotta stop and look around and wonder what's the point of all this? You just can't make everyone happy. Sometimes, people come into your life and you think they're cool enough but then they end up talking about themselves and rambling like a muthafucka about nothing and, it's just like, really? REALLY?! I don't have time for that nonsense. You will be shut down. Shut'em down, shut'em down, shut'em-shut'em down. In the past, I'd put on the smile and be like "oh really? wow"...now, I call you on your bullshit. I take it straight to your face, like, BLAM, what's up now?!? I'm tired of the bullshit. I like to keep a select few close to me and not let go. Like this, that and this and uh....it's like that and like this and like that and uh....it's like THIS. HOT TO DEATH. HOTTER than hot to death. In the sun today, according to the Passat at 6:30 driving away from Target - 90 muthafunkin' degrees. I'm melting. This is no joke. I ain't no joke, I used to let the mic smoke. Max grabbed one of my sharpies (I love sharpies, ask anyone) and wrote "max" on his leg...taggin' it UP! That's my boy. It's starting to cool down a bit...it was like a damn sauna in here when I got home tonight. Like, boom, bam, gawd DAMN. Sorry, this one is littered with random hip hop quotes. Are you keeping score? Six random quotes from 3rd Bass, Public Enemy, Dr.Dre, Everlast, Eric B & Rakim and Ice Cube. Watch me get down and just do my thing baby. Whoops, make that seven - Busta Rhymes - who still can't make a decent album. He releases the most insane singles but somehow, still can't put together something you can listen to from start to finish. Oh well, perhaps a reunion of Leaders Of The New School would be fresh. So really, above all, in the grand scheme of things, no matter what, stay fly and do it-do it-do it......uh huh

PUT it on ME

Alright, so it's been a minute - but I keep this ish coming. (shout out to the Warrior Of Chaos and Baby G!) Remember when LL tried going extra hardcore on "14 Shots To The Dome"...? That didn't quite work out...but it did contain one of the best song titles ever: "Pink Cookies In A Plastic Bag Getting Crushed By Buildings". What the fuck L? So it is HOT TO DEATH right about now and only getting hotter tomorrow - mid 80's. MADNESS. I'll be melting up in this joint. I had Max the past 4 days, MC Ron (my dad) came into town, braved the retardness of IKEA during their no tax sale, got Max a real deal bed, complete with a tent over the mutha. Love it. Watched a classic 2 nights ago - Caddyshack - still funny after all these years. Rodney, Chevy and Bill Murray really DO THE DAMN THING in that one. Listening to KRS ONE at the moment....KRS ONE! ROCK ONNNNNNN!! SOUTH BRONX! SOUTH-SOUTH BRONX! Rappaz R N Dainja! That's the SOUND OF THE POLICE! Yes yes y'all. KRS ONE and the legendary MARLEY MARL just released an album together - should make a little history me thinks. Gotta snatch that one up on Thursday when I meet up with Mr.Chaos for coffee at the world famous Easy Street Records. If you come to Seattle, you gotta go - I find gem after gem after gem there. Sure, you can download music all you want from Russia, but when you go into a store and dig-dig-dig to find that one album or single missing from your collection....man, that's a beautiful thing right there. I'm back on the Absolut Vanilla...also Corona's with lime cause that ish is tasty right there. Met up with Sam man and his boys, Andrew and Sophomore for breakfast yesterday morning. Gotta say, I missed my nephews. No matter the situation, nothing can change the fact that I'm proud of them. One of them about about to graduate from high school and head off to college, the other is growing up faster than I can keep up, planning on becoming a top chef - truly doing it. Amazing. I'm a proud uncle. ROYALTY. Nothing less than the best. Stay fly. The sun is setting now...been blasting on my back as I've been typing this up. HAWT. Would really like to get a MacBook so I can be portable with this...would like to do a lot of things. Good things come to those who wait. Everything happens for a reason. Can't have what you want now, chill and get it later. Come on and get rhythm, when you get the blues. JOHNNY CASH up in this mutha. Gonna do it, do it, do it. Bartender, another drink please. Thank you kindly. Babble young man babble. I hope you're all having wonderful mornings and afternoons and evenings. Throw on some De La Soul and stay fly. So fly...all day, every day.

I'm RELOADED! OKAY?!!!?

[VERSE]
Nothing in this world got me like you do baby
I'd give up my soul
If I couldn't sing with you daily
I'm not the only girl
In love with you it's crazy
I appreciate your groove
Now I know I owe everything to you

[CHORUS]
Music
I'm so in love with my music
The way you keep me
Movin
Ain't nobody doing what you're doing
Doing, doing
So bring me back to the day
When tape decks press play
DJ drop the needle til the
Record just break
You are my sunlight
You are the one mic
That sound so sweet because the beat just inspires me
Ooh

[VERSE]
No limit to your mind
Your endless love is open
To every race and kind
Could it be your blood runs golden
Baby if this world were mine
We would be singing in the Key of Life
When you're gone I can't survive
Cause I just can't be without my

[CHORUS]
Music
I'm so in love with my music
The way you keep me
Movin
Ain't nobody doing what you're doing
Doing, doing
So bring me back to the day
When tape decks press play
DJ drop the needle til the
Record just break
You are my sunlight
You are the one mic
That sound so sweet because the beat just inspires me
Ooh

[Lauryn]
Colours of sound
Scales and beauty
Audio scenery
Electric love and
Rhythmic symmetry
Written in memory
Beautifully crafted scenery
Complex or simplicity
Sonic energy
Piercing insensitivity
Sympathetic poetry
For some even identity
Collective entity
Something to belong to
A source of energy
The possibilities
Wave lengths and bandwith
Higher vibration
Energizing entire lands with
Or stand for
Lovers to walk hand in hand with
then plan for
Sanctuary chords
Harmony, melodies, even riffs can be
Disguised human essence
Sonically bottled ecstasy
Or melancholy
Agony blues angst
Exercising anxieties
Fueling entire societies
Making economies
Stimulating generating
Inspiration synonymously
Entertaining expression
Intangible invisible but undeniable
Plays the language of excitement on survival
Some call it tribal
But perspective is everything
Connected to everything
Some say collectively everything

[CHORUS]
Music
I'm so in love with my music
The way you keep me
Movin
Ain't nobody doing what you're doing
Doing, doing
So bring me back to the day
When tape decks press play
DJ drop the needle til the
Record just break
You are my sunlight
You are the one mic
That sound so sweet because the beat just inspires me
Ooh

NY to SEATOWN we get DOWN

First off - Happy birthday Stacie. I had this wonderful vodka and honey martini earlier today after getting my hair cut so cheers to you. Cheers to you too. I could really go for some spring rolls right about now. So last night, after a slight 24 hour delay, I met up with the Sam man over in Kirkland for dinner and drinks and plenty of conversation. The vsop was flowing all night and I had a great time. Put a call into Serafin and he met up with us for more drinks. If we had cigars we would have smoked them. Somehow someway, we keep comin' up with funky fly shit like every single day. JUICY. When the words come to me, I type as fast as I can...can you keep up? Follow me - life is too short to be unhappy. Get rid of the negative and get positive, stay positive, get focused, stay focused. If anyone needs me, I'll be in Phuket next summer...or maybe a return visit to Helsinki. One way or another I'm going somewhere. Don't let obstacles get in your way of obtaining true happiness. Do whatever it takes to get to a spot in life where you feel balanced. Balance is huge. Day in, day out, you get into these damn routines - mix it up and cross the fader as I get down like an elevator. Speaking of which, Lisa Gale (from high school) and her husband Cole paid a surprise visit to Seattle yesterday. We ended up at the EMP which I hadn't really explored before. The hip hop section was AMAZING. Afrika Bambaataa, Kool Herc, Grandmaster Flash, Kurtis Blow and a host of graffiti writers were all represented. Tons of old school pics from the Bronx when things were jumping off in the early 80's. Mindblowing. I feel like I'm typing in slow motion - uhhh, I like it like that. David Gray anyone? So tired. Been up until all hours of the morning recently. Can't help it...sometimes the system just doesn't wanna shut down...but it will now. Or maybe in 5 minutes from now. Starbucks, as much as I try not to support their bazillion dollar company, has this freaking amazing orange mocha at the moment. Insanely good. I gotta get one tomorrow morning. Coffee is the worst damn addiction. $3+ a pop every day....cha-ching. Can someone pass me a winning lotto ticket? Peace and I'm out. G'd up from the feet up. Today was tough, tomorrow will be better and the day after that, even better than the days before that. Stay focused and stay positive. Party people in the place, from Seatown to the BX to Helsinki town.....stay FLY.

AIN'T NUTHIN' but a "G" THANG

Unfadeable so please don't try and fade this. Last night - I was FADED, tired out of my skull. I had one drink and felt like I could pass out at 8:45. Ridiculous. I managed to keep myself awake until 10-ish but was unable to focus long enough to get the blog together. I crashed out until 2 in the morning when I was awakened by the sounds of chirping stupid ass fucking BIRDS outside my window. I also thought I heard my phone ring but was clearly in an Ambien-enhanced state of mind. I think I might live with a ghost. My light out in my living room turned itself on...TWICE, the other night. Freaked me out a bit. I don't think I live with a ghost - I think I have a light with a short in it or something. I have seen a ghost. My friend was killed in a horrible car accident...he came to me, in my doorway and said "sucks doesn't it?" before I even knew he was dead. Freaky. Oh, and be careful with those water bottles with the twisty caps...water can shoot out of them like a geyser. (I have no idea how to spell that...I believe it's the first time I've ever used the word in a sentence before) Today, I will get my hair cut and then, hopefully, meet up with Sam man later tonight for a drink-e-drink. Ever be sitting with someone and they're telling you a story and you get chills cause you feel like you've heard it before? Yeah, it's called deja vu. I know that, but I swear I get it A LOT. I always have. Freaky deaky freaky deaky. The people who live next door to me are moving out today...and are being insanely loud about it. Knock it off. Gotta get outta here soon. To the north, south, east and west - stay fly. Eat some vegetable chips - they're delicious. Front to back, right to left, keep it on all night, make it HOT TO DEATH......

ONE STEP AHEAD of the SPIDER

One blog missing. No post last night. What happened? Are you alright? Did you bump your head and forget your password? Did you completely forget about all of us? I'm BACK. I'm sippin' on Absolut Ruby Red and 7Up...tasty. Refreshing. Cool and crisp for all the people up top, check this out. FLY. Beyond fly. Stay fly. Keep that movin' and rock rock and don't stop. I have a myspace page now. It's ridiculous. The homie out in Helsinki hooked me up without me asking - Champagne does the damn thing. It cracked me up. This is still my SPOT but big up's to him for taking the time. I will say it over and over again, the myspace page layout is wiggety-wiggety-wiggety wack. Doesn't seem logical to me. The only thing I really like about myspace is that you open it up and BLAM - music playing. Champagne knows me well so he threw on Bush Killa by Paris. www.guerrillafunk.com Check that with a quickness. You'll find an article or two I did on Paris and Guerrilla Funk in the press section. Paris is a cool guy, making the kind of music that, since 1990, smacks you upside the head with the truth. Get with the program. I got my Carlito's Way t-shirt today. Dope. SO FLY. I can't feel my face. Kidding. I joke I joke. All the time. Jokes. Did you see my painting? I got it at Target. Christopher Walkin on SNL is classic. I gotta have more cowbell! I got so many peeps that surround me, going through the kind stuff I've been going through the last 5 months. I wanna be there for all of them. I'm coming out of it now, stronger than ever, ready to bust back - got my strap and I'm ready to cap. On the real - there for all of them. Whatever they need, I'm here. I've been through the battle and come out with scars but I'm okay. This crazy ass shit is beyond your control sometimes. IT IZ WHUT IT IZ. Sometimes people just grow apart...sometimes you think you know someone and you really don't. Sometimes people just aren't meant to be together forever....and somehow, even though that's extremely difficult, that's okay. You gotta stand up for your happiness. You've gotta know that, while today might be tough, tomorrow is going to be better. Time heals that ish. Oh, and for real, fuck y'all who come through with your bullshit "well I think" and this and that - lemme put you in check right quick - fuck you, I didn't ask what you think. All I need is support. Get a grip. Don't push me cause I'm close to the edge...I'm tryin' not to lose my head. 8:11 on a Thursday night. I'm gonna get together with Sam man tomorrow - he's going through some ish right now, and I'll be damned if I'm not gonna be there for him. He was there for me, back in December/January and he's always had my back...I've always looked up to him. That's a great man right there. If you've met him, you know it. If you haven't, allow me to introduce you. One of my peeps I hold close to my heart. There's a handful. True colors have been shining through over the past couple months. I know who's got my back and who doesn't. I see y'all. Keep your friends close but your enemies closer. Some say I got a way with words...piece'em all together one by one and look what I came up with. STAY FLY. On the real to real, stay fly. I got your back....

THIRTY THOUSAND FEET

Rock rock and don't stop...keep keep keep it on. With 35 minutes to spare I'm actually getting on here before the clock strikes midnight and my Ambien kicks in with a quickness. This post has been brought to you by the makers of Absolut Ruby Red. Where have you been all my life? It's good. Maybe not as good as the Vanilla which I grew accustomed to (and who you can thank for half these blogs) but still pretty damn good. Tasty. I was driving home tonight and looked over to my left - Starbuck's headquarters. It's freaking huge and they plan on expanding it. Nuts. I'd like to give a shout out to Java Love up on Beacon Hill. I've been going there for YEARS, before Max was born, and it's still the best coffee in Seattle and Oscar, the owner, is still the nicest. Love to support the little guy if at all possible. Max and I went in there on Saturday morning and ain't a damn thing changed. Check it out for yourself if you don't believe me. Damn...tired. I wish I had a condo or a house that overlooked the Seattle skyline...somewhere maybe in West Seattle, looking out over everything. So fly. I heard it went past the 77 degrees they were predicting for today. All I know is that it was HOT TO DEATH. Straight up and down. Ambien is messin' with me...gotta close up shop now before I start reciting WuTang Clan lyrics and not remember a damn thing about it in the morning. What a night. So fly. Keep keep keepin' on........(oh, and note to Jessica Alba - stop posing for GQ and all these other magazines with little clothing if you want to be "taken seriously as an actress"...it's annoying already. Knock it off).....okay, really signing off this time.....what a random rant....g'ed up from the feet up...how we do...what it do?......ramble young man ramble.........FLY....

$100 worth of CUCUMBERS & BANANAS

Monday evening, the blog is on...let me clear my throat now! Puerto Rico! Black people! White people! Old people! As soon as I get done writing this, I need to check into tickets for Walking With Dinosaurs and for A Day Out With Thomas. Max will flip if we can go to one/both of those. The Pacific Science Center has a new dinosaur exhibit opening up, plus a new dinosaur IMAX film at the end of the month. Dopeness for my little boy. My headlight has been out on the Passat for quite some time now...$40 to have a new one put in at a place right around the corner from my work. I can deal. 70+ degrees today as expected and hotter tomorrow...HOT TO DEATH. I polished off my Absolut Vanilla tonight....that...well, that didn't take very long. Feel like I just got that bottle last week...think it was more like 2+ weeks ago. Must get more. Delicious. What else is going on? OH...I meant to post about this yesterday. Max and I went grocery shopping on Saturday and we're about to drive away. I'm approaching the stop sign and a woman, walking out of the store drops at least $20 on the ground, kicks it and keeps on walking, not realizing what she has done. I see it all happen and watch as a couple walking behind her pick it up and pocket it. They didn't see her drop it. What do you do? I looked back and she was gone and that bastard had her money...that would have bought me a couple cd's (or some more Absolut!) if I was the one walking behind her! I wouldn't have pocketed it. I would have given it back to her, cause I'm nice like that. Stay fly on the regular, all day, every day. I was just thinking - this is kinda like my diary I kept when I was 7. Today we went to the store and it rained. Today I played outside with my sister. Today my dad took me to get ice cream. I am hoping to hell this is better reading than all that. How much longer can I really keep this up? Day in, day out, blog in, blog out...babble babble babble. I think I will sign off here. Tune in tomorrow true believers. So fly.......(speaking of which, the t-shirt I found and ordered after I posted last night is below).....soooo damn fly......

THWIP!

Spiderman...Spiderman....does whatever a spider can....except make a good third movie. If you haven't seen Spiderman 3 and want to, you may wanna skip over this next part. So I went to see Spiderman 3 finally...alone. It was the first movie I had ever been to alone and it was an odd experience. Not so much going IN to the movie but coming OUT of the movie...who do I talk to about it afterwards? Myself? I guess so. Before I get into Spidey, my prediction is that the new Adam Sandler movie will bomb horribly although, like all his movies of the last 10 years, it will make a ton of money. The best preview of the bunch was for Balls Of Fury. Check the screen shots of Christopher Walken - http://imdb.com/title/tt0424823/ - awesome. Spiderman 3 was good, but not great, and extremely uneven and all over the place....kinda like trying to read this blog of mine without drinking heavily. It lacked the HEART of the first two and the pacing was really off. Sandman turned into this giant...um...sand man and it was wwwway over the top. Venom was pretty cool although if you blink you'll miss him. Too many characters, too all over the place, too much crying! Moving right along...(stay fly)...it's supposed to be 70+ degrees again here in the mighty Seatown tomorrow and Tuesday. I need to take a day (or two) off. Days just for me to do whatever, to just chill, go to the beach, go to the park, zone out with the iPod on random, journey with that ish for a bit. I really do wanna go on a trip though...would be cool to meet up with the homie Champagne in NYC or go visit him again in Helsinki for a fourth time. Wanna eventually meet up with him and Eveliina in Phuket...take a good chunk of time off (and a good chunk out of my bank account) and just go CHILL. The time away would be nice but I know I'd just end up missing Max by day 4 or 5. That little boy is my world. Nothing else really matters...almost nothing. Make it live all night, make it HOT TO DEATH. Can I get anyone else a drink? I downloaded the new Eve single yesterday, produced by Swizz Beats - pretty damn good although I heard her album is not coming out on Aftermath. Hopefully Dre will still be producing some of the cuts on the album and it won't go the way of The Game...or King Tee...or Rakim. What the hell does Dre do all day anyway?? He doesn't produce for THAT many people. Now let me blow ya mind. Is it Monday yet? Oh, and one last thing, coming full circle here - you stupid ass parents who take your 2,3,4,5,6 year olds to Spiderman 3 need to have your heads examined. The movie is crazy violent, earning that PG13 rating. And one last thing, the next person in a movie theater to bring in a bag of RUSTLE CRINKLE CRACKLE NOISE NOISE CAN'T HEAR THE FUCKING DIALOGUE because of your bag of WHATEVER THE HELL THAT IS is gonna get a shelltoe to the back of the head. That's my word. In closing, please continue to remain fly as hell. I have spoken...don't front, ya know I gotcha open.....

HERE COME da PAIN

....and like Carlito Brigante, I'm "reinvigorated and reassimilated" with complex comprehension in my dimension, witness the ascension, runnin' off the mouth with muthafuckin' hypertension. Those lyrics were written by some cat named Flatline about 7-8 years ago now, but they're still FLY as hell right? So fly. So fly. I wasn't planning on writing anything tonight. It's a Saturday night and I should be at the club, gettin' my drink on and my smoke on. Heh. Homie really doesn't do that. But I do feel like writing a symphony...or something. Fact of the matter is, I feel more ALIVE now than I have in recent months. Where I once felt dead, there is a second wind in me - a belief that some good is really REALLY going to come out of all this. I deserve that. My time to be selfish now. I motherfucking deserve that. I feel inspired, I feel empowered, I feel like 07 is actually gonna be one of the best years of my life. Moving forward, gimme that Krylon can and let me REALLY paint the town. BOOGIE DOWN. Carlito's Way, just for the record, is one of the best films ever and absolutely one of Pacino's best, topping the ever-popular Scarface. Scarface was great to me as a teenager but has lost something as I've gotten "older". Carlito's Way on the other hand, is a class act...classy like The Godfather...classy like Heat. Movies I can watch over and over and over again. So I guess this has become a daily thing...70+ peeps have read the ramblings. When I hit 100, I'll let you know. My love...hey...my love...hey...my love...hey..my love...hey. The genuine article is the most attractive thing ever. You'll know it when you see it. You just KNOW. You can feel it. No diggety, no doubt. Tired....it's approaching the 11:30 hour and with me being up past my bedtime the past 2 nights I gotta catch those zzz's. Oh, and Ambien free for the past two nights. I'd recommend the sleeping aid powers of Jack Daniels to anybody. Can't sleep? Drink Jack. Not feeling well? Drink Jack. A shot or two never hurt nobody. Enough of this rambling...typing in the damn dark. Go watch/rent/buy Carlito's Way. I thank you in advance for your continued cooperation. Stay fly...

DOLLAR DOLLAR BILL Y'ALL

UGH. Sooooo....I was sitting here, happily typing away....and freakin' Safari quit on me and I lost everything that I was about to post. Muthafucka. That annoys me to no end...not like sitting in a car going on a 10 hour road trip annoying, but pretty damn annoying. I think I've been on a...15 hour road trip? Seattle to Calgary in a day with my sister. Must have been 14-15 hours...it was hellish. That's just a long freaking drive, period. And while you're driving for that amount of time, don't think about the planes overhead, which could get you to your destination in under 2 hours...and you can drink while flying...unless you're the pilot, then I really would not recommend that and I thank you in advance. UGH. So, back to it. Can't even remember what I was babbling about....something about priorities. Oh yeah - GET them STRAIGHT. Line'em up and knock'em down...do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. You're not happy now? You're in control of that to some small/large degree. Of course it always depends on the situation but, like I really REALLY like to say: It is what it is. Deal with it. Guard your grill, knuckle up. (another Naughty By Nature reference, amazing) Why didn't Treach ever break out and go solo?? Vinnie can't rhyme...Treach ran the show, rhyming circles around dude. Weird. Hip hop hooray bizotches. Jack is my friend tonight, just one shot and I'm good. Max is running a bit of a fever so I gave him some purple medicine, hopefully I've caught it in time. Tired. Was up until a little after midnight last night...just UP. Sometimes my brain refuses to shut off. It's really annoying but, everyone together now: it is what it is. Back to happiness, it comes in waves for me now which I like. Things are changing but changing for the better. I am able to now become whatever I want to become, to be the best person I can be, to learn things, challenge myself, color outside the box a bit, be more open...breathe in the sun. (Perceptionists reference) OH...and you know what book I love (which of course they're going to make into a movie) is "Horton Hears A Who!" by Dr.Seuss. Max got it from the library and I've read it to him twice now. Takes me back to when I was 5 years old. Also shines the light on the fact that Dr.Seuss was smokin' some of that real stickie-icky-icky...oooo weeee! Great book though, for real. Whether you have kids or you don't - go to a book store, pick it up and read it - brilliant stuff. Bartender this glass is empty. I'm gonna post this sucker now before the stupid browser decides to crash again. Signing off, truly yours, thanks for being so fly...so fly...so fly......

Piz-uck Fa-shiz Uck (HA!!)

I wonder what Wolfgang Puck is doing right now? Probably counting all his money from all those frozen pizzas he's been selling!! Do you ever struggle to find the words? Do you ever step on peoples toes by accident? Do you ever read these posts and think to yourself Baird is nuts? I'm not nuts. It's the alcohol. 4 out of 5 posts are alcohol fueled. This one is being written with a (semi) clear mind. I kinda lay it all out there don't I? I write these thoughts of mine many times not realizing, hey, everyone and their mother can read it. It's cool. This is me. It is what it is. Deal with it. If your soul loves the sun, money rock on...1,2 and ya don't stop. (Funkdoobiest reference, sorry) Funkdoobiest performed at my first (and only) emcee competition. Did I stick around to watch them perform? No. Did I realize who they were, that DJ Muggs was the production mastermind behind them? No. Did I have any idea that their debut album "What Doobie U B?" would become one of my all time favorite hip hop records? Nope. The year was 1992 and I decided to enter the emcee competition, me and my man MoPlay who would later be entertained with signing to Nervous Records (then home to Black Moon and Smif N Wessun, major players). He became a mormon, went on his mission and left hip hop behind. While some people may have memories of when they were doin' it out in the park, in the Bronx, breakin' on cardboard, or a RUN DMC concert in Queens where they kicked down the g'damn door....I have a memory of MoPlay, getting on stage and freestyling his whole set - at one point, getting a teddy bear thrown up on stage at him and he started rhyming about the teddy bear. DOPE. Dude, could go off about anything and everything. We'd rock instrumentals in my car and he'd just flow non-stop. Me, I'm more of a writer. Perfecting my lyrics with the pen and the pad, then reciting until they ring in my ears. I've missed that boat, but the homie Josh is about to take the world by storm, possibly producing for some major players, and even if he only produces for the minors and the independent artists, dudes beats are sick. Wow...that Absolut and orange pineapple banana is kickin' in lovely. Feel me...flow. (Naughty By Nature reference) Oh, and back to the emcee competition, I didn't win...not sure I was even on the radar, but it was an amazing thing to get up on that stage and have people FEELING what I was rhyming about. I was heavily influenced, lyrically, by people like KRS ONE, Chuck D, Paris and Rakim, so it was no surprise my lyrics were political in nature. It is what it is. Whutitdoo whutitdoo? Funny, I sat down here, not thinking I'd write much when clearly, that's the opposite. If you must drink, I suggest drinking on the weekend - especially if you're going on a 10 hour road trip. Just sayin'. Bartender, another drink if you please. This kid is on a roll. Dumped ice on the ground making another drink but that's alright with me. My floors, I clean'em. WHUT. I was listening to Ice Cube's "Death Certificate" album today...took it back to 91....OH, and was having pizza for lunch and heard the SAMPLE he used on The Funeral (intro)...what are the chances of that? Anyone craving Indian food? Me too. Hit me off with a veggie samosa, some spinach garlic naan and some aloo gobi and I AM GOOD. Back to "Death Certificate" for a minute - that's a classic album right there, minus "Horny Little Devil" and "Black Korea". The homie Champagne and myself are still saying "peace 5000 g" to this very day because of that damn album. What happened to Cube? Dude was the sharpest on any coast, found some success with Friday and then had to make stupid ass sequels and movies like Anaconda (I don't care if J.Lo is in it!) and Are We There Yet...and then, when he releases his latest album last year it just rings false. Wick-wick-wack. I would recommend, if you don't have some Absolut and Dole orange pineapple banana juice, you might wanna get some....I'm just sayin'. God damn this is getting ridiculously long. Is anyone still reading? For real? Thank you for being so damn fly. Cheers to you and yours and keep this gangsta party movin' for the 07 shot. I'm gone......(look at Cube in that pic, you know that's a plastic gun...keepin' it real son!) Another time, the story of me opening up for Cypress Hill.....INSANE IN THE BRAIN!

WHUT IZ HE GOING TO SAY NOW?

7 days - 7+ posts. This whole blog idea was supposed to be an online collection of all my creations - now it's become random ramblings - but I dig it. So fly. It was another beautiful day in Seattle - the kind of day where you wanna leave work and not come back. I went looking for mother's day cards this afternoon but came back empty handed. I'll have to take Max with me (damn, we should have done that tonight) to look for some. Playstation 3 is sick - and I'm not even into video games. Max plays this one game (in the stores) and the graphics are OFF THE HEEZY FA SHEEZY! (please stop...stop it...stop it right now) 70 degrees again today...would have been nice to hang out at Alki or go to the park or...SLEEP. A nice NAP, laying out in the sun...zzzz. So I was thinking about all the live shows I've been to and decided to come up with a list of all them, kinda in order. Ready? Set? Here they are: Tone-Loc & The 2 Live Crew, Ice-T & The Syndicate, Public Enemy/Anthrax/Primus/Young Black Teenagers, Ice-T & Body Count, Beastie Boys/Sonic Youth/L7, House Of Pain & Rage Against The Machine, Red Hot Chili Peppers/Ministry/Ice Cube/Pearl Jam/Soundgarden/Lush, Consolidated, Meat Beat Manifesto, Snoop Doggy Dogg & Tha Dogg Pound, Cypress Hill, Gene, Spearhead, Del Tha Funkee Homosapien & Souls Of Mischief, James Brown/Maceo Parker/The JB's, Public Enemy, D'Angelo, Eminem & The Beatnuts, Remy Shand, En Vogue, DJ Shadow, Public Enemy & X-Clan, Morrissey. Sooooo...what was my point in listing all these again? I have no idea. My memory does suck from time to time so I suppose it's good I have a written record. Damn I could go for some chocolate cake...and ice cream right about now. Warm it up (kris, I'm about to!) and just eat-eat-eat...delicious. At this point in the evening I clearly have nothing more to say...(babble young man babble).....stay fly.....on the real......HOT TO DEATH.....death by chocolate...

DRINK CITY

So I talked and talked about homie's organic pizza but I've gotta say - that was one damn good pizza. After consuming the pizza I sat down and watched Sin City for a 4th or 5th time...what a piece of work that movie is. Revolutionary in vision and style - just like the damn comic/graphic novel. Clive Owen is a favorite in that, as is Mickey Rourke....and Jessica Alba. Where is Benicio Del Toro? I haven't seen him in anything in ages. Great actor but missed. I was watching "The Daily 10" on E! before I threw on Sin City and apparently, if Robert Rodriguez signs on, Sin City 2 will start filming this summer. Dope. I'm not sure this will be much of a post and it's hard to top the ramblings of the last one. Still haven't seen SpiderMan 3...wah. It probably made another ba-zillion dollars today. Somebody's getting rich and it's not me. Just as a disclaimer - I write these non-stop...literally, non-stop...whatever pops into my head is what ends up on the page. Welcome to my little world. Would you care for a vodka and orange pineapple banana juice? Delicious. I forgot to watch Heroes last night, was too busy creating something, too busy with other stuff on my mind. Whatitdoo...whatitdoo? Damn, I really gotta sign off here as it approaches the 11 o'clock hour. Gotta be up early...jump into the shiny clean Passat and head into work. Maybe I'll try getting up early and....maybe not. Damn me and my 6:08am internal alarm clock. Annoying already, knock it off. This post has been brought to you by the makers of Ambien.....no it has not. Got any apple juice? I'm out...

BEATS to my RHYME just KICKIN'...

...I do not like to eat chicken. But the smell of fried chicken - gimme some of THAT. So I'm lit up like an xmas tree. I'd like to thank the makers of Absolut Vanilla and the very tasty Dole orange pineapple banana juice. You mix that up and I swear it's the best drink EVER. I am currently baking. Baking a Wolfgang Puck ALL NATURAL four cheese, tomato and pesto pizza. How all natural is it? I just don't give a fuckkkkkkkkk. "I'm nicer than Pete, but I'm on a Serch to crush a Miilkbone, I'm Everlastin', I melt Vanilla Ice like silicone"........remember when Eminem was the baddest rapper on the planet? No? Go back and listen to his first 2 albums...no one has EVER flipped it like THAT. Skip past the "faggot' tracks and that "Kim" track but everything else is pretty much all good. Homophobia, not all good. Using the "f" word with that much HATE behind it will get you ejected...and knocked da fuck out man!!! 12 minutes and I've got a pizza. How all natural is it really? It's a FROZEN PIZZA. I'm not looking at the ingredients (damn, that took a minute to spell correctly) and I'm really not concerned with it. Moving on....my son just made his very first sandwich - two pieces of bread with jam in the middle. Awesome. I miss him, he's with his mom tonight. I picked him up from school early cause he was coughing and not breathing quite right. He has borderline asthma and his allergies have been out of control since he was born. I gave him a breathing treatment and he's fine now. Such an amazing little boy. He keeps me going from day to day. Random phone calls from random people keep me going from day to day. I kinda feel like life is just beginning for me. It is what it was and now it is what it is. My quote, my bond, my word - IT IS WHAT IT IS. Deal with it muthafuckaz. I'm playin'. Lit up like a xmas tree....and 5 minutes left on that organic pizza. Song of the moment - Wild Horses - Alicia Keys and Adam Levine unplugged and doin' it. Damn, the sun is shining through my damn window....tryin' to blind your man....can't see...can't type....lit up like a xmas tree. This ish is messed UP. More to come....stay tuned true believers....and if you got liquor in the cabinet - pour some - DAMN. All over the place. Word to Wolfgang Puck. Word to the peeps that keep me smiling day to day - you know who you are. Yeah...YOU. In the words of Wolfgang Puck...or in this case his pizza box "Live, Love, Eat". TRUE DAT. MOS DEF. Okay, I'm back....the buzzer went off....and you know that shit is gonna burn the roof of my mouth if I attempt to eat it in the current state I'm in. Goddamn. Goddamn that DJ made my day...TERMINATOR X!! Let that pizza cool....but I gotta read the back of the box here...."I like to finish the pizza with freshly grated parmesan cheese, a few fresh basil leaves or a sprinkle of oregano".....oh yeah? You do? Muthafucka, I wouldn't be eating your frozen pizza if I had all that! But here's my 5 dollars, you're rich beeeotch!! Wasn't I gonna post this a minute ago?....type type type.......to be continued.............

REBEL YELL

It is hot in the city...hot in the city tonight...tonight....alright. 70+ degrees in this joint...and I'm struggling to find the words. It was a beautiful day in Seattle, sun shining...god damn birds chirping outside my window. (ugh) I woke up with a headache this morning (too much gin & juice?...so tasty) but some (legal) drugs, a couple glasses of water and a mocha later, I was feeling back to normal. Dehydration is never a good thing which is clearly what I was suffering from - that, less than 7 hours of sleep and the ringing of Morrissey in my damn ears. WuTang are coming to Bumbershoot this year...funny, I would listen to the Wu and Morrissey side by side back in 93/94. Speaking of which, would it kill someone to remaster all the early Wu joints and re-release them?? Especially the first Meth album - it sounds like muffled garbage and is still one of my favorites. Come on RZA!! So I'm thinking checking out the Wu live would be a good thing. Oh, and I don't wanna jinx anything but you may hear a friend of mine producing for some Wu projects in the near future. No joke...could be major. I'm real real excited about that. I listened to Johnny Cash all damn today...21 tracks over and over and over again. *yawn* I'll post my interview with M-Eighty that just went up at Rapstation today (thanks Z!) soon...but for now, must sleep, must rest and then come back tomorrow with some new ish. HOT TO DEATH........

M O Z

After listening to the man for the past 16+ years, I have finally SEEN him with my own two eyes. Morrissey.

"You know, sometimes I look out into the crowd and I hear someone yell out "Johnny Marr" and then I look, and it IS Johnny Marr"

Hilarious. I don't know who the opening act was...I was in The Paramount Club with my man T-Diggy, sippin' on gin and grapefruit juice. Shout out to the cheese and the bread paper cracker stuff - delicious. Also to Erik (aka: E-Dub) and Amy, who we met up in there, predicting which Smiths songs he might perform. We were in PRIME seating, right below the main balcony, first row - amazing. (thank you Tracy!!!) Erik said Morrissey had been opening up the show with The Queen Is Dead and they launched right into it...then into 3 or 4 Moz songs that I did not recognize. The last Morrissey album I bought was "Maladjusted"...and yikes....that was in 1997. I feel old. They performed NOTHING from "Vauxhaul and I" which was a little disappointing as it's one of my favorite albums. They played "The Boy With The Thorn In His Side" for about a minute - until he stopped them from playing it because he couldn't hear himself singing - they did not revisit it. "Everyday Is Like Sunday" was a major highlight as well as "Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want". They closed off the show with "You're Gonna Need Someone On Your Side" from "Your Arsenal" which was insanely good. Oh, and they also played "How Soon Is Now" which was incredible. It was an hour and a half ROCK show....but now here's where I've gotta complain, and I think it really falls on the Seattle crowds...they're lame. A handful of people threw flowers....3 people got on stage....there just didn't seem to be a connection between Morrissey and the audience, or for that matter, Morrissey and his band. It was very bizarre at times to me, like he was just going through the motions. Could be just me but don't get me wrong - I am really glad I had a chance to see him...the whole night was first class thru and thru. (where was Brother Rick?)

As I look over at the clock and realize it's 11:35, I am really wishing I did not have to go to work tomorrow. Would much rather chill and watch Walk The Line again or something. With Camp Lo (straight outta the Bronx) playing in the background (talk about a 180 from Morrissey) I am outta here....please please please let me get what I want........

Good times for a change
See, the luck I've had
Can make a good man
Turn bad

So please please please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want
This time

Haven't had a dream in a long time
See, the life I've had
Can make a good man bad

So for once in my life
Let me get what I want
Lord knows, it would be the first time
Lord knows, it would be the first time

53 MINUTES..........

Here is London, giddy of London
Is it home of the free -
Or what ?

Can you squeeze me
Into an empty page of your diary
And psychologically save me
I've got faith in you
I sense the power
Within the fingers
Within an hour the power
Could totally destroy me
(Or, it could save my life)


Oh, here is London
"Home of the brash, outrageous and free"
You are repressed
But you're remarkably dressed
Is it Real ?
And you're always busy


Really busy
Busy, busy
Oh, hairdresser on fire
All around Sloane Square
And you're just so busy
Busy, busy
Busy scissors
Oh, hairdresser on fire
(Only the other day)


Was a client, over-cautious
He made you nervous
And when he said
"I'm gonna sue you"
Oh, I really felt for you ...mmm...


So can you squeeze me
Into an empty page of your diary;
And supernaturally change me ?
Change me, change
Oh, here in London
"Home of the brash, outrageous and free"
You are repressed
But you're remarkably dressed
Is it Real ?
And you're always busy


Really busy
Busy clippers
Oh, hairdresser on fire
All around Sloane Square


And you're just too busy
To see me
Busy clippers
Oh, hairdresser on fire
(Only the other day)

I WALK the LINE

48 minutes until midnight...no time like the present to type up random randomness with a quickness. In the last 24 hours I have watched Walk The Line FINALLY. (thanks to T-Diggy...had his copy on dvd for about 6 months now) GOOD LOOKIN' OUT! What a great film...I was really blown away by the performances of everyone involved...even dude from T2 and The X-Files was in it as the man in black's dad. The Warrior Of Chaos burned me a disc of some Johnny Cash material about 2-3 years ago but I was inspired to go looking for a 'best of'...and find one I did. THE LEGEND OF JOHNNY CASH - put out by Rick Rubin's American label in 2005. Always knew it existed - never picked it up - so glad I did. 21 hot track kids....great stuff. His cover of NIN's "Hurt" is still the most amazing to me, the way he twists it and totally and completely makes it his OWN. The mark of a great cover. So Morrissey is tomorrow and I still haven't seen Spidey 3. I hear people are walking out of it?? Gimme a damn break. Get the fuck outta here with that nonsense. Not because it's Spiderman but, really, how will you KNOW if it's that "bad" if you don't watch the film from start to finish?? Moving right along....Morrissey is tomorrow night. This time tomorrow I may be writing a review of the concert, right here for your reading pleasure/pain. In the meantime, I need to sleep....what a day. Signing off, sincerely yours, straight up and down.....word to the third. Go listen to the man in black dammit.....

MIDNIGHT in a PERFECT WORLD

It's not midnight...about 3 hours shy from that. The sounds of DJ Shadow's "Endtroducing" are coming out the speakers. It's ridiculously good. The last show I went to was DJ Shadow back in September - amazing. No wait, it was Public Enemy in December. Two of my all time favorites right there. Another one of my favorites will be here on Sunday and I'm going to the show - Morrissey. Granted I haven't really been listening to his stuff for the past 6-7 years now, there's no denying the greatness of his solo material and especially his work with The Smiths. His music played a major role in my life coming up, back in high school and college. I would happily listen to Eric B & Rakim, then throw on a Smiths record, back into some shit by Ice Cube, then throw on Vauxhall & I by Morrissey. Allllll over the damn place, but that's a good thing. Look at my cd collection - RUN DMC to The Verve, A Tribe Called Quest to Nine Inch Nails...Al Green to The Beatles, Rage Against The Machine to Digital Underground. (damn DJ Shadow's beats are sick!!!) Cheers to all those reading - I salute you. Ramble young man ramble. SpiderMan 3 is out today and I couldn't be more excited about it. The first one was good, the second one was great. In fact, is there a better comic book movie than SpiderMan 2? I think not. Batman Begins certainly comes close but those Spidey movies are something else. A comic book come to life. Paris Hilton is going to jail - and surprisingly - it's not for trying to sing. The media seems to be a bit out of control...the Entertainment Tonight's and all that - ready to praise all these celebrities and just as quickly, bring them down. That's kinda sad to me...no wonder so many of them crumble under the pressure. (did I mention DJ Shadow is one bad mutha...? DAMN) Tomorrow I've got my son coming over - my little man. He called me today at work and said "daddy, I'm sorry for being grumpy yesterday". So sweet. That's my boy. Whatever would I do without him? Whatever would I do with half the people in my life? Some people just step up more than others. Some people will let you down, others will exceed your expectations on all levels. Some people will make your head spin, others will make you wanna spin their head straight off. (moooooo!) This blog is really really good for me...it's like therapy, only it's for the entire world to read. I think this internet thing might be catching on. Expect the unexpected. Don't be so set in your ways that you can't welcome in new people and new ideas. I'm sorry if I'm all over the place...stuff comes to me and I type like a madman. 2007 - a horrible year that just might turn out okay after all. One can hope right? No matter the outcome, just gotta keep-keep-keepin' on...doin' the damn thing. Whutitdoo whutitdoo?! I could go for a hot tub right now. My mic sounds nice...check one....my mic sounds nice...check two. Leaving you off with a pic from the PE show....they tore that joint down for 2+ hours....crazy. Lifesaver...it's the FLAVA!! Oh, and shout out to my man Champagne - always got my back - we roll deep........somebody get me another drink......

Fresh for 2007 you SUCKAZZZZZ

I had Taco Time for dinner tonight - I crave their veggie wraps. For those reading this who don't live in Seattle or the surrounding areas - I'm so very sorry. But if you come to visit, we can swing by, order what you want, get a ice water with lemon. FRESH. I shouldn't have eaten out tonight...it cost me almost $45 to fill up my damn car. I love my damn car but I do not love the price of damn gas. Thanks again Mr.President. I bet he's giggling like a little biz-otch right now, rolling around in money. Where is Michael Moore? Did he get taken out and Fox News covered it up? Something's not quite right there...although I know he is working on a new film...it'll probably be released next month and I just haven't heard anything. (note to self: subscribe to Entertainment Weekly...one of the few magazines out there I can read from cover to cover) I was listening to Brother Ali on the way home (shocking, I can't seem to get it out of the cd player) and he has a line where he says "being rich is not being broke"...I love that. Shit, I like nice things, but I'm not gonna get into debt or go beyond my means to obtain them. I think all that comes in time ANYWAY. Have patience children. Credit cards are big business. I truly am a rambling mess this evening aren't I? Fun. I'm drinking by myself at the moment...just a drink or two every night and I'm good. I would have liked to have had a martini after work tonight...must make future plans for that. Must make future plans for lots of things. So many ideas running around in this damn head of mine. I'm at a leveling out point I think. 3 weeks ago, I couldn't see past the next day...then, suddenly, and without warning, all that changed. I feel like I'm changing and morphing into a new person...a better stronger person. I like the way that feels. Handle your business, eye on the prize. I need to use this time I have alone to my best advantage, whether it's mixing up Boogie Down Volume Five or writing lyrics to Josh's beats. Josh is a guy I work with - he's a 22 year old beat making master. He scares me with how good he is. I'm hooking him up with my man Illus - would love to see an album come about between the two of them...and I wanna get on the mic too. Record an ep or something...put the demons on wax, do some tracks about some personal shit...just put it down. No time like the present, right? Focus. Eye on the prize. Whatever happens, happens for a reason. It may not be clear now, but in time, everything will all make sense. Focus. Boogie down. Ramble young man ramble. Oh, and not to big up myself or anything, but a coworker today thought that I was 21. 32 in July....WHUT?! So I guess I'm done for now...gonna try and get on here more often to unload all these random thoughts in my head. Thanks for reading...thanks for being so damn fly....

OL' GRUMPY BASTARD

Knock it off. What's your deal? You post one thing every 2 months and now you're doing 2 posts in less than an hour? Ridiculous. Thank you Absolut Vanilla - how I love you so.
I'm good. I'm great actually. People are worried about me. My mom tells me she loves me. My dad gives me hugs instead of hand shakes. The end of the world must be near....but I promise I'm good.
If I didn't have to go to work in the morning I'd probably watch Heathers, then maybe catch a red eye flight to NYC - go to the Bronx to have a slice of pizza for breakfast, take the train to Brooklyn to have a new tattoo done, walk in Central Park with my iPod on random, take in a show on Broadway (maybe Cats, I've seen that shit twice...WHUT?!) or getting to see Spider Man 3 there would be FRESH. Also wanna stop in somewhere and get some new shelltoes, do a little record shopping...and I know exactly who I'd take with me....

POST some new ISH!!!

An interview with M-Eighty is coming soon....but in the meantime, ME and my ramblings. First up, go ahead and do a Google search on me - type in Baird Warnick - and you'll end up right here on this page. If anyone is looking for me, ka-blam, here I am.
I'd like to escape from all this but things are actually starting to level out a bit in my life. While I withdraw from people and keep others at a safe distance, I welcome new and interesting people into my world. People who are genuine, people who, for a lack of a better term, keep it real.
(sidenote: watch When Keepin' It Real Goes Wrong off the Chappelle Show - genius)
I am going through all these up's and down's emotionally...just when I think I'm getting close to "back to normal" (whatever that means) there's another speed bump along the way. Some people just need to keep their mouth shut - especially if your opinion wasn't asked for in the first place. "Well I think"..."Well, if you wanted my opinion"..........did I ask for it? No? SHUT THE FUCK UP. For real, if shit you're about to babble about is not going to be productive or help a person in any way, other than loving the sound of your own voice - KNOCK IT OFF.

I'm done....for the moment......